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Queer As Cat

gender・ sexuality・ race ・intersectionality

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  • Home
  • About
    • About QAC
    • About Vesper
  • Photos
    • Instagram
    • Tokyo Rainbow Pride
      • 2014
      • 2015
      • 2016
      • 2017
      • 2018
  • Resources
    • Asexual POC Resources
    • #LGBTQIA in Japan
  • Contact

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This Is Fine.

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July 14, 2018

“love languages”?? communication tool.

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May 1, 2019

Burnt Out & Neurotic: The Toll of Blogging While Ace and Mentally Ill

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December 26, 2018

QAC 73 – 【Asexuality In JAPAN】An Interview ♠【アセクシャルって?】日本x英語圏  || #AAW2018

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October 26, 2018

allo by default: hypocrisy in “aspec” spaces

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February 25, 2017
  • [A]sexuality,  [Random] Thoughts

    sigh.

    February 24, 2016 / No Comments

    …so now i’m being accused of “attacking the [alterous] community as a whole” because i pointed out the overlapping usage of two concepts/terms and expressed concern over how things are being worded/conceived by some people while being “non aro” and “non alterous”. great. i love how the responsibility is being put on me to go to their askboxes and explain my feelings / view and that i’m being faulted for expressing my feelings on my own blog without coming to them personally instead. as if i have the time or responsibility to go to the askboxes of blogs every time i feel some kinda way about something. and then when one of them does reach out to me privately, there’s more ‘you’re not aro so stop talking.’ all of that aside, i do not understand how they are unable to see how off-putting they’re being. if i was at all leaning towards using alterous for…

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    Vesper H.

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    …one of many examples of why navigating セクマイ / LGBTQIA spaces in Japan can be painful at times.

    October 7, 2016

    Black Mirror: “San Junipero”

    July 6, 2017

    …so this happened at TRP today.

    May 7, 2016
  • [A]sexuality,  Feedback,  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”

    February 23, 2016 /

    anonymous said: Hi, I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing–I’m aroflux, have a qpp and’ve been miffed about the same things. Like, it’s great the term exists, but I feel invalidated by many promotions of it. Love’s not a binary. yeah… i wish people would think of attractions more like this: instead of isolating certain types of attraction and positioning them on a linear scale or even spectrum, as people often do. that said, the above is the 15min product of my sleep deprived brain functioning after 3am on 4hrs of sleep. it’s not thought out and thus is full of holes and problems, so please don’t take it too seriously zzz… edit: someone asked me to define these types of attraction, so i gave it a shot. disclaimer: please bear in mind that these are my own personal definitions as of now (2.24.2016).…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    QAC 24 – Labels: Why They’re Important + Why I Use Them

    March 17, 2014

    QAC 31 – Relationships… Meh.

    November 17, 2014

    QAC 13 – Staying In The Closet

    August 11, 2013
  • [A]sexuality,  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A: “I’m starting to wonder if maybe I’m bisexual, or biromantic?”

    February 23, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: I’m having a hard time lately. I have been trying online dating for awhile (tinder etc. guys only) and am finding I get bored really fast and have no interest to carry on conversations or meet up – maybe I just have no desire to date right now. Lately I’ve also been noticing that when I go out I tend to notice the girls in the room before the guys. I’m starting to wonder if maybe I’m bisexual, or biromantic? How do you know the difference between that and just appreciating people who look nice? personally, if i’m experiencing aesthetic attraction (ie. in admiration of someone’s looks), it’s very similar to being in admiration of anything else. i love their sense of style or their overall look and that may trigger the desire to approach them and compliment them, but the admiration or attraction ends there if that’s…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    Cosmopolitan: “Everything You Need To Know About Demisexuality”

    March 20, 2017

    ?Tokyo Rainbow Pride 2017: Parade & Ace Meetup

    April 29, 2017

    them gay enbian feels

    October 16, 2016
  • [A]sexuality,  [Random] Thoughts

    usage of “alterous” vs “platonic” in aro discourse

    February 22, 2016 / 3 Comments

    i hesitate to post this at all*, but i’ve been casually mulling it over for a little while now and am getting no where in keeping this to myself, so here goes nothing… there’s a relatively new word going around on Tumblr: alterous.

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    tfw TERFs.

    March 1, 2017

    *scribble scribble*

    September 15, 2016

    Ace & Non-binary Pride @Tokyo Rainbow Pride 2015 (04/26/15)

    May 10, 2015
  • Feedback

    Feedback: “I JUST WATCHED YOUR GENDER TAG VIDEO AND ????????”

    February 16, 2016 /

    anonymous said: I JUST WATCHED YOUR GENDER TAG VIDEO AND ???????? I’M MAVERIQUE AND ACE TOO AND JUST ?????????????? HOW DID THIS HAPPEN WHAT IS THIS MAGIC just yeah I got really excited and wanted to say hey (also is the black ring you’re wearing in it an ace ring or something else?) hi! thanks for watching and stopping by. it is cool that we have those things in common. 🙂 the black ring that i wear on my right middle finger is an ace ring to me, yes. 🙂 although i must admit that i have a thing for rings and the color black in general, so i’d probably be wearing it even if i wasn’t ace lol…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”

    February 23, 2016
  • [A]sexuality,  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A not Q&A: “I’ve heard of heteroflexible and gayflexible which means…”

    February 14, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: For the anon looking for a word / term: I’ve heard of heteroflexible and gayflexible which means you’re usually attracted to the other / same gender but sometimes also the same / other gender. I could also imagine biflexible and so on… (in response to this anon) heteroflexible and homoflexible (i’ve never heard of gayflexible nor biflexible) are words that i’m familiar with, but they’re also words that i personally don’t care to suggest to people. for one, the way i’ve seen these words defined and used seems problematic to me. let’s look at their definitions, for example. Heteroflexibility is a form of a sexual orientation or situational sexual behavior characterized by minimal homosexual activity in an otherwise primarily heterosexual orientation that is considered to distinguish it from bisexuality. (Wikipedia) [Homoflexiblity] describes someone attracted primarily to members of the same sex (homosexual), but occasionally attracted to members of the…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    landscapes and fissures: navigating ace terminology in Japanese & English

    June 1, 2018

    IF {subcommunity building} THEN {…?}

    March 11, 2019

    more Sailor Moon Crystal fanpersoning #SCREAMING

    May 17, 2016
  • Black[ness],  Gender[queer],  Queer[ness],  YouTube[r]

    QAC 46 – “Race / Gender Doesn’t Exist!” | The Argument of Social Constructs

    February 11, 2016 / No Comments

    all too often i see people making appeals to science— more specifically biology — to try and legitimize their argument that race, gender or whatever else doesn’t really exist. in fact, i come across such arguments so often that such arguments have become a pet peeve of mine. so yeah, you can bet i got really angry when someone recently tried to justify doing blackface to me with “but race is a social construct and doesn’t exist anyway. we’re all the same race— the human race!” and was praised by thousands for her “bravery.” *drops the “angry black person” mic*

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    fuck your Oppression Olympics

    September 15, 2016

    it began with locs…

    February 25, 2018

    QAC 39 – Biromantic + Panromantic Pride! | Being Both Bi & Pan

    September 23, 2015
  • [A]sexuality,  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A: “Is there a specific term for being primarily and largely attracted to a gender and…”

    February 11, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: Is there a specific term for being primarily and largely attracted to a gender, and experiencing occasional attraction to an additional gender? i’m afraid i don’t know of a word for this… perhaps my followers do? i think that there are many people who identify as lesbian, gay, bi, pan etc who would love for such a word to exist so that they could more readily describe their attraction…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    …mmm, so.

    March 24, 2017

    Ie Uru Onna Gyakushuu S2E3: “A home that is accepting of all [kinds of] love?!”

    January 24, 2019

    QAC 48 – Non-Binary Gender Norms & (A)sexuality: Yeah, No.

    March 27, 2016
  • Gender[queer],  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A: “How do you know you’re maverique?”

    February 9, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: How do you know you’re maverique? Because I don’t know how to have a sense of this gender nor do I have anyone to talk to about. hi, anon. 🙂 i think this post pretty much answers your question, but also check out this post where i respond to someone else who is trying to get a sense of their own gender. i know it can be really tough not having anyone to talk to about something like this, but you’re not alone! i know that talking to strangers on the internet isn’t the same as actually sitting down and talking to someone, but the internet can still be a great place to start meeting people with whom you can talk to about something like this. hell, you’re already here talking to me about it. 🙂 i’m more than happy to lend a ear and help if i…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    GENDER.

    February 16, 2014

    QAC 62 – The Road To HRT: Fears, Goals & Compromise || Non-Binary || The T Files #002

    December 11, 2017

    Huffpost: “When The World Doesn’t Know You Exist: Coming Out As Non-Binary”

    October 30, 2016
  • Q&A

    Q&A: “is it ever okay to ask someone what their biological sex is?”

    February 4, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: sorry if this is a stupid question but is it ever okay to ask someone what their biological sex is? like maybe if you’re close enough or they’re open enough and you’re just curious or whatever would that be acceptable or is it considered rude? there is no “yes” or “no” answer to this question. how a person will feel about a personal question like that is entirely dependent upon the the person being asked, the relationship that the asker has with that person and the context within which the question is being asked, among other things. ultimately such information is none of anyone else’s business and it’s up to the person being asked to decide if they feel like disclosing such information to you. if for some reason you feel like you cannot keep such a question to yourself, the best you can do is ask as politely and…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    “the ace community goes overboard with words?” i.e. word vomitted “nah”

    April 5, 2018

    Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”

    February 23, 2016
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VESPER H.

YouTuber & Blogger

Queer As Cat is the blog and YouTube channel of Vesper, an American expat currently living in Japan.
reoccurring topics include: #asexuality, #nonbinary, #queerness #blackness & #mentalhealth

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Recent Posts

  • literal “social distancing” from the ace community April 1, 2020
  • legalized weed in America: one of many chips on my Black shoulder March 7, 2020
  • willpower, sweat, and tears January 30, 2020
  • 🎬 QAC 79 – The Neverending Queer-y: My Queer Ace Journey || LGBT YouTube & COPPA January 4, 2020
  • #YouTubeIsOverParty: COPPA & The Hypocrisy of YouTube December 15, 2019

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