bisexuality Archives | Queer As Cat

[A]sexuality, [Random] Thoughts, Gender[queer], Queer[ness]

1978 Call Out Culture Is Fierce…! lmao

November 26, 2018 / No Comments

…so, I’ve been reading “The Bisexual Option”, originally published in 1978 by Fritz Klein, in order to write A Thing, when I came across this gem. Feeling personally Called Out by it (who knew 1978 call out culture was so fierce?!) and yet am also not– all at the same time. Either way, feeling the need to put my sardonic lulz here for my own future entertainment. Oh, and no. As interesting as it is at times, I don’t recommend reading the book yourself unless you’re prepared to metaphorically grit your teeth the whole way through. Consider this to be me having read it so that you don’t have to. 🙂 Willing to share my findings with those who are interested, but really I’m just reading the book to critique it zzz…

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Vesper H.

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Q&A: “I identify as homoflexible, it’s what fits me best, but I didn’t realize it was biphobic…”

December 23, 2017 / No Comments

anonymous said Hi I saw your post about homoflexibility and I wanted to ask you about it. I think I identify as homoflexible, it’s what fits me best, but I didn’t realize it was biphobic and I’m really freaked out because I don’t want to be biphobic it’s just what fits me best. I don’t consider myself bi because while I occasionally can have attraction to guys I don’t want a relationship(or sex) with a guy, I just don’t. But I’m not a lesbian either because I can occasionally experience attraction to guys. hi anon, first of all, sorry for taking so long to respond to your ask. i hope you’re well. i’m guessing that the post that you’re referring to is this one? as i tried to make clear in the original post, i was only voicing my own personal qualms with common definitions of homoflexible (and heteroflexible) and…

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Vesper H.

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Q&A: “is there a sexuality between straight and bisexual?”

July 6, 2017 / No Comments

anonymous said: is there a sexuality between straight and bisexual? coz i used to think i’m straight but now i’m a bit attracted to girls??? maybe i’m simply just bi-curious??? if you mean is there a word for being primarily attracted to people that society has decided are “the opposite” gender from you, but occasionally / fleetingly / sporadically / spontaneously being attracted to people society has decided are “the same” gender as you, heteroflexibility, bi-curiosity and bisexuality come to mind. heteroflexibility is probably closest to the word that you’re looking for, but at the same time i hate to see bi-curiosity being dismissed as being “simply just” anything like this. society as a whole has this ridiculous tendency to be dismissive of bi-curiosity and people who feel a tie to this word, with such bullshit quips as “everyone’s a little bi!” similarly, people are quick to decide that someone isn’t bi…

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Vesper H.

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Black Mirror: “San Junipero”

July 6, 2017 / No Comments

got home from work, made dinner and sat down to watch another episode of Black Mirror on Netflix before bed, as one does. was totally not prepared for what turned out not to be the queerbaiting i first assumed it to be, but to instead be a heart-wrenching queer romance between a bi / multiple gender attracted black woman and a gay woman exploring intimacy for the first time. not only was the story itself a tear-jerker, the characters themselves were well-developed and included quite possibly the most in-depth and positive representation that i’ve ever seen of a bi black woman character in particular in popular media. even consent– something that a lot of media doesn’t put enough thought into– was handled fairly well (imho) and the episode certainly explored things that other media tends to only dance around if touch upon at all, all crammed into a 60 minute…

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Vesper H.

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Q&A: “I think I’m bi? But I’ve never been attracted to women before so why now?”

March 6, 2017 / No Comments

anonymous said: Hi Vesper. So Idk how to put it but I identified as a straight girl my whole life until recently. I’ve been getting attracted to women. I think I’m bi? But I’ve never been attracted to women before so why now? Idk how to feel about this bc I know ppl have discourse about whether you’re born LGBT+ or you can change into it and I’m confused. I’ve never thought about being romantic with women before but right now I’d be totally ok. idk Why all of a sudden. I feel fake idk is this a normal feeling? hi, anon. i’m no expert, but i think it’s safe to say that what you’re experiencing is not uncommon at all. like many things in life, sexuality can change. that is to say that who one is attracted to, the ways in which you experience (or even don’t experience) that…

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Vesper H.

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Q&A: “I’ve heard it called “queer straightness”…”

October 19, 2016 / No Comments

dear anon from this post, upon hitting “post” after typing up a response to your most recent asks, Tumblr decided to be a Piece Of Shit and not actually post the ask at all. i have no idea where that ask even went, but thanks to a browser extension i still have my response to the asks word-for-word, so here it is without the first part of the ask and thus missing a lot of context for everyone else, but oh well… (2) I’ve heard it called “queer straightness”. Imo that’s not a reason to banish anyone from anywhere , but then again, I don’t know how things work over there. Thanks again for answering, now I understand this whole situation better. ( re: this post ) thanks for coming back and responding to my response, anon, and i apologize from totally running away with your ask. my response was…

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Vesper H.

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Q&A: “I have a question about the definition of bisexuality.”

October 18, 2016 / No Comments

anonymous said: Hi! I have a question about the definition of bisexuality. I’ve been using a “same + different” -definition and that’s what I’ve seen being used the most. “Two or more” is alright, but if “same gender” is not required, why is it not under heterosexuality? I’m assuming the reason is political, but I want to be sure. hello anon, i’m guessing that this ask is related to this post where i say that i personally find defining bi as attraction to “same and different / other gender(s)” to be problematic. there’s actually nothing “political” about why a person doesn’t have to experience attraction towards people of the “same” or “similar” gender to be bi. that is, unless you consider the feelings and experiences of bi non-binary people to be “political,” which i sincerely hope not. the reason why i personally, as well as many others, find the “same and different / other” definition of bi to…

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Vesper H.

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Q&A: “Can a person be bi and just don’t enjoy some type of genitalia?”

October 12, 2016 / No Comments

anonymous said: Hi! i have a bit of an akward question: Can a person be bi and just don’t enjoy some type of genitalia? I’m bi and i dislike penises. There’s no way around it, i’ve tried a few and they just don’t do i for me. My LGBTI friends of course tell me i’m actually a lesbian, but that’s not it. It doesn’t matter the gender of the person attatched to the penis, i just don’t like the thing and it freaks me out because what if i’m faking it? Can i be bi and don’t like dick? hi anon, anyone, regardless of their sexual orientation, can be averse to or repulsed by genitalia. genitalia aversion / repulsion– or any other kind of aversion / repulsions for that matter– does not define your sexuality unless you feel like it does. who you’re attracted to (or not attracted to), how…

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Vesper H.

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Q&A: “i’m a non-binary person and sometimes i feel weird calling myself bi/pan?”

July 3, 2016 / No Comments

anonymous said: so, i’m a non-binary (more specifically trans-masculine) person and sometimes i feel weird calling myself bi/pan? like, i have a hard time figuring out what to call my sexuality, since i feel that many of the labels for sexuality aren’t really designed with nb people in mind. i just… don’t know if you’ve ever had similar feelings? oh definitely, i have felt that way before. in fact, i was at a non-binary meeting yesterday and this was a subject that came up. some people took no issue with bi, while others did. there was talk of how pan was coined in response to (the assumption of) bi being binarist and erasing or exclusionary of non-binary people and how people felt about that. some felt it was a good thing that pan was coined, others had no opinion as they don’t identify as either and were sorely missing the…

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Vesper H.

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that feel when

June 23, 2016 / 1 Comment

everyone outside of the ace community automatically reads your bi identity as ‘bisexual’ and everyone within the ace community automatically reads your bi identity as ‘biromantic’ because everyone assumes forgets that a person can just simply be bi or that there’s more to a person’s sexuality than just -sexual / -romantic.

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Vesper H.

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