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Q&A: “You like photography!?…”
@citricsunshine said: You like photography!? 8D What do you like to take pictures of? (besides your cat of course, who is super cute!) thanks. 🙂 i usually take photos of: ? architecture ? nature ? cityscape ? patterns / shapes
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Q&A: “I don’t have any interest in a romantic or sexual relationship, but I know I can feel romantic attraction…”
anonymous said: Hi Vesper. I’m pretty certain that I like on both the aro- and Ace-spectrums; I’m not exactly sure where, but I’m not comfortable using the q word (I’m not sure what your blog’s policy in the word is, but better safe than sorry). I don’t have any interest in a romantic or sexual relationship, but I know I can feel romantic attraction. I’ve recently started just describing myself as “basically Aroace” and was wondering what your thoughts on the acceptability of this are. my opinion is that you should and have every right to use whatever words feel comfortable for you in describing yourself and that any and all consideration given to the “acceptability” of it can and should get the fuck out of your way if its making things difficult or uncomfortable for you, but that’s just me. having only gotten 6ish hours of sleep over the…
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Q&A: “what do you use for recording and editing your videos?”
anonymous said: If you don’t mind my asking, what do you use for recording and editing your videos? I’ve thought about doing youtube before but have little idea of what kinds of equipment to invest in. i don’t mind at all, anon. actually, i wouldn’t recommend investing too much, if anything at all, into YouTube starting out. a lot of people have really strong intentions starting out and rush out to buy a nice camera, but end up not continuing with their channel for whatever unforseen reason. also, until you’ve actually given YouTube a try, it’s hard to know what exactly works best for you in terms of equipment, setup, etc. having said all that, to finally answer your question, i use some relatively high-end equipment that isn’t at all what i started out with, nor what i’d recommend to someone just starting out. i have a Canon 5D Mark…
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Q&A: “Can a maverique person consider themself man or woman-aligned?”
anonymous said: You may have answered a similar question before, and if so I apologize, it’s possible that I missed it! I was wondering, can a maverique person consider themself man or woman-aligned? And if a person considered themself woman-aligned and maverique, could they consider themself sapphic, or would you say being sapphic is inherently at odds with being maverique? Navigating the recent alignment discourse as a maverique has been rough for me, and I’d like to hear your thoughts. hi, anon. no worries. i’ve answered a similar question before, but not on this blog. check out what i said [ here ] over on @maveriques. i’m afraid that my answer to the question you’ve asked has not changed at all since responding to the linked ask. that said, i’m really sorry to hear that recent aligned terminology (i’m not caught up at all on any related discourse) has been rough…
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Q&A: “…I can kind of relate to what your earlier post is about the representations of androgyny and nonbinary people…”
anonymous said: hey I just wanted to say that I can kind of relate to what your earlier post is about, not in that i’m black but in that i’m amab and the representations of androgyny and nonbinary people I see tend to be of a white, slim, crew cut hair cut with afab secondary sex characteristics, like a white pre-t trans man. my face is distincitvely male so it’s really not possible for me to pull off that look you were talking about because I can’t fit into that narrow somewhat accepted box. I might be getting a bit philosphical but I think that society see things in categories, like the light spectrum, even though there are infinite shades we demarcate them into 8 colours, in the past lgbt was pretty much all the colours there were, now there’s lgbtqia+. So if it’s any consolation as someone who is…
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Q&A: “I identify as homoflexible, it’s what fits me best, but I didn’t realize it was biphobic…”
anonymous said Hi I saw your post about homoflexibility and I wanted to ask you about it. I think I identify as homoflexible, it’s what fits me best, but I didn’t realize it was biphobic and I’m really freaked out because I don’t want to be biphobic it’s just what fits me best. I don’t consider myself bi because while I occasionally can have attraction to guys I don’t want a relationship(or sex) with a guy, I just don’t. But I’m not a lesbian either because I can occasionally experience attraction to guys. hi anon, first of all, sorry for taking so long to respond to your ask. i hope you’re well. i’m guessing that the post that you’re referring to is this one? as i tried to make clear in the original post, i was only voicing my own personal qualms with common definitions of homoflexible (and heteroflexible) and…
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QAC 63 – Story Time: Coming Out To A Coworker || Visibly Queer | Non-Binary || The T Files #003
ever tried to come out to someone only to be met with “i already knew that”? before last week, i couldn’t say that i have, but when a coworker thinks their “gaydar” is on-point, but that gaydar ever-so-predictably fails to extend beyond just “GAY”, mental eye rolling, story time and a mini word vomit ensue. what does it mean to be “visibly queer” and why is it that more often than not ‘queer’ is often taken to be synonymous with “gay”? and is there any such thing as “visibly trans” or “visibly non-binary”? don’t expect to find any answers here, as it took me considerable effort just to limit my apathetic word vomit to 5 minutes zzz… two days post-recording and much sleep deprivation later…
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QAC 62 – The Road To HRT: Fears, Goals & Compromise || Non-Binary || The T Files #002
when i first started this channel not long after having just began to explore and embrace my gender, i didn’t consider HRT / testosterone to even be a card on the table for me to play. HRT was something that others did and that i was judged for not wanting to do; it was for people who experienced “real”, bodily dysphoria, not people like me whose dysphoria was largely derivative of society and whose complicated relationship with the very idea of medically “transitioning” was used as a means of invalidation by others. i can’t help but imagine 2013 Vesper looking at 2017 Vesper with silent, candid irony as they brush aside the years of others’ bullshit to finally confront their own.
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whiteness as default
as usual, i find myself turning to YouTube as a resource for information only to be reminded that…. YouTube is So Damn White. most things non-binary and / or trans are So Damn White. a search for “non-binary” and “testosterone” turns up almost nothing but skinny, short haired, white, non-binary people, none of whom i can really see myself in. which is nothing new. that’s part of the reason i’m on YouTube in the first place. beyond that, a bigger problem that i find myself faced with is that the very image / concept of “androgyny” or stereotypical “non-binary appearance” is inherently linked to whiteness. i want people to pause before they misgender me (seeing as how they will inevitably misgender me regardless) and the best way to bring about that is, presumably, androgynous appearance. however, androgyny feels unobtainable to me as a black person, because no matter what i…
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gender feels; racial trauma.
as usual, i find myself turning to YouTube as a resource for information only to be reminded that…. YouTube is So Damn White. most things non-binary and / or trans are So Damn White. a search for “non-binary” and “testosterone” turns up almost nothing but skinny, short haired, white, non-binary people, none of whom i can really see myself in. which is nothing new. that’s part of the reason i’m on YouTube in the first place.