genderqueer Archives | Page 2 of 7 | Queer As Cat

Gender[queer], Q&A, Queer[ness]

Q&A: “…does anyone ever talk about how jobs can limit one’s choices for gender presentation?”

February 21, 2017 / No Comments

anonymous said: Concerning being either GNC or nonbinary, does anyone ever talk about how jobs can limit one’s choices for gender presentation? I’m in hard science, which tends to have much stricter standards of “professional presentation” (and thus gender-performance), than the humanities. I couldn’t get away with half of the presentation stuff that people on Tumblr endlessly espouse if I want to actually get a job in my chosen field, which is then used as proof that I’m a faker and trend-follower. unfortunately i don’t have any links on hand to offer you, but i have seen many people both online and offline talk about the limitations (or even complete inability) that they face regarding being able to present themselves in a way that reflects their gender (or lack thereof)– both in regards to on the job and as a student because of standards re: “professionalism”. especially here in Japan…

continue reading

Vesper H.

You May Also Like

QAC 62 – The Road To HRT: Fears, Goals & Compromise || Non-Binary || The T Files #002
December 11, 2017

🎬 QAC 79 – The Neverending Queer-y: My Queer Ace Journey || LGBT YouTube & COPPA
January 4, 2020

GENDER.
February 16, 2014
[Random] Thoughts, Gender[queer], Queer[ness]

word vomit: escaping womanhood

February 10, 2017 / No Comments

time to word vomit a continuous stream of thoughts that have been going around in my head for a while now. will probably run with this more later. cw: slurs the binarist society(/ies) we live in fucks over everyone– be they trans or not– with its enforcement of binary gender roles, among other things. sometimes i’ll come across an article, blog post, whatever talking about this. to a point. sometimes it will be pointed out that how and to what extent society polices and enforces gender roles differs based on the assumed gender at birth of the person in question, among other things. that in American society, for example, people deemed to be females at birth are afforded a certain amount of leeway that people who are deemed to be male at birth are not.

continue reading

Vesper H.

You May Also Like

“”two genders””
December 30, 2016

allo by default: hypocrisy in “aspec” spaces
February 25, 2017

re: gaslighting in the aftermath of the 2016 US presidential election
November 19, 2016
Q&A

Q&A: “To me I’m just a person. Is that what [maverique] is like?”

January 16, 2017 / No Comments

curvycutieteenybopper said: I just found your gender identity and I think it fits me? I’m not a boy or girl. There’s something but it’s not based off of boy or girl. To me I’m just a person. Is that what it’s like? How does it differ from non binary as an identity? Thank you normally i’d respond to this with some long-winded blabbering, but i just wrote another long-winded blabber of a post and am out of wind now, so… forgive me for keeping this (relatively) brief. i think that you’ll find that many people, regardless of their gender, view themselves as “just a person” or “just themself”, so i personally don’t consider that to be something specific to maveriques. not everyone feels like their gender defines them in a way that stops them from being “just” themself, a person, and simultaneously a man, woman, agender person etc at the same time……

continue reading

Vesper H.

You May Also Like

Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”
February 23, 2016

“the ace community goes overboard with words?” i.e. word vomitted “nah”
April 5, 2018
Gender[queer], Q&A, Queer[ness]

Q&A: “I was wondering when/how did you figure out you weren’t a woman?”

January 5, 2017 / No Comments

anonymous said: HI! I like your blog. I’m pretty new around here though. Still trying to understand gender stuff. I was wondering when/how did you figure out you weren’t a woman? hi, anon, and thanks. 🙂 i’m not sure that my own personal experience will be of any help to you, but… the short answer: i never felt like i was a girl / woman to begin with, but at the same time i knew that i wasn’t a boy / man. i defaulted to society’s gender assignment because of not knowing that i could do or be anything else. i told myself, “well, i’m not a boy / man, so i guess that makes me the tomboy that people say i am.” however, the second i became aware of the fact that a person could be neither a boy / man nor a girl / woman, that being genderqueer (at the…

continue reading

Vesper H.

You May Also Like

ARTICLE: “Why Transgender People In Japan Prefer To Be Told They Have A “Disorder””
August 17, 2016

QAC 47 – Re: “Transitioning” in Japan / Body Mods & Dysphoria || Tea & Word Vomit
February 28, 2016

fuck your Oppression Olympics
September 15, 2016
Gender[queer], Q&A, Queer[ness]

Q&A: “i’m trans and there are a lot of times when i feel hopeless…”

November 14, 2016 / No Comments

anonymous said: this sounds dumb but i really wonder about – i’m trans and there are a lot of times when i feel hopeless, like i will never be totally validated and accepted like cis people are even if i completely transition (sometimes i even wish i was cis so i wouldn’t have to deal with the things i feel). occasionally i wonder if maybe i really am faking it even though it’s been a couple years since i realized that being trans felt right. am i the only one who has these thoughts? am i faking it? i can tell you with 100% certainty that you’re not the only one who has such thoughts and who feels this way at times, anon. it’s not at all uncommon to feel hopeless sometimes; to wish that you were like those around you who do not have to deal with the things…

continue reading

Vesper H.

You May Also Like

thank you
November 28, 2017

QAC 22 – LGBTQ J-Magazines: Garçon Girls + Novia Novia
February 10, 2014

fuck your Oppression Olympics
September 15, 2016
When The World Doesn’t Know You Exist: Coming Out As Non-Binary

Gender[queer], Queer[ness]

Huffpost: “When The World Doesn’t Know You Exist: Coming Out As Non-Binary”

October 30, 2016 / No Comments

Life would be easier if it came with a guidebook. If it did, maybe it wouldn’t have taken me 27 years to realise that I didn’t actually have to subscribe to society’s assertion that everyone is either male or female. At the very least, ripping the book to shreds in a fit of rage would have made for great stress relief. Then again, had there been such a book I probably wouldn’t have grown up to be the person that I am today and I wouldn’t change that for the world. Hello, my name’s Vesper. I’m a 31 year old non-binary person who’s here today to tell you that gender is a much more beautifully complex thing than society would have you believe. That some people, such as myself, are neither male nor female but a different gender(s) entirely […] the blog post that i wrote for Ditch The Label…

continue reading

Vesper H.

You May Also Like

QAC 53 – The Trans/Cis Binary | Non-Binary vs Trans Identity | Let’s Talk
August 19, 2016

GENDER.
February 16, 2014

QAC 65 – 1 Month on Low Dose HRT | Non-Binary | Mental Health || The T Files #005
February 12, 2018
"Gender is a Much More Beautifully Complex Thing Than Society Would Have You Believe"- Ditch the Label

Gender[queer], Queer[ness]

“Gender is a Much More Beautifully Complex Thing Than Society Would Have You Believe”- Ditch the Label

October 18, 2016 / No Comments

Life would be easier if it came with a guidebook. If it did, maybe it wouldn’t have taken me 27 years to realize that I didn’t actually have to subscribe to society’s assertion that everyone is either male or female. At the very least, ripping the book to shreds in a fit of rage would have made for great stress relief. Then again, had there been such a book I probably wouldn’t have grown up to be the person that I am today and I wouldn’t change that for the world. Hello, my name’s Vesper. I’m a 31 year old non-binary person who’s here today to tell you that gender is a much more beautifully complex thing than society would have you believe. That some people, such as myself, are neither male nor female but a different gender(s) entirely. […] when @ditchthelabel, an international anti-bullying charity, approached me about writing…

continue reading

Vesper H.

You May Also Like

AskAPan Week 06 – “Genderblind”ness (+DOMA comments)
June 28, 2013

gender feels; racial trauma.
December 6, 2017

QAC 54 – Confusing Gender Envy & Admiration with Attraction || Non-Binary | Asexual
October 10, 2016
[A]sexuality, Gender[queer], Japan[ese], Q&A, Queer[ness]

Re: Re: “Why do you think some nb genders are becoming more well known than other nb genders?”

September 14, 2016 / No Comments

nextstepcake: queerascat: nextstepcake: queerascat: anonymous said: Hey Vesper! I have a question. I’ve noticed that within the nonbinary and larger trans and queer and so forth communities, some nonbinary genders seem to get more recognition than others. Some- especially maverique as I’ve noticed- are hardly known of by many other nonbinary and/or trans people, while others such are gaining recognition in trans, nb, and other circles much more quickly in comparison. Why do you think some nb genders are becoming more well known than other nb genders? hi anon, this is a really tough question. not just because of how subjective it is (i mean, what even counts as ‘recognition’, let alone what counts as ‘more’ or ‘more quickly’), but also because there are an infinite number of factors involved in why any non-binary gender gets any amount of recognition at all. imho, some non-binary genders are more commonly recognized…

continue reading

Vesper H.

You May Also Like

AskAPan Week 06 – “Genderblind”ness (+DOMA comments)
June 28, 2013

“You are freaking perfect how you are.”
June 19, 2018

AskAPan Week 07 – Family responses to the LGBTQ community
July 5, 2013
Gender[queer], Q&A

Q&A not Q&A: “I’m a female androgyne & clothes are a problem for me.”

September 6, 2016 / No Comments

anonymous said: Hi. I really like your style. I’m a female androgyne & clothes are a problem for me. I’m skinny & short & I like men’s clothes but they don’t fit me because they are all too big for me. So I hate how I look like. I see pictures on the internet with beautiful women wearing great men’s clothes, they are divine but where I live there’s not a single shop for genderqueer. When I’m trying to tell this to someone, girls are telling me that with my body I can wear what I want. Yes… in a shop for women thanks, anon. 🙂 i totally share your frustration when it comes to shopping for clothes…. i, too, prefer clothes that tend to be in “men’s” sections. i’m also (very) short and have more curves than i care to admit… that, combined with how selective and uncompromising i…

continue reading

Vesper H.

You May Also Like

“”two genders””
December 30, 2016

QAC 30 – Gender Expression / Presentation Blurb
October 28, 2014

パレードの皆さん、お疲れ
April 26, 2015
Gender[queer], Queer[ness]

let’s talk: the trans/cis binary

August 19, 2016 / 1 Comment

note: this post is also a YouTube video, which was made in response to commentary made on another video about identifying as non-binary but not trans. you may want to watch the latter video before reading this. let’s talk about gender. let’s talk how you may or may not be aware of the false binary or dichotomy of male / female gender and how it erases non-binary people. then, let’s talk about how that isn’t the only binary that exists involving gender and identity. let’s talk about how even if a non-binary person manages to navigate the male / female gender binary within society and exist openly as a non-binary person, they’re then faced with yet another binary, another dichotomy from within the very communities that they should at least be able to feel safer in. let’s talk about how within the LGBTQIA there is / are: questionnaires, registration forms,…

continue reading

Vesper H.

You May Also Like

QAC 40 – The Gender Tag! | Maverique
October 12, 2015

QAC 26 – Gender Dysphoria: It’s Complicated. (a rant)
June 30, 2014

QAC 05 – Gender Blurb: Neutrois?
May 29, 2013