exclusion Archives | Queer As Cat

[A]sexuality, Q&A, Queer[ness]

Q&A: “…”love wins/love is love” can be kind of alienating…”

September 19, 2017 / No Comments

anonymous said: I just had a eureka moment when looking at your recent reblog of a post on how “love wins/love is love” can be kind of alienating… As an aro ace, the whole “love” angle is definitely implicitly exclusionary. The core of my being aro ace is that I DON’T love anyone That Way, and community rhetoric consistently fails to reflect that. Not to mention that I find the “twoo wuv” thing eye-roll-inducing at times. Your thoughts? ( re: this post ) i agree that in addition to ignoring, excluding and / or alienating trans and non-binary people, as pointed out in the OP, such rhetoric also ignores, excludes and alienates those for whom “love” (be it in the traditional, romantic sense or at all) is not a thing– or at least, is not The Thing that defines their connection to the LGBTQIA community. such rhetoric posits love as some…

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Vesper H.

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Q&A: “what do you think about asexuality and the LGBTQ community today?”

November 7, 2016 / No Comments

aro-probably-ace-ravenclaw said: Hi, Vesper! As my url says, I’m somewhere in the ace spectrum. I saw your video about asexuality and the LGBTQ community, and I need to ask: what do you think about it today? Something change? hi! thanks for watching the video and for asking. while i would change some things about that video if i were to redo it today, the gist of what i said in those 16 minutes of blabbering remains true today and can be summarized by what i said @3:58: my personal stance on [asexuals being part of the LGBTQ community] is that anyone who feels that they are queer, anyone who identifies with the word ‘queer’, anyone who identifies as being part of the LGBTQ community has every right to identify as such. and those who do not feel like they identify with such a community or that they want themselves associated…

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Vesper H.

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Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”
February 23, 2016

“the ace community goes overboard with words?” i.e. word vomitted “nah”
April 5, 2018
[A]sexuality, Q&A, Queer[ness]

Q&A not Q&A: “They don’t face opression at all is what I believe.”

March 23, 2016 / No Comments

anonymous said: They don’t face opression at all is what I believe. I don’t think it’s about ((enough)) I think it’s about being opressed at all and they aren’t. They face a stigma and I’ll call that shit out when I see it but, I don’t think it’s opression at all? Idk just my opinion. i understand that that’s your opinion, but i’m not sure what you want me to say? like i’ve said before, imho whether heteroromantic aces face oppression or not is beside the point. my stance on whether they have the right to identify as a part of the LGBTQIA+ community remains a firm “yes” because like i said, oppression isn’t the determining factor for me. if you’re looking for me to take a stance on whether heteroromantic aces face oppression at all or whether what they face is stigma, i’m afraid i’m not going to give you…

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Vesper H.

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Q&A: “I’ve seen some people claim the ace community is racist, transphobic, and that hetero-romantic and aromantic aces don’t belong in the LGBTQ+ community…”

March 20, 2016 / No Comments

anonymous said: So, I’ve seen some people claim the ace community is racist, transphobic, and that hetero-romantic and aromantic aces don’t belong in the LGBTQ+ community. I was wondering, do you think there’s racism in the ace community? I’ve never noticed any, but then I’m white, so that’s not rlly my call. I think maybe it has to do with the use of the term allosexual, which has been said to have racist and transphobic roots. What’s your opinion on “allosexual”, and do you think “het aces” shld be included in the LGBTQ+ community? there are racist (and transphobic) people everywhere and the ace community is no exception to that. however, there being racist (and transphobic) people in the ace community doesn’t make the entire community racist (or transphobic). that would be an overgeneralization. people have made the claim that the term allosexual is racist and/or transphobic, but i…

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Vesper H.

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Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”
February 23, 2016

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Q&A: “I’ve just seen a lot of discussion on my dash about straight cis ace/aro’s not belonging in the LGBT+ space…”

August 27, 2015 / No Comments

anonymous said: Hi Vesper! Hope you’re well. I’ve just seen a lot of discussion on my dash about straight cis ace/aro’s not belonging in the LGBT+ space because it’s “not for them” (I’m Ace but not straight) and I found it really disheartening how so many people (Who are part of LGBT) agreed that they didn’t belong w/o listening to actual ace/aro people. To me it sounds like they want to drop the “A” altogether. I was just wondering what your thoughts are? Thanks. hi anon! sorry for taking so long to respond to your ask. sadly, people saying crap like this is nothing new. it is incredibly disheartening how people within the LGBT (and ace) community(ies) are so quick to police others’ identities. you’d think that people who have had their own identities policed wouldn’t rehash the same shit onto others, but no. everyone wants to host an…

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Vesper H.

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Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”
February 23, 2016
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QAC 28 – On “Blackness”, Queer Identity & Intersectionality (a rant)

July 14, 2014 / No Comments

i’m all over the place in this video. i rant about my personal experiences with the policing that takes place within the black community, concepts of “blackness” (and in turn, “whitewashing”) in the black community, being a black asexual, fears of transitioning as a black non-binary person, being black abroad and intersectionality, to varying degrees. i’m sure i’ll get ill feelings directed at me for some of the feelings and views expressed in this video, but whatever. my feelings and experiences are what they are and they needed to be (and deserve to be) expressed. that said, got your own personal experiences with race/ethnicity and sexuality/gender that you’d like to share? i’d love to hear about them. 🙂 sigh! this is why i don’t generally talk about this kind of stuff. “too much feels”…

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Vesper H.

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QAC 31 – Relationships… Meh.
November 17, 2014
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QAC 16 – Asexuality and the LGBTQ Community

September 9, 2013 / No Comments

======= NAVIGATION BELOW ======= @00:00 – Disclaimer @01:09 – Is Asexuality part of the LGBTQ community? @01:57 – Arguments against inclusion of asexuality @03:58 – My opinion @05:07 – The Center, Vegas’ LGBTQ center @06:10 – Las Vegas PRIDE @06:53 – Asexual alienation in LGBTQ spaces @09:35 – The lack of B, T and other groups in LGBTQ spaces @11:59 – Asexual pride at PRIDE events…? @13:11 – “A” bashing in the film Gayby @14:01 – Does the rainbow flag really represent the entire LGBTQ? ================================ long video is LONG, i know. sorry! i have a lot to say on this subject. i understand that not everyone will agree with me on this topic; i certainly don’t expect eveyone to! i’m very interested in hearing others’ opinions on this, whether in regards to asexuality and the LGBTQ community or any other identity and the LGBTQ community. thanks for watching. 🙂

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Vesper H.

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