Feedback: “anon who asked abt alternatives to neutrois – your answer was helpful!”
anonymous said: anon who asked abt alternatives to neutrois – your answer was helpful! i haven’t seen much discussion abt neutrois as a term, so it’s good to know i’m at least not the only person who feels this way. ( re: this post ) thanks for coming back and responding. 🙂 indeed, despite the lack of talk about neutrois these days, you’re most definitely not alone. i’m sorry that months later, i still don’t have an alternative to neutrois to suggest to you, though… as i mentioned in a recent ask, i feel like even though there are people who do use ‘agender’ to mean ‘a complete lack of gender’ (ie. genderlessness), at the same time there are a lot of people who use ‘agender’ to mean something else, including ‘gender neutral’ (ie. not genderless, but rather a gender that is itself neutral). this may be nothing more than a faulty…
Q&A: “Is it just me, or has the definition [of agender] shifted?”
anonymous said: I’ve got a question about agender. I was sifting through some of your old posts and noticed that you’ve previously framed agender as including “doesn’t have any gender identity at all.” Is it just me, or has that definition shifted? I use quoigender over agender because I’ve always gotten this vibe from the nonbinary community(ies) that agender is a gender identity, like how asexuality is a sexual orientation. (Incidentally, I hope that you’re hiatus has helped you recover.) hello anon. thanks for the kind wishes and sorry for taking so long to get to your ask. i’m guessing that the old post that you are referencing might be this one? either way, i feel like everything that i said in that post still holds true today and not much has changed…? the non-binary community in general– and indeed, many agender people themselves– still has / have a tendency…
Re: Q&A not Q&A: “I’m quite surprised with the commentary about color-swapped flags being problematic…”
qpraroaceandmiscellaneous: queerascat: anonymous said: “I’m quite surprised with the commentary about color-swapped flags being problematic, since nowadays I don’t see any complaints directed at them. I’ve always heard the aro flag that just replaced purple with green was “made by someone problematic”, so I’m glad you brought that post to light (there’s also the issue of that being the most popular androsexual flag), but… I don’t think you need to worry much :p (re: this post) …honestly, what surprises (and embarrasses) me is the fact that i even forgot about how problematic those flag designs are because, reflecting back on it now, i remember color-swapped flags being part of a larger issue that eventually became at least somewhat prominently discussed on Tumblr? that larger issue being the nature of the relationship between the asexual and aromantic communities, a topic that i hardly see discussed at all these days. which is…
City of Philadelphia unveils Pride flag with brown and black stripes
blaqueer: gaywrites: Yesterday in Philadelphia, LGBTQ activists and city officials gathered to kick off Pride month by raising a new official flag. It’s the traditional rainbow flag we all know, with two additions: a black stripe and a brown stripe. The flag is part of a local initiative to address a history of racism in the city’s LGBTQ neighborhood and community groups. It’s the first time an American city has embraced the flag with brown and black stripes. G Philly covered a leaked video last year that showed a White local club owner repeatedly describing Black patrons as n-words. Backlash to the video, combined with the collective’s ongoing activism, ultimately led to a city council bill that gives the Philadelphia Commission on Human Relations the authority to penalize discriminatory businesses. Amber Hikes, a queer Black woman, now heads the Office of LGBT Affairs, and the office’s new commission includes mainly…
Q&A: “I showed a friend your post about how to say you’re nonbinary in Japanese, but he’s a demiboy…”
anonymous said: I showed a friend your post about how to say you’re nonbinary in Japanese, but he’s a demiboy and there wasn’t anything for demiboys specifically on the list. I was trying to figure out what would work (barring katakana), and I came up with 半男、やや男、and 男の一種. Which of these would be better (or is there already a Japanese term?) (re: this post) sorry for taking so long to respond to your ask! i’m afraid that i haven’t come across a Japanese equivalent (or even approximate) to “demiboy” (or to demigenders in general). the closest thing that i can think of is the commonly used: FtMよりのXジェンダー / FtM yori no x-gender /(an) FtM-ish non-binary (person) 男よりのXジェンダー / otoko yori no x-gender /(a) mannish non-binary (person) ………mmmm, yeah. *cough* as i said, these phrases are commonly used in Japanese, but your friend may not feel comfortable using them. understandably so. i would caution…
Q&A: “I heard that “nonsexual” means non-aro ace and “asexual” means aro ace in Japan.”
anonymous said: I heard that “nonsexual” means non-aro ace and “asexual” means aro ace in Japan. I’m still confused about general Japanese terms in the ace community. If you don’t mind, could you please explain the most commonly used terms? hi, anon. you heard correctly, “asexual” (Aセクシャル) doesn’t mean what it means in English in Japan.
Q&A: “[i] need help finding a word for my gender identity, if possible?”
anonymous said: need help finding a word for my gender identity, if possible? agender was close, but its not that i dont have a gender, its that my gender is neutral. neutrois appears to be the closest thing, from the definitions ive seen. while i do have dysphoria & have thought abt certain aspects of transitioning, and a desire to be neutral in appearance – all aspects of definitions of neutrois ive seen – it appears to /require/ these things. and that heavy medical/clinical emphasis makes me v uncomfortable. oh, anon… if only you knew how ironic if feels to be on the receiving end of this ask. and in fact, i’ve been on the receiving end of an ask like this before. you aren’t alone in your discomfort. the irony, though? that i feel the same way and have felt this way since 2012, back when neutrois was much…
Q&A: “What’s the best way to tell him without ruining our relationship??”
anonymous said: So I recently began flirting with a coworker as a joke, but then I thought maybe I was attracted to him. I invited him over and we talked and watched movies and then we started kissing and it was so nice and I felt so loved, but for the past week now I feel like I can’t even make eye contact with him bc I feel so awkward. I know I’m lithromantic, but I always hope that maybe I’m not whenever I’m attracted to someone. What’s the best way to tell him without ruining our relationship?? sorry for sitting on your ask for two months, anon. chances are that responding to it now won’t be of any use to you. on top of that, i’m also no good at giving relationship / communication advice, so apologies for that as well. having said all that, i’m generally a fan…
Q&A: “So I got a very flirty personality. My flirting however is I’d say 90% non sexual…”
songsandtimetravel said: Ok. So I got a very flirty personality. My flirting however is I’d say 90% non sexual, and the other 10% is with the people I feel a mutual sexual “connection” with. I know that my friendliness have been confused with sexual attraction before with non-ace people. I love my personality but as I get more involved with the queer and non binary community I get get to know more Ace-people too, and I don’t want to come off as overly sexual or make them uncomfortable.Got any thoughts on what I can do? sorry for taking so long getting back to you. not sure if you even still want to hear my thoughts, but… i think that the situation that you’ve found yourself in is reflective of an overarching problem within society as a whole rather than being reflective of a problem with flirting or your personality.…
on the discrepancy between “asexual” in English & Japanese and confusion regarding demisexuality.
if you’re unfamiliar with ace terminology in Japanese, it may come as some surprise to you to know that Aセクシャル / アセクシャル, the Japanese word that is phonetically equivalent to and derived from the English word “asexual”, does not mean what “asexual” means in English. while it is used at times as an umbrella term to refer to all aces, it’s often used both by aces and non-aces alike to refer specifically to what English speakers now commonly refer to as “aromantic asexuals”– or rather, people who experience neither sexual nor romantic attraction. Japanese speakers use a different word entirely to refer to people who do not experience sexual attraction but who do experience romantic attraction: ノンセクシャル, a word that is phonetically equivalent to and derived from the English word “nonsexual”… despite the fact that word means something entirely different in English. as this linguistic and cultural discrepancy is something that affects me personally not…
