gender identity Archives | Page 2 of 6 | Queer As Cat

When The World Doesn’t Know You Exist: Coming Out As Non-Binary

Gender[queer], Queer[ness]

Huffpost: “When The World Doesn’t Know You Exist: Coming Out As Non-Binary”

October 30, 2016 / No Comments

Life would be easier if it came with a guidebook. If it did, maybe it wouldn’t have taken me 27 years to realise that I didn’t actually have to subscribe to society’s assertion that everyone is either male or female. At the very least, ripping the book to shreds in a fit of rage would have made for great stress relief. Then again, had there been such a book I probably wouldn’t have grown up to be the person that I am today and I wouldn’t change that for the world. Hello, my name’s Vesper. I’m a 31 year old non-binary person who’s here today to tell you that gender is a much more beautifully complex thing than society would have you believe. That some people, such as myself, are neither male nor female but a different gender(s) entirely […] the blog post that i wrote for Ditch The Label…

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Vesper H.

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Q&A

Q&A: “do you happen to know of a gender label/type that could be described loosely as…”

October 22, 2016 / No Comments

lymeandcoconut said: Hi there. I just started following you so I apologize if you’ve already addressed this, but do you happen to know of a gender label/type that could be described loosely as “I feel like at my core I’m agender, but I wear a female/male ‘suit'”? It’s hard to put into words, but I feel as if female is an outfit I wear, a role I play, but who I am underneath is agender. Have you heard of something like that? i’m afraid that i haven’t come across a gender that fits the description of what you’re looking for. i have seen people talk about “performing” a gender that differs from their actual gender (for example, an agender person who considers themself to “perform” the socially defined role of “female” in their day-to-day life), but i generally see that “performance” treated as separate from a person’s actual gender rather than…

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Vesper H.

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"Gender is a Much More Beautifully Complex Thing Than Society Would Have You Believe"- Ditch the Label

Gender[queer], Queer[ness]

“Gender is a Much More Beautifully Complex Thing Than Society Would Have You Believe”- Ditch the Label

October 18, 2016 / No Comments

Life would be easier if it came with a guidebook. If it did, maybe it wouldn’t have taken me 27 years to realize that I didn’t actually have to subscribe to society’s assertion that everyone is either male or female. At the very least, ripping the book to shreds in a fit of rage would have made for great stress relief. Then again, had there been such a book I probably wouldn’t have grown up to be the person that I am today and I wouldn’t change that for the world. Hello, my name’s Vesper. I’m a 31 year old non-binary person who’s here today to tell you that gender is a much more beautifully complex thing than society would have you believe. That some people, such as myself, are neither male nor female but a different gender(s) entirely. […] when @ditchthelabel, an international anti-bullying charity, approached me about writing…

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Vesper H.

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Gender[queer], Q&A, Queer[ness]

Q&A: “Would it be possible for someone to identify as maverique & neutrois?”

October 14, 2016 / No Comments

anonymous said: Would it be possible for someone to identify as maverique & neutrois? Or would that person have to identify as either the latter or the former? yes, a person can be both maverique and neutrois. there are no rules or limitations as to what a person can be or how a person can identify. if someone is maverique and neutrois, there’s no reason why they couldn’t identify as maverique and neutrois.

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Vesper H.

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Feedback, Gender[queer], Q&A, Queer[ness]

Feedback: “I really want to thank you for introducing me to the term “maverique” because…”

October 14, 2016 /

anonymous said: I really want to thank you for introducing me to the term “maverique” because I think I’ve found something that describes me in a way. I’ve always felt like I wasn’t a boy or a girl, and that I was simply just myself. A person. So now I’m glad to have found a term that describes that. ;v; Thank you so much. being maverique, someone with a distinct gender that is independent from both male and female gender can be tough! everyone regardless of gender is just being themself, a person, but when you don’t even have a word to conceptualize your gender with because everything else is tied to male and / or female…. yeah. glad you found a word that works for you, anon. 🙂

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Vesper H.

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Q&A: “I’m the anon reading lexicons in order to find a word…”

August 2, 2016 /

anonymous said: I’m the anon reading lexicons in order to find a word to describe myself. Thank you very much for taking so much time for me, for your long, very interesting and helpful answer. In fact, I was only looking for a single word because everybody here seems to have one (they say ‘hi I’m this or that’) and it was driving me crazy that there wasn’t one for me. I thought everyone but me had a word that suited completely. You put my mind at ease. You’re right I should find my own combination of words. (re: this post) no problem, anon. thanks for coming back and responding. 🙂 even though it may feel like everyone has a particular word / identity / label that describes them completely, rest assured that that totally is not the case. not everyone is able to (or even wants to) put a…

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Vesper H.

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Q&A

Q&A: “I think I’m a cis girl but I’ve discovered that I don’t mind if someone would call me by other pronouns…”

August 1, 2016 / No Comments

anonymous said: Hey 🙂 I think I’m a cis girl but I’ve discovered that I don’t mind if someone would call me by other pronouns than she/her or call me a dude or something. On some days I feel more masculine and I feel more feminine. Is that “normal”? i’m a strong believer in there being no such thing as “normal” and that what most people consider to be “normal” is really just “common”, but anyway… is that common among cis girls? i’m afraid that i have no idea. based on what i’ve heard, i wouldn’t say that it’s uncommon. then again, i’d also like to point out that whether it’s common or not says nothing about your gender anyway. everyone, regardless of whether they’re cis, trans and / or non-binary, has their own unique relationship with and feelings about the language used to refer to them and how they feel about their…

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Vesper H.

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Q&A: “I am having trouble with my gender, and am looking for some advice?”

June 12, 2016 / No Comments

anonymous said: I am having trouble with my gender, and am looking for some advice? I was AFAB, but was stuck in a disgustingly misogynistic environment from the time I was 9 (19 now) until just a few months ago. For the past several years, I’ve had a strong aversion to anything stereotypically seen as “female,” and experienced a lot of issues with the way my body is seen. I’ve tried using every other pronoun set and gender I can think of, and none of them make me feel any better. I don’t know what to do. if you don’t had any animosity or otherwise negative feelings towards your name, you could ask people to always refer to you by your name instead of pronouns. some people prefer to go by their name until they find a pronoun that feels right to them and others go by their name indefinitely,…

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Vesper H.

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Q&A: “…would it be correct to suppose that Maverique is on a spectrum of its own, with two opposite ends…?”

June 2, 2016 / No Comments

anonymous said: Hey Vesper. I have a thought. What if Maverique is its own unique gender the way that the four temperaments are each distinct, being two pairs of opposites but not excluding the other pair. Like for instance sanguines are the opposite of melancholy, but that does not exclude the existance of cholerics and phlegmatics. Type A and Type B are not the only two personality types but they are opposites. Temperament is not a one-dimensional thing like a spectrum between two types. To elaborate on my thoughts. If Maverique is a gender outside of the masculine-feminine spectrum, then would it be correct to suppose that Maverique is on a spectrum of its own, with two opposite ends, just like sanguine and melancholy temperaments are on a spectrum separate from Choleric and phlegmatic? The way I want to illustrate my supposition is as follows: let’s say that maverique is…

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Vesper H.

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Q&A: “I’m trying to understand the differences between maverique, agender, gender neutral, and neutrois.”

May 25, 2016 / No Comments

anonymous said: I’m trying to understand the differences between maverique, agender, gender neutral, and neutrois. What does being a maverique feel like to you and how does it differ from the other terms? I know what these terms MEAN, but not how these genders are EXPERIENCED. everyone has their own unique experience with gender, so there is no one “maverique experience”, “agender experience”, etc. what being maverique feels like to me isn’t necessarily going to match how other maveriques feel. that disclaimer aside, some links that may help you: “maverique: why i coined the word” – where i talk about why i stopped identifying as neutrois, how being maverique feels to me and how that differs from being gender neutral or genderless. “goodbye neutrois, hello maverique” – video version of the above “how is maverique distinct from agender?” – where i respond to an ask about the difference between being…

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Vesper H.

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