language Archives | Page 4 of 4 | Queer As Cat

Gender[queer], Q&A, Queer[ness]

Q&A: “have you seen that discussion about a word for the prejudice against enbies…?”

May 6, 2016 / No Comments

anonymous said: have you seen that discussion about a word for the prejudice against enbies on vergess’ blog? what do you think? no, i hadn’t seen the discussion prior to this ask. i assume that you’re referring to this discussion which seems to have been triggered by this post? i’m going to reblog the latter post later because what everyone’s saying there is really, really important, but for now i’m in a hurry, so… the condensed version of my thoughts: i think it’s great that @vergess and others are trying to coin a word to describe the unique challenges, prejudice, etc that non-binary people face, which i whole heartedly agree is different from what binary trans people face. personally, i’ve always used ‘non-binary erasure’ and ‘(gender) binarism’ to discuss such things, so i haven’t felt a strong need to coin a word for it. that said, it is true that in years…

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Vesper H.

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Q&A: “been following the allosexual debate. it seems like it’s not really about allosexual?”

May 4, 2016 / No Comments

anonymous said: been following the allosexual debate. it seems like it’s not really about allosexual? it’s about any term that groups non ace spec people apart from ace spec people, that it’s harmful to talk in any way about people who aren’t ace spec? because any non ace spec term could include people who don’t identify with sexual attraction or who don’t feel sexual attraction is important to or a defining part of their orientation? with the debate being framed on allosexual I’m not sure if I’m parsing right. (I mean about the way that allosexual, or any term for non ace spec people, is intended to be used, as a simple “not us” grouping for discussion purposes, not anything extra/problematic someone might do with the term or lump onto the term) indeed, many of the arguments that people are making against the usage of the word allosexual aren’t even really…

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Vesper H.

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QAC 28 – On “Blackness”, Queer Identity & Intersectionality (a rant)
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QAC 49 – Singular ‘They’ | Gender Neutral Pronouns | This Has Been A PSA

April 24, 2016 / No Comments

singular ‘they’: voted word of the year in 2015 by the American Dialect Society, used by English speakers everywhere– even by Shakespeare– and yet today some people insist on claiming that using ‘they’ in the singular is “ungrammatical,” “trendy” or “uneducated.” pull up a chair and have a seat, because if you’re one of those people, this video was made for you. but hold up, there’s no way i’d put so much time and effort into a video just for your pathetic ass. more than anything, this video is dedicated to everyone out there fighting to have their pronouns remembered, used and respected. as hard as it is, don’t give up or feel guilty for asking people to use your pronouns. your comfort is important. your identity is valid. your request to be referred to with specific pronouns is 100% justified and worth fighting for. stay strong. next time someone…

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Vesper H.

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random thoughts on ‘genderqueer’ & ‘non-binary’

March 9, 2016 / No Comments

unknought wrote in: “What you describe as feeling “degendered” by being called non-binary seems similar to how some people eventually started feeling about the term/identity genderqueer.” Would you be able to say more about this and/or provide a source? I had just been asking people about how nonbinary seems to have taken the place genderqueer had five years ago, and it sounds like you have an idea what’s been going on there? (in reference to this post) all that follows is nothing more than my opinion and personal observation, but… reflecting back over the past 6 years in which i personally have gone from identifying as genderqueer to not using the term to describe myself at all anymore, i feel like i’ve seen three major things happen within online genderqueer and non-binary communities that have ultimately resulted in the decline in usage of the word “genderqueer” by some people?…

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Vesper H.

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Dear White People: About “People of Color” (POC)

December 23, 2015 / No Comments

this is post is the blog version of a vlog that i recently posted to my YouTube channel. the content is essentially the same, but feel free to check out both. as you can probably tell by the title, this is going to be a rant. that said, i hope that something can be learned from it. why have i titled this “Dear White People”? even if white people aren’t solely guilty of what i’m about to talk about, i’m calling out white people specifically because i see white people of various countries doing this far more than anyone else. if you yourself are white and you consider yourself to be an ally to people of color, this post was written specifically for you.

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Vesper H.

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QAC 44 – Dear White People: About “People of Color” (POC) | A Rant

December 20, 2015 / No Comments

i’ve long since had issues with how some people, specifically white people, repeatedly misuse the term “People of Color” (aka “POC”). at long last i’m finally putting my frustrations into words in the hope of bringing awareness to these issues. in the interest of being as brief as possible, in this video i’ve summarize my issues regarding white people’s usage of this term into two points: treating POC as if they are a homogeneous group. ( @00:29 ~ ) treating whiteness as if it is the default not only in one’s own country, but internationally. ( @4:12 ~ ) obviously when people who consider themselves to be allies to POC make such mistakes the mistakes are honest ones with no ill intent behind them. however, that does not change the fact that mistakes are being made and that these mistakes should be corrected. if you consider yourself to be an…

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Vesper H.

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Q&A: “…do you think there could be other types of attraction?”

July 7, 2015 / No Comments

anonymous said: I know a lot of the time in discussions about asexual identities people break down attraction into 4 different categories: sexual, romantic, aesthetic, sensual (well and sometimes platonic). But do you think there could be other types of attraction? Sometimes I see people and I feel /something/ but I wouldn’t really categorize it as one of those – argh its so confusing! Am I just experiencing one of those types of attraction in a strange way?? without a doubt there could be (read: probably is) more to attraction than the categories that the ace and aro communities tend to refer to. attraction, as with feelings in general, is an insanely complex thing that most certainly cannot be neatly boxed into or described by categories. it doesn’t get said enough that not everyone even finds the existing categories helpful or meaningful in describing their attraction(s). you could be experiencing…

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Vesper H.

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Q&A: “what does it mean when people identify as bi/pan or poly/pan or any other combination like that?”

June 23, 2015 / No Comments

anonymous said: Im sorry if this is a dumb question, but what does it mean when people identify as bi/pan or poly/pan or any other combination like that. Is it like romantically they’re pan and sexually they’re bi, vice versa. Or is it something like they fall along somewhere between the two? I don’t know if I worded this clearly, I’m really curious and confused. Thank you for your time, you have a great blog btw. there is an infinite number of reasons why someone might identify as/with more than one orientation at the same time. for example, having a sexual orientation that differs from their romantic/etc orientation feeling like those orientations equally describe who they are feeling like a combination of those orientations feeling somewhere in between those orientations having a fluid sexuality that shifts between those orientations having a desire to be visible as a member of…

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Vesper H.

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Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”
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Q&A not Q&A: “For the longest time, I identified as demiro, for a pretty similar reason.”

April 4, 2015 / No Comments

anonymous said: For the longest time, I identified as demiro, for a pretty similar reason. I never understood romance for what it apparently is– I don’t now, either– but I have always had pretty intense squishes. Romance seemed like the “answer”– a grown-up, committed relationship, more than friendship. But, similar to what you’ve said, I was never the one to initiate it. My confusion really culminated when my romantic partner way back when told me that he loved me, and I…just couldn’t say it back. I got even more confused later as I kept seeing these squishes as romance, questioning my “sexuality” as I developed one on a same-gendered friend, who later shot me down horribly. Another relationship revealed that I thought of my partner as a sibling, not as anything romantic. I’m in a QPR now, after figuring things out “enough,” but there’s still a lot of confusion; I still…

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Vesper H.

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Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”
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QAC 24 – Labels: Why They’re Important + Why I Use Them

March 17, 2014 / No Comments

a blurb about labels, their importance and why i use them. because i talk too damn much: @00:00 – update about my mom @00:52 – labels: more than just identity @05:22 – labels can suck @07:08 – why labels are important & why i use them i’m a little crazy in the beginning, but i swear i start making sense towards the end. ;(

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Vesper H.

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