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Queer As Cat

gender・ sexuality・ race ・intersectionality

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  • Home
  • About
    • About QAC
    • About Vesper
  • Photos
    • Instagram
    • Tokyo Rainbow Pride
      • 2014
      • 2015
      • 2016
      • 2017
      • 2018
  • Resources
    • Asexual POC Resources
    • #LGBTQIA in Japan
  • Contact

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  • Q&A

    Q&A: “do you happen to know any cool aro/ace history?”

    September 26, 2016 / No Comments

    nohelpwhatsoever said: while on the subject of that “know your bi history” comic post, do you happen to know any cool aro/ace history? i actually haven’t come across any historical aces who aren’t linked to religious celibacy :/   (re: this post) i’m afraid that i’ll be of no help whatsoever (get it?) when it comes to history… of anything, really. history was always one of my least subjects in school because i can barely remember the events of my own life, let alone those of other people’s lives etc… that said, you’re in luck because some people are actually into (and good at) history– more specifically, ace history. i haven’t come across much in the way of aro history, sadly… in terms of ace history, though, definitely check out @historicallyace and their #history tag in particular to find a treasure trove of information about ace history in general. there’s…

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    Vesper H.

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    Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”

    February 23, 2016

    “the ace community goes overboard with words?” i.e. word vomitted “nah”

    April 5, 2018
  • Feedback,  Q&A

    Q&A not Q&A: “i’m nonbinary and i’m also aro/ace. i no longer WANT to be part of [the LGBT] community…”

    September 15, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: okay sorry for dragging this in here, but. i’m nonbinary. and ppl have been saying that nb ppl ARE lgbt+. but here’s the thing: i’m also aro/ace. i no longer WANT to be part of that community, even if i “qualify” bc at the end of the day, they still don’t want me there. they may be accepting of my identity as nb, but that would mean ignoring my identity as aro/ace. if i’m gonna be accepted somewhere, i want to be accepted for all of me, not just part. just my 2 cents. hello anon, i feel you on this. i really do. as a non-binary, bi / pan ace i’ve also been faced with people wanting to selectively choose what part of my “counts” or is “valid reason” for me to be included in something. like you, i am of the stance that acceptance of me is an…

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    Vesper H.

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    Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”

    February 23, 2016
  • [A]sexuality,  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A: “[my friend] told me that Ace/Aro ppl are not inherently part of the LGBT+ community unless if they identify as LGBT…”

    September 13, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: Hi Vesper. I’m still learning about all the different genders and sexualities and spectrums and I was talking to my friend the other day who’s more knowledgable than I am, and she told me that Ace/Aro ppl are not inherently part of the LGBT+ community unless if they identify as LGBT. I’m a little confused by this. Are asexuality and aromanticism not a part of LGBT+? She basically implied that bc Ace/Aro ppl are not part of LGBT+ they do not face oppression. I’m sorry if this is confusing. hello, anon. what your friend told you is nothing but her opinion and it’s an opinion that many, myself included, disagree with. you may feel like your friend is more knowledgeable than you are about gender and sexuality, but she is by no means an expert on the oppression that others do or do not face and it’s rather…

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    Vesper H.

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    QAC 01 – Introduction

    May 11, 2013

    QAC 35 – Body Image: An Intersection of Black, Non-binary & Asexual Identity

    March 16, 2015

    Studio Ghibli’s 『思い出のマーニー』 // “When Marnie Was There”

    August 11, 2014
  • [A]sexuality,  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A: “So I think that I’m aromantic?”

    August 15, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: So I think that I’m aromantic? Because like in all my 20 years of living I’ve never ever had any kind of crush or romantic feelings at all. The thing is, the idea of being in a romantic relationship sounds really nice to me. Is it possible to be aro but want to be in a romantic relationship? Like although I don’t get any kind of desire in regards to romance I still kinda want a relationship… I’m so confused it most certainly is possible to be aromantic and to want to be in a romantic relationship. while it is true that some aro people do not want to be in a romantic relationship, being aromantic is still by no means synonymous with not wanting to be in a romantic relationship. in my humble opinion, being aromantic in and of itself says nothing about the types of relationships…

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    Vesper H.

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    QAC 28 – On “Blackness”, Queer Identity & Intersectionality (a rant)

    July 14, 2014

    Documentary Explores The Reality Of Being Black And Gay In The Church

    November 14, 2015

    *scribble scribble*

    September 15, 2016
  • [A]sexuality,  Japan[ese],  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A: “I have a question regarding the Japanese use of the terms asexual and nonsexual…”

    July 27, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous post: I have a question regarding the Japanese use of the terms asexual and nonsexual. Is asexual generally used by all aces on the aromantic spectrum or do arospec aces who sometimes feel romantic attraction (such as grey aromantics) typically prefer to use nonsexual? I’d like to get more involved with the ace community when I (hopefully) move to Japan, but I feel like the Japanese terminology doesn’t even let me describe myself… (re: this post) bearing in mind that everything i’m about to say is based entirely on my own limited experience and observation… i can count the number of times i’ve met or heard of a Japanese person actively identifying in some way as gray or demi on one hand. generally speaking, awareness of nuanced ace & aro spectrum identities / orientations is hardly a thing among Japanese aces. the only time i hear any explicit mention of…

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    Vesper H.

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    Re: “”Visibility””

    September 18, 2017

    Burnt Out & Neurotic: The Toll of Blogging While Ace and Mentally Ill

    December 26, 2018

    QAC 04 – Why I Identify as Panromantic & Biromantic

    May 24, 2013
  • [A]sexuality,  Gender[queer],  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A: “That’s part of the reason why I so strongly hold onto “queer” as one of my labels!”

    June 29, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: That’s part of the reason why I so strongly hold onto “queer” as one of my labels! I identify under both the ace and aro umbrellas, but it’s weird and hard to explain and trying to say I’m bi/pan/poly/etc (even without -romantic) carries that weird connotation that doesn’t fit me. I actually think you just managed to put my feelings into words??? I’m having an epiphany and I need to go think about this more. (re: this post) i know right? i’m also very fond of ‘queer’ as a word and identity and identify strongly with it. sometimes i refer to myself as a ‘queer asexual’ rather than as a ‘bi / pan asexual’ for the sake of brevity and/or to avoid assumptions, depending on the situation and who i’m talking to. whenever i do that, ‘queer’ isn’t acting as a replacement for ‘bi’ or ‘pan’, but rather as yet another…

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    Vesper H.

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    Cosmopolitan: “Everything You Need To Know About Demisexuality”

    March 20, 2017

    more Sailor Moon Crystal fanpersoning #SCREAMING

    May 17, 2016

    QAC 36 – What Acephobia & Asexual Erasure Looks Like

    April 27, 2015
  • Q&A

    Q&A: “Would you mind explaining how you feel in regards to your bi identity?”

    June 28, 2016 / 1 Comment

    anonymous said: I have a question. I saw your post about how you find it a but annoying that people either assume you’re bisexual or bi romantic, when you always just say bi. And I’ll admit that since you are also asexual my first reaction was to assume you were biromantic, I’m sorry. But it confuses me a little. Would you mind explaining how you feel in regards to your bi identity? It’s okay if you don’t want to! I’m just trying to understand (in response to this post) first off, even though i felt a need to vent about it because it is annoying, i want to point out that i’m not offended or angry when someone misreads my bi identity, especially if they’re understanding when/if i correct them. there are so many reasons why a person would automatically read “bi” as either bisexual or biromantic that it almost…

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    Vesper H.

    You May Also Like

    Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”

    February 23, 2016

    “the ace community goes overboard with words?” i.e. word vomitted “nah”

    April 5, 2018
  • [A]sexuality,  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A: “I’ve IDed as aromantic for a while, but I’m very confused.”

    June 10, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: Question!! I’ve IDed as aromantic for a while, but I’m very confused. I think I like quioromantic, but also I feel like idemromantic could apply. Since the two are similar, how would I decide which is more accurate in describing myself? Thanks! -Cio Oh! And also, does it make sense for me to want/be in a romantic relationship even if I (don’t know if I) feel romantic attraction? If one of my close friends asked me on a date I’d quickly agree, but is that fair to them? -Cio i often suggest to people to try an identity / label ‘on for size’ to see how it ‘fits’. sometimes it’s hard to know whether something feels ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ to you just from read definitions and researching the experiences of others who identify as the identity / label that you’re interested in. sometimes things become a lot clearer more quickly by…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    romantic orientation pride

    May 29, 2013

    spotted: LGBT 101 on Japanese TV

    February 21, 2015

    Documentary Explores The Reality Of Being Black And Gay In The Church

    November 14, 2015
  • [A]sexuality,  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A: “so, i’m 21 and i’ve never been in love or had a crush or anything, and i don’t really find people attractive…”

    June 8, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: ok so, i’m 21 and i’ve never been in love or had a crush or anything, and i don’t really find people attractive, and if someone asks me if i think someone is attractive, i get really uncomfortable because i just can’t tell. i like watching porn (m/m and m/f but i don’t really like f/f porn), but i can’t imagine having sex with anyone. another thing is, i don’t really like being called a girl, cause it feels like it’s way to call me weak (i know this is not true, and i don’t want to offend anyone, it’s just how i feel when someone calls me a girl/woman) i don’t care if someone calls me a boy or makes quotation marks while calling me a girl. i think i’m aro ace but i’m not sure, what do you think? i think you should go with what…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

    You May Also Like

    AskAPan Week 08 – How I Discovered Pansexuality / Panromanticism

    July 12, 2013

    Japanese gender / queer theory, anyone?

    May 22, 2017

    landscapes and fissures: navigating ace terminology in Japanese & English

    June 1, 2018
  • [A]sexuality,  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A: “I was just trying to see if the definition of lithromantic can be bent according to who experiences it.”

    May 16, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: Hi! I was just trying to see if the definition of lithromantic can be bent according to who experiences it. Basically, the definition i experience is the one where once my feelings are reciprocated, that romantic attraction fades away. It doesnt have to necessarily mean that i get uncomfortable with having my feelings reciprocated, does it? Like, i dont necessarily mind if my partner says all these lovey dovey stuff, but most of the time i dont exactly say it back. Sorry im confused ㅠㅠ hi, anon. 🙂 being lithromantic does not mean that one automatically finds reciprocated romantic attraction repulsive upon ones own attraction fading, nor does it imply that one feels any particular way about having one’s romantic attraction reciprocated. being lithromantic means that once romantic attraction is reciprocated, the attraction that you feel fades. that’s all. what happens after that differs from person to person.…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

    You May Also Like

    gender non-conformity sure does make for good entertainment for cis people, huh Japan?

    April 25, 2016

    IF {subcommunity building} THEN {…?}

    March 11, 2019

    photos from Tokyo Rainbow Pride 2014 (04/27/2014)

    May 7, 2014
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VESPER H.

YouTuber & Blogger

Queer As Cat is the blog and YouTube channel of Vesper, an American expat currently living in Japan.
reoccurring topics include: #asexuality, #nonbinary, #queerness #blackness & #mentalhealth

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Recent Posts

  • literal “social distancing” from the ace community April 1, 2020
  • legalized weed in America: one of many chips on my Black shoulder March 7, 2020
  • willpower, sweat, and tears January 30, 2020
  • 🎬 QAC 79 – The Neverending Queer-y: My Queer Ace Journey || LGBT YouTube & COPPA January 4, 2020
  • #YouTubeIsOverParty: COPPA & The Hypocrisy of YouTube December 15, 2019

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