2016 | Page 18 of 30 | Queer As Cat

[A]sexuality, Gender[queer], Q&A, Queer[ness]

Q&A: “Idk if this is a valid thing but I know I love women and I also seem to love nb folks…”

July 1, 2016 / No Comments

anonymous said: Idk if this is a valid thing but I know I love women and I also seem to love nb folks. I myself am nonbinary so I know they’re real and valid genders and such but there’s always a bit of me that worries that I like women and just want to feel special. Or at least that others will always assume that what you’re feeling is 100% valid, anon. imho, it sounds like you might be struggling with internalized monosexism. the same ignorance, stigma, etc within society that repeatedly tells bi people that they’re really just gay or straight and they’re just doing whatever it is that they’re doing (ie. loving who they love) for attention or to feel special. that they have to pick one gender to love or else they’re being ‘greedy’ or ‘confused’. it’s a large part of what fuels biphobia and many people who…

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Vesper H.

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Q&A: “What do you call my sexuality in this scenario?”

June 29, 2016 / No Comments

anonymous said: Hey hello hi, so I just recently came to the fact that im attracted physically to men and not sexually, but im attracted to woman physically and sexually. Ive always identified myself as a Lesbian and im confused now cus i found out i feel attracted to men. I DONT wanna do any sexually things with them, NEVER, but i find them attractive? like hardcore. What do you call my sexuality in this scenario? YO and thanks it’s up to you what you call yourself, anon. you could choose to continue to identify as a lesbian if you want to. being a lesbian doesn’t necessarily mean that you aren’t attracted to men in any way whatsoever, imho. then again, you could also identify as something else if you want to. some people are attracted to different genders in different ways. a woman who is sexually and romantically attracted to women…

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Vesper H.

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Q&A: “That’s part of the reason why I so strongly hold onto “queer” as one of my labels!”

June 29, 2016 / No Comments

anonymous said: That’s part of the reason why I so strongly hold onto “queer” as one of my labels! I identify under both the ace and aro umbrellas, but it’s weird and hard to explain and trying to say I’m bi/pan/poly/etc (even without -romantic) carries that weird connotation that doesn’t fit me. I actually think you just managed to put my feelings into words??? I’m having an epiphany and I need to go think about this more. (re: this post) i know right? i’m also very fond of ‘queer’ as a word and identity and identify strongly with it. sometimes i refer to myself as a ‘queer asexual’ rather than as a ‘bi / pan asexual’ for the sake of brevity and/or to avoid assumptions, depending on the situation and who i’m talking to. whenever i do that, ‘queer’ isn’t acting as a replacement for ‘bi’ or ‘pan’, but rather as yet another…

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Vesper H.

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October 12, 2013

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September 23, 2016
Q&A

Q&A: “Would you mind explaining how you feel in regards to your bi identity?”

June 28, 2016 / 1 Comment

anonymous said: I have a question. I saw your post about how you find it a but annoying that people either assume you’re bisexual or bi romantic, when you always just say bi. And I’ll admit that since you are also asexual my first reaction was to assume you were biromantic, I’m sorry. But it confuses me a little. Would you mind explaining how you feel in regards to your bi identity? It’s okay if you don’t want to! I’m just trying to understand (in response to this post) first off, even though i felt a need to vent about it because it is annoying, i want to point out that i’m not offended or angry when someone misreads my bi identity, especially if they’re understanding when/if i correct them. there are so many reasons why a person would automatically read “bi” as either bisexual or biromantic that it almost…

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Vesper H.

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“the ace community goes overboard with words?” i.e. word vomitted “nah”
April 5, 2018

Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”
February 23, 2016
Q&A, Queer[ness], YouTube[r]

Q&A: “I have some questions about your YouTube stuff.”

June 28, 2016 / No Comments

anonymous said: Hey Vesper! I have some questions about your YouTube stuff. Feel free to get to this as you feel like, no rush! What are the biggest differences between discussing LGBT+ stuff on tumblr vs on YouTube? Who are some other LGBT+ vloggers that you enjoy? And do you have any advice you’d give to other people considering vlogging about LGBT+ topics and their identities? hi! i’m flattered that you’re interested in my answer to these questions. apologies in advance for the length and if my responses aren’t even helpful. “What are the biggest differences between discussing LGBT+ stuff on tumblr vs on YouTube?” the big differences between the two platforms make for big differences in the way discussions unfold and how one even goes about initiating a discussion, imho. i feel like it’s much easier to have discussions on Tumblr and the discussions that i have here are…

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Vesper H.

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“the ace community goes overboard with words?” i.e. word vomitted “nah”
April 5, 2018

Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”
February 23, 2016
Feedback, Japan[ese]

Feedback: “I think a good translation for お疲れ様 is “Good work”?”

June 27, 2016 /

anonymous said: Ty for your ace posts. I think a good translation for お疲れ様 is “Good work”? as I see that that usually matches most contexts. And also, お疲れ様 to you too for your work on ace activism. I appreciate it. it can be translated as “good work,” definitely. it’s just that that translation still lacks some of the nuances that i wish i could convey in English… sigh! either way, いいえ、こちらこそお疲れ様でした。thanks, but also same to you (and everyone else out there). 🙂

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Vesper H.

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Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”
February 23, 2016
[A]sexuality, Black[ness], Gender[queer], Mental [Un]health, Queer[ness], YouTube[r]

Re: QAC 51 – #ProudToBe Black Non-Binary Bi Pan AND Asexual

June 23, 2016 / 1 Comment

ah, i had the most amusing day today, getting notifications on my phone for the comments left on this video. i’m not even pissed off anymore, it’s now become hilarious. people are saying that 4chan is behind the spam / hate attack on the #ProudToBe spotlight / hashtag and somehow that just makes it even more hilarious to me. i’m so amused that i felt like screencapping some of the 66 comments i’ve gotten on the video so far. trigger warning for pretty much any and everything. please respect your triggers. don’t read any further if you aren’t in a place where you can laugh at all this hate with me. me: *every time i got a notification on my phone today* this is when my apathy-fortified wall of No Fucks Given seems like a really awesome coping mechanism because it allows me to brush off / laugh off otherwise…

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Vesper H.

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October 16, 2016

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Re: “”Visibility””
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[A]sexuality, [Random] Thoughts, Queer[ness]

that feel when

June 23, 2016 / 1 Comment

everyone outside of the ace community automatically reads your bi identity as ‘bisexual’ and everyone within the ace community automatically reads your bi identity as ‘biromantic’ because everyone assumes forgets that a person can just simply be bi or that there’s more to a person’s sexuality than just -sexual / -romantic.

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Vesper H.

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[A]sexuality, Gender[queer], Queer[ness], YouTube[r]

QAC 51 – #ProudToBe Black Non-Binary Bi Pan AND Asexual

June 22, 2016 / 1 Comment

for those who don’t know, YouTube is currently spotlighting videos by LGBTQIA creators expressing their Pride in who they are using the #ProudToBe hashtag. i thought i’d jump on the bandwagon and add some encouraging words and visibility / representation for people like me. as the video description says, YouTube joined forces with many popular LGBTQIA content creators on its site to release the #ProudToBe spotlight today. inspired by others’ videos, but also pissed off by the public’s response to the hashtag / spotlight, i decided to make this impromptu video upon getting home from work. it’s not great, but might as well throw my face out there too, eh? as i mentioned, the public’s response to the hashtag / spotlight has been especially severe… trolls have been out in force like never before, spamming everything from the comments section of YouTube’s spotlight video itself to the comment sections of literally…

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Vesper H.

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Feedback, Gender[queer], Q&A, Queer[ness]

Feedback: “I just want to say I found some of your videos on YouTube and some of them have really resonated with me…”

June 21, 2016 /

anonymous said: I just want to say I found some of your videos on YouTube and some of them have really resonated with me. I’ve always identified as bi, and was identifying as neutrois but sort of on the fence about it being the right term, and upon watching one of your videos awhile ago explaining your experience while identifying as neutrois and why you coined maverique, I’ve started to realize maverique may fit me better as well. So yeah, I just want to say thanks for doing what you do, and say keep doing it! thanks for not only watching my videos, but also for taking the time out of your day to come and send me this really nice message, anon. i appreciate the feedback & encouragement and am honored to hear that my neutrois / maverique video resonated with you. 🙂 keep being awesome yourself!

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Vesper H.

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Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”
February 23, 2016