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Queer As Cat

gender・ sexuality・ race ・intersectionality

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  • Home
  • About
    • About QAC
    • About Vesper
  • Photos
    • Instagram
    • Tokyo Rainbow Pride
      • 2014
      • 2015
      • 2016
      • 2017
      • 2018
  • Resources
    • Asexual POC Resources
    • #LGBTQIA in Japan
  • Contact

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Twitter

My Tweets

Instagram

  • 「迷い道」 . ...i really miss the 雰囲気 of urban jungles like Tokyo... ;( . . . . . . . . #tokyo #japan #igersjp #urbanexploration #urbanphotography #urbanjungle #citylife #citylights #nightlife #cityview #bw_captures #bw_lover #bnw_society #bnwmood #bnw_captures #新橋 #東京 #光 #夜景 #モノクロ #白黒
  • Hitachinaka Matsuri 2018 . i think this was the last 祭り/festival that i got to see before leaving Japan... but at least i got to see it with @nonbinaryish.
  • STORMcell . . . . . . . . . . . . #clouds #cloudscape #storm #weather #sky #ig_skylovers #instasky #instaclouds #blackandwhite #bnwmood #bw_captures #bnw_society #bw_photooftheday #yokohama #桜木町 #横浜 #モノクロ #白黒
  • Q&A

    Q&A: “I really need some advice, i have social anxiety & I recently went out with a friend…”

    November 30, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: I really need some advice, i have social anxiety & I recently went out with a friend, she said their would only be a few other people there I didn’t know but when we went out there was a lot of people there I didn’t know on top of my friend ignoring me most of the time, I felt alone & anxious . Afterwards she bugged me until I told her what was wrong & now she’s made at me. I feel like I’m crazy I’ve been having panic attacks ever since. I feel like a horrible person & I don’t know what to do you’re most certainly not a horrible person, anon. you’ve done absolutely nothing wrong and how you feel / felt (both now and at the time) is understandable and no fault of your own. as far as i’m concerned, your friend has no reason…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    “the ace community goes overboard with words?” i.e. word vomitted “nah”

    April 5, 2018

    Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”

    February 23, 2016
  • [Random] Thoughts,  Gender[queer],  Japan[ese],  Mental [Un]health,  Queer[ness]

    QAC 55.5 – Life Update: Post-Election Mental Health | Staying In Japan | Outted To Dad

    November 23, 2016 / No Comments

    two weeks ago any vague plans that i’d had for my immediate future were abruptly shattered when America elected Trump as the next president of the United States. two weeks later, i’m still struggling to cope with the news and the resulting blow to my already poor mental health. in this video, i give voice to my thoughts on being forced to navigate HRT in Japan and forgo (for the time being) other gender-related medical things that i’d hoped to pursue in America. i also talk about possibly moving to Tokyo in a year’s time, having been outted to my dad via Twitter and a new book by Ashley Mardell that i highly recommend. longass video is long, so here are some jump points for those of you only interested in specific things. @00:00 – post-election mental health @03:50 – shattered future; staying in Japan @08:55 – name change, HRT…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    my soon-to-be goblin

    September 12, 2017

    “the faces of Vesper”

    June 8, 2014

    a 1.5 hour conversation with a random Nigirian

    October 12, 2017
  • [A]sexuality,  Black[ness],  Gender[queer],  Mental [Un]health,  Queer[ness],  YouTube[r]

    Re: QAC 51 – #ProudToBe Black Non-Binary Bi Pan AND Asexual

    June 23, 2016 / 1 Comment

    ah, i had the most amusing day today, getting notifications on my phone for the comments left on this video. i’m not even pissed off anymore, it’s now become hilarious. people are saying that 4chan is behind the spam / hate attack on the #ProudToBe spotlight / hashtag and somehow that just makes it even more hilarious to me. i’m so amused that i felt like screencapping some of the 66 comments i’ve gotten on the video so far. trigger warning for pretty much any and everything. please respect your triggers. don’t read any further if you aren’t in a place where you can laugh at all this hate with me. me: *every time i got a notification on my phone today* this is when my apathy-fortified wall of No Fucks Given seems like a really awesome coping mechanism because it allows me to brush off / laugh off otherwise…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

    You May Also Like

    Tokyo Rainbow Pride 2016 (5/8/2016)

    May 14, 2016

     “Things Asexual People Want You To Know” – BuzzFeed LGBT

    October 29, 2017

    QAC 16 – Asexuality and the LGBTQ Community

    September 9, 2013
  • Feedback,  Mental [Un]health,  Q&A

    Q&A not Q&A: “you’re personality REALLY reminds me of me. I’m also what you call “apathetic as hell.””

    June 19, 2016 /

    anonymous said: you’re personality REALLY reminds me of me. I’m also what you call “apathetic as hell.” I just think you can catch more flies with honey. People shut down if you automatically start tearing them down. You don’t build yourself (& others) up by tearing someone (& others) down. PLUS you’ll NEVER get them to understand what you’re talking about if you attack them back because they’ll be in their defensive mindset. It’s effective in helping people evolve. It’s also important to pick your fights. If you’re constantly fighting not only are you going to drain yourself but people will start to take your fighting level as a basic level of how you react to things and they’ll take you less seriously. Also some people do screw up and don’t realize it; informing them on the issue and helping them improve themselves is better than just throwing them under…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”

    February 23, 2016
  • [Random] Thoughts,  Japan[ese],  Mental [Un]health,  Queer[ness]

    Pulse.

    June 13, 2016 / No Comments

    …as if dealing with the news itself and the media’s handling of it isn’t enough, i’m going to have to go through the week (and for however long after) listening to lots of opinions and commentary on the event that i would really rather do without, all while keeping my own feelings and opinion in check because, you know. that’s the nature of my job. somehow i’m going to have to muster up the energy to up my game with my Everything’s Okay face this week. …i’m exhausted already just thinking about it. ugh.

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    them gay enbian feels

    October 16, 2016

    “yellow as a maverique”

    June 25, 2014

    “Dyke Deck” by Catherine Opie

    November 20, 2016
  • [Random] Thoughts,  Gender[queer],  Japan[ese],  Queer[ness]

    …the things i do to not be a ひきこもり (その①)

    March 11, 2016 / 1 Comment

    ahhh, okay so i just need to vent. feel free to ignore this. someone in an Xジェンダー (Japanese non-binary) group that i’m in posted a link to a party being held in Tokyo on the 26th. there’s often some kinda of gay (literally always with fine print saying ‘men only’) or lesbian (literally always with fine print saying ‘women only’) event going on in Tokyo. more recently there are events aimed at trans men– but anyway, the point is i’m none of those things. and i haven’t really cared that much because i’m the definition of introversion. i have zero interest in night life and all of these events always happen at night. why is it that LGBTQ events more often than not involve late nights, loud music and copious amounts of alcohol??? moving on.

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    カルシファー、お帰り。 Welcome Home, Calcifer.

    September 17, 2017

    5 years and counting…

    May 14, 2018

    sigh.

    July 23, 2017
  • Q&A

    Q&A not Q&A: “could that monosexual/allosexual argument be compared to colorism?”

    January 13, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: im whiteish so i dont feel comfortable speaking on this as if i know it personally but could i ask you… could that monosexual/allosexual argument be compared to colorism? like for example a lighter/paler person of X race is going to be oppressed on basis of race, but that doesnt stop them from being able to oppress a darker person of the same race. or lateral oppression between races, like if a black person and an east asian person call each other racial slurs it’s not like thats NOT racism… (in reference to this post) going to avoid discussing who has the potential to oppress who and all discussion of oppression in general that may lead to an Oppression Olympics, but… colorism is most certainly a thing, especially in the black community which is really the only community that i can speak personally of. imho, the trend of saying…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”

    February 23, 2016

    “the ace community goes overboard with words?” i.e. word vomitted “nah”

    April 5, 2018
  • [A]sexuality,  Black[ness],  Queer[ness],  YouTube[r]

    an example of intersectional acephobia if ever there was one…

    December 16, 2015 / No Comments

    “…seriously??” i thought to myself upon getting this notification via the YouTube app, in my email inbox and then on the YouTube homepage. i was just going to ignore it and move on, but after seeing the same notification for a third time i decided to look further… …i was prepared for things to get worse, but not this worse. the above is only a sample of the bullshit that can be found on this guy’s YouTube channel. dare i even subject myself to watching any of the videos, let alone the video in question? as always, curiosity killed the cat… ……..so this guy was pointed in my direction by someone who has obviously watched several of my videos (ie. by someone who cannot not know that i am non-binary) but who is still misgendering me and who for some reason felt the need to disclose personal information about me, my mental health…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    Antiblackness and Binarism: Grindr in Japan

    January 6, 2018

    Black Mirror: “San Junipero”

    July 6, 2017

    them gay enbian feels

    October 16, 2016
  • Mental [Un]health,  YouTube[r]

    QAC 43 – Coming to Terms w/ Depression & Anxiety | Mental Health

    December 7, 2015 / 1 Comment

    my journey to self-awareness and self-acceptance regarding the state of my own mental health has been a long one. 15-some-odd years i’ve been struggling with persistent depression and social anxiety and my journey is far from over. in this video i talk about how i went for over a decade without even knowing what “mental health” even was and how i’ve struggled going from that to where i am today, having finally accepted my mental health for what it is. i also briefly mention how the intersectionality of race, sexuality and gender factored into my struggle with mental wellbeing. for those who’d prefer to read most of what was said here, check out this Tumblr post: http://tmblr.co/Z04EMt1y9JmEq the video ended up being fairly long, but oh well. i’m glad i wrote most of it out and posted it to Tumblr first then sat on it for weeks. made talking about…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    chronic long-term memory problems…

    July 4, 2018

    QAC 34 – Distancing Yourself From Family

    February 16, 2015

    …the state of this blog, basically.

    May 28, 2017
  • Mental [Un]health

    Persistent Depression & Anxiety: My Personal Journey

    November 15, 2015 / 1 Comment

    this post corresponds to a vlog that i will be posting have posted on my channel soon, but i figured i’d write out my feelings now and test the waters on Tumblr first. warning: talk of death and self-harm, along with lots of negativity in general. also, this post is extremely long. 15-some-odd years. that’s how long i guesstimate that i’ve been suffering from depression and anxiety. and yet i’ve only become aware of this over the course of the past 3~ years and have only come to accept it within the last year. like my sexuality and gender, mental health is something i’ve had to learn about and navigate entirely on my own. the journey has been rough

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

    You May Also Like

    QAC 59 – Antidepressants 3 Months Later | BetterHelp: Online Therapy| World Mental Health Day

    October 10, 2017

    QAC 43 – Coming to Terms w/ Depression & Anxiety | Mental Health

    December 7, 2015

    Re: QAC 51 – #ProudToBe Black Non-Binary Bi Pan AND Asexual

    June 23, 2016
12345

VESPER H.

YouTuber & Blogger

Queer As Cat is the blog and YouTube channel of Vesper, an American expat currently living in Japan.
reoccurring topics include: #asexuality, #nonbinary, #queerness #blackness & #mentalhealth

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Recent Posts

  • literal “social distancing” from the ace community April 1, 2020
  • legalized weed in America: one of many chips on my Black shoulder March 7, 2020
  • willpower, sweat, and tears January 30, 2020
  • 🎬 QAC 79 – The Neverending Queer-y: My Queer Ace Journey || LGBT YouTube & COPPA January 4, 2020
  • #YouTubeIsOverParty: COPPA & The Hypocrisy of YouTube December 15, 2019

Categories

Time Machine

Tags

ace anon aromantic asexual asexuality asks bi feedback gender gender identity genderqueer identity intersectionality intracommunity issues i rant when i'm tired japan LGBT lgbt in Japan LGBTQIA life in japan maverique me non-binary nonbinary in Japan opinion personal problematic things QPOC queer questioning random thoughts sexuality stuff i made terminology this has been a Vesper original this is my life tired Vesper is tired trans transgender vlog Xジェンダー youtube セクマイ 外人の目から見た日本 日本

Categories

Instagram

  • Hitachinaka Matsuri 2018 . i think this was the last 祭り/festival that i got to see before leaving Japan... but at least i got to see it with @nonbinaryish.
  • STORMcell . . . . . . . . . . . . #clouds #cloudscape #storm #weather #sky #ig_skylovers #instasky #instaclouds #blackandwhite #bnwmood #bw_captures #bnw_society #bw_photooftheday #yokohama #桜木町 #横浜 #モノクロ #白黒
  • 「迷い道」 . ...i really miss the 雰囲気 of urban jungles like Tokyo... ;( . . . . . . . . #tokyo #japan #igersjp #urbanexploration #urbanphotography #urbanjungle #citylife #citylights #nightlife #cityview #bw_captures #bw_lover #bnw_society #bnwmood #bnw_captures #新橋 #東京 #光 #夜景 #モノクロ #白黒
  • Z i G . . . . . . . . . . #urbanexploration #urbanphotography #stairs #geometric #lines #shapes #minimalism #grainisgood #bnw_society #bw_captures #bnwphoto #bw_lover #bnw_zone #階段 #散歩 #お出かけ #モノクロ #白黒
  • 六本木ヒルズからの雰囲気 . . . . . . . . . . #roppongi #roppongihills #cityscape #skyline #tokyo #tokyotower #citylife #tokyolife #contrast #bnwmood #bnw_society #bw_lover #blackandwhitephotographylovers #instablackandwhite #bw_photooftheday #blackandwhite #igersjp #六本木ヒルズ #六本木ヒルズ展望台 #東京 #上から目線 #東京タワー #モノクロ #白黒
  • "Changing Rooms" by Leandro Erlich . . . . . . . . . . . #moriartmuseum #leandroerlich #dressingroomselfie #changingroom #mirrors #artappreciation #exhibition #iloveart #bnwmood #bnw_society #bw_lover #blackandwhitephotographylovers #instablackandwhite #bw_photooftheday #blackandwhite #igersjp #鏡 #アート #美術館 #モノクロ #白黒
  • "Pulled by the Roots" by Leandro Erlich . . . . . . . . . . . #moriartmuseum #leandroerlich #house #roots #sculpture #artappreciation #exhibition #iloveart #bnwmood #bnw_society #bw_lover #blackandwhitephotographylovers #instablackandwhite #bw_photooftheday #blackandwhite #igersjp #家 #アート #美術館 #モノクロ #白黒
  • "The Room (Surveillance I)" by Leandro Erlich . . . . . . . . . . . #moriartmuseum #leandroerlich #perspective #surveillance #mirrors #artappreciation #exhibition #iloveart #bnwmood #bnw_society #bw_lover #blackandwhitephotographylovers #instablackandwhite #bw_photooftheday #blackandwhite #igersjp #部屋 #アート #美術館 #モノクロ #白黒

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