let’s talk: the trans/cis binary
note: this post is also a YouTube video, which was made in response to commentary made on another video about identifying as non-binary but not trans. you may want to watch the latter video before reading this. let’s talk about gender. let’s talk how you may or may not be aware of the false binary or dichotomy of male / female gender and how it erases non-binary people. then, let’s talk about how that isn’t the only binary that exists involving gender and identity. let’s talk about how even if a non-binary person manages to navigate the male / female gender binary within society and exist openly as a non-binary person, they’re then faced with yet another binary, another dichotomy from within the very communities that they should at least be able to feel safer in. let’s talk about how within the LGBTQIA there is / are: questionnaires, registration forms,…
QAC 53 – The Trans/Cis Binary | Non-Binary vs Trans Identity | Let’s Talk
as awareness of non-binary people continues to grow and awareness of the fallacy that is male/female gender binary grows with it, is a new gender binary taking its place? there is a common assumption within society in general, but dually so within the LGBT community, that anyone who isn’t trans is cis and vice versa… if you’re someone who believes this to be true, i’d like to invite you to join in on a conversation. let’s talk! even if you don’t believe that to be true, have a seat. let’s talk! but before we do, do me a favor and watch this video. ———– RELATED LINKS ———– QAC 52 – Non-Binary vs Trans Identity | “Transitioning” “Let’s Talk: The Trans/Cis Binary” (Tumblr post)
QAC 52 – Non-Binary vs Trans Identity | “Transitioning” | #NonBinaryYT
as someone who is non-binary but who does not identify as trans, i have a rather complicated relationship with the term and concept of “transitioning” and with trans-specific community, resources, etc in general. this video, a submission to the #NonBinaryYT collaboration project, is about my personal relationship with trans identity, my coming out process, what has and hasn’t changed for me during the 4 years that i’ve identified as non-binary, thoughts on “transitioning” as non-binary and conflicted feelings about rejecting trans identity. ————– TIME POINTS ———— @ 00:00 – Intro: What is #NonBinaryYT? ——– (ie. you should totally participate if you’re non-binary and interested) @ 01:00 – Q1. Do you identify as trans? What does that mean to you? ——– (ie. not identifying as trans and why that is uuggghh) @ 02:58 – Q2. What did coming out for the first time look like for you? ——– (ie. discovering the word…
Q&A: “Are there any good reasons why the split attraction model should be something only a-spec people use?”
anonymous said: Are there any good reasons why the split attraction model should be something only a-spec people use? A-spec aren’t the only people with crossed orientations. as far as i’m concerned, there is no reason why someone couldn’t or shouldn’t make use of the split attraction model if they feel it meaningful to do so. anyone who insists on telling someone that something that they find meaningful or helpful for themself is “actually more harmful than helpful” needs to stop and think about why it is that they feel it alright to attempt to undermine someone else’s agency over their own identity like that. the reason that i always see being upheld as for why the split attraction model is “more harmful than helpful” for people who aren’t asexual and / or aromantic always boils down to “because it was harmful for me.” in fact, after commenting on the post that…
Feedback: “Thanks for the heteroromantic homosexual flag and thank you for your responses…”
anonymous said: Thanks for the heteroromantic homosexual flag and thank you for your responses and other people for their nice comments when this other tumblr user was more or less telling I’m not normal. It took more than 30 years before I could name my orientation and I was so happy when I was finally could do it. So it’s not nice to be insulted by someone who wasn’t asked a thing. Sorry if you were annoyed because of me and sorry for my bad English, it’s not my mother tongue. And again THANKS. (re: this post) no problem, anon, and no worries. i’m more than happy to help when i can and your English is great. i was annoyed at the other person, not you. 🙂
Q&A not Q&A: “Have you seen that post going around saying the being asexual is a modifier not an orientation?”
anonymous said: Have you seen that post going around saying the being asexual is a modifier not an orientation? It also seemed to imply that asexuality is a choice? I’m really tired of misinformation about asexuals being spread around. …mmm, no i have not seen the post in question, but a quick search has brought up this post (warning: offensive ignorance is offensive) that i’m guessing might be the one you’re referring to…? was posted about 20hrs ago (i received this ask 4hrs ago) and yet has somehow already amassed 200 notes without a single critic of its content in sight. the spreading of misinformation (maliciously or not) is annoying indeed. that said, i just so happen to be Apathetic As Hell about what others think and am very confident and comfortable in my identity as an asexual, so it’s pretty easy for me to not give a damn about…
Q&A not Q&A: “I think opression is a determining factors for the LGBT+ community…”
anonymous said: I think opression is a determining factors for the LGBT+ community, isnt the opression we shared what ended up bringing us together (re: this post) …this response started out short, but then it turned into me venting. sorry, anon. sure, for some it is a major– possibly even a determining– factor of their personal identity as a member of the LGBTQIA+ community. but like i said, imho, it isn’t the determining factor. even if one person does feel like it is the determining factor of their personal identity, it is a mistake to then assume that that holds true for everyone. not everyone’s identity is determined in part or entirely by their oppression. on top of that, oppression isn’t even something one can measure to determine whether someone is “oppressed enough” to have the right to identify as a part of the community. if someone was to try and measure…
Q&A: “where do you personally consider the line between white and poc to be?”
anonymous said: where do you personally consider the line between white and poc to be? I’ve heard some arguments about Mediterranean people not being white (tho ive always thought they were??) and arguments that ethnically Jewish people are white (??) and as a white person (sorry) i dont think i have a say in what is poc or not. regardless, what are your thoughts? “where do you personally consider the line between white and poc to be?” the answer to this question is easy: i personally consider the line to be no where because i don’t draw one to begin with. some may think me naive for this, but i personally do not give any thought as to whether X ethnic group of people are white or people of color. why would i? what purpose would that serve? “person of color” is an identity. if someone is a person of…
Q&A: “One of my cis male friends said he identifies as a lesbian.”
anonymous said: One of my cis male friends said he identifies as a lesbian. When I tried telling him that wasn’t okay, he said that I have to respect his identity and that anyone who identifies as a lesbian is a lesbian. He used nonbinary people as an example. He called me a gatekeeper. What can I do/say? Is he right? Can anyone id as a lesbian? Is it always bad to be a gatekeeper? …i find myself wanting to think that this friend of yours was just kidding, was just trying to pull your leg, was perhaps trying to put into words something about himself but upon failing at finding better words settling on those words– but perhaps i really am just grasping at straws and your friend really is just a cis binary male who identifies as a lesbian. i actually googled “male lesbian” just now and got a…
Q&A: “why is passing considered a privilege with some identities but not others…”
anonymous said: I feel like for the disabled community and the POC community being able to pass is considered a privilege. I had read a previous anon q you answered and I felt like some of the things you mentioned in it could apply to these communities as well. Ex. Having a part of your identity being erased being oppressive and not a privilege. I guess I’m wanting to hear your opinion about why passing is considered a privilege with some identities but not others. Thanks! [the post that anon is referring to] hi, anon! i think it’s safe to assume that it’s “able-bodied passing privilege” and “white passing privilege” that you had in mind in your ask. in my humble opinion, many of the things that i said in my other post equally apply to both of these concepts of “passing privilege” as well. i may be the only person in the…
