“too butch.”
as the clock counts down to me sitting in a hairstylist's chair to get my hair chopped off—a clock that started its countdown years ago in my head, but has only recently been given a definitive calendar date of May 18th, 2019—i've on-and-off made an effort to help my mom 'get over it.'
IF {subcommunity building} THEN {…?}
...wouldn't it be great if there was more of a sense of intersectional community, comradery, and identity among aces who are also bi? among aces who are also gay? among aces who are also sans romantic orientation? among aces who are simultaneously a part of any other minority community (sexuality-based or not) in addition to also being ace...?
Ie Uru Onna Gyakushuu S2E3: “A home that is accepting of all [kinds of] love?!”
the video above is the commercial for season 2 episode 3 of the popular Japanese TV drama 家売るオンナ逆襲 /“Ie Uru Onna Gyakushuu” (”Your Home Is My Business! Counterstrike”), which just aired tonight...
the ‘Sin City’ asexual
sometimes i think about how growing up in Las Vegas has affected me. usually this is triggered by something reminding me that growing up listening to house & trance music on the radio isn't exactly common, or when i happen to have an occasion-- for whatever reason-- to question my own apparent insensitivity to public displays of nudity, sexual innuendo, etc. even when it comes to more mundane things...
This Is Fine.
in 2015, i wrote a random, word vomit of a post about being “WhenTheStarsAlignHyperRo[mantic]” while offhandedly reflecting back on what little ‘data’ i had to work off of in trying to figure out my own experience of romantic attraction (or lack thereof). it was the first second (in so far as i remember) time i had questioned not being (allo)romantic outside of my head (& journal) while shrugging off identifying as being on the aromantic spectrum.
chronic long-term memory problems…
…is almost like living life like a computer with only a rudimentary, low capacity Hard Disk Drive dedicated to storing what you (might) need in the Here And Now or Imminent Future (short-term memories) and nothing but Random Access Memory for all the rest (long-term memories).
5 years and counting…
it just occurred to me (while porting over more old posts) that Queer As Cat, the YouTube channel, has been a thing for 5 years now as of May 11th. hmm……
Q&A: “Is it just me, or has the definition [of agender] shifted?”
anonymous said: I’ve got a question about agender. I was sifting through some of your old posts and noticed that you’ve previously framed agender as including “doesn’t have any gender identity at all.” Is it just me, or has that definition shifted? I use quoigender over agender because I’ve always gotten this vibe from the nonbinary community(ies) that agender is a gender identity, like how asexuality is a sexual orientation. (Incidentally, I hope that you’re hiatus has helped you recover.) hello anon. thanks for the kind wishes and sorry for taking so long to get to your ask. i’m guessing that the old post that you are referencing might be this one? either way, i feel like everything that i said in that post still holds true today and not much has changed…? the non-binary community in general– and indeed, many agender people themselves– still has / have a tendency…
….mmm, you know.
i’d make a quasi-linkspam of a post about the many times and ways that i’ve had aro aces tell me that i can’t do / say / talk about / feel / understand something because i’m “romantic”, but more than likely i’d get accused of being arophobic instead of, you know, pointing out a legitimate problem within the aro ace community that ought to be addressed.
identity politics leave little room for agency; a thought.
i don’t know why, but it only just occurred to me that in referring to myself as a “queer ace”, as i sometimes do, i may be inadvertently giving off the impression that i don’t think that aces are inherently queer…? that “queer” modifies my aceness rather than encompasses it…??
