fandom Archives | Queer As Cat

[A]sexuality, Mental [Un]health, Queer[ness]

Burnt Out & Neurotic: The Toll of Blogging While Ace and Mentally Ill

December 26, 2018 / 3 Comments

Over the course of the past few years or so, I've had no choice but to come face-to-face with the fact that I'm not exactly the spitting image of mental health. That, in fact, I never have been, having struggled with persistent depression and social anxiety for years, whether I was conscious of that fact or not. As such, debilitating depression/anxiety isn't new to me. Simultaneous burnout and mental breakdown on account of blogging was, however.

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Vesper H.

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Q&A

Q&A: “I’m a sex repulsed Aromantic asexual non binary and fandom shipping really bothers me…”

August 31, 2017 / No Comments

anonymous said: I’m a sex repulsed Aromantic asexual non binary and fandom shipping really bothers me , like really hurts me , I’ve spent seven years warring with shippers to prove my favorite character deserved better than a straight ship , his co star has a shady background and I don’t trust her either , anyway I’m done fighting , I know I’ve lost the war , the ship is cannon and I’m sunk , and I’m at a loss what to do , I want to die , I feel like a samurai that lost the war you know ? How do I get over it ? hi, anon. first of all, sorry for taking so long to get to your ask. i hope you feel at least somewhat better now compared to when you sent this 10 days ago. going to be completely honest with you, anon……. i…

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Vesper H.

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“the ace community goes overboard with words?” i.e. word vomitted “nah”
April 5, 2018

Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”
February 23, 2016
[A]sexuality, Mental [Un]health, Queer[ness]

the #Jughead mess masterpost

January 20, 2017 / 4 Comments

this post marks the last time i’ll be responding to asks about / reblogs of the post i made about the fight for Jughead’s correct portrayal on the CW’s Riverdale. after 3 days of responding to nearly 15 asks / posts on the topic and the anxiety that that has caused me on top of everything else going on in my life, i’m calling it quits on that post. while i still stand by the admittedly unclear point that i was attempting to make, i do apologize to those who were hurt by my unclear wording. i’m also done with talking about asexual representation in general or fandom-related anything anymore. while i appreciate the kind words of encouragement i received, it’s not worth the cost to my mental health to talk about even my own representation anymore. this post serves as both a future point of reference on the mess that…

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Vesper H.

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September 9, 2013

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March 11, 2019
[Random] Thoughts, Japan[ese], Queer[ness]

Re: Yuri!!! On Ice & that annoying thing that anime & fandom does

December 14, 2016 / No Comments

…so, i’ve just started watching Yuri!!! On Ice (i’m only 3 episodes in), but already there’s something that’s kind of annoying me about it. you know, how Victor keeps putting poor Yuri into really awkward, sometimes overtly sexual, situations that in real life would typically be viewed as sexual harassment or otherwise in appropriate but that is obviously considered to be more than okay by the people making the anime (and anime / manga in general) and is considered to be “cute”, “hot”, “relationship goals” by fans.

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Vesper H.

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Q&A: “what’s the deal with the fact that lesbian folks get mad if you headcanon characters as ace?”

May 25, 2016 / No Comments

titanium-star-bisexual said: hey vesper? sorry to bother you with this again, especially when we kinda already spoke on it, but now people have started getting offended and attacking me for my head canons in my inbox. i wanted to ask if you knew what the deal is with the fact that lesbian folks get mad if you headcanon characters as ace? i thought a person could be both at the same time? ? im just not sure what to do because they are really getting angry. any pointers? hi. 🙂 you’re never a bother, so no worries. but aahhh, i feel like i’m the wrong person to be giving any kind of pointers on how to deal with fandom backlash. i do not involve myself in any kind of fandom, largely in part because i do not want to deal with this kinda stuff. as such, i have zero…

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Vesper H.

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“the ace community goes overboard with words?” i.e. word vomitted “nah”
April 5, 2018

Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”
February 23, 2016
[A]sexuality, Q&A, Queer[ness]

Q&A: “All the backlash over the #GiveSteveABoyfriend thing is making me feel like crap.”

May 25, 2016 / No Comments

tw: suicide, death, self harm anonymous said: All the backlash over the #GiveSteveABoyfriend thing is making me feel like crap. I’m Christian and queer, and I’m starting to freak out. Maybe it’s right for queer people to kill themselves? Maybe I shouldn’t exist? anon, please take this moment to close Twitter, stop everything you’re doing and just breathe. relax. listen. regardless of whatever anyone else says, who you are as a Christian and as a queer person is valid. as hard as life may be sometimes, please do not throw yours away. your life, and the life of every queer person, is far more valuable and worth living than you seem to think right now. please block and ignore anything that brings you down like this, including the hashtags #GiveSteveABoyfriend and #GiveCaptianAmericaABoyfriend on Twitter. do not subject yourself to people’s bullshit. there are lots of other people in those tags…

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Vesper H.

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October 27, 2013
[A]sexuality, [Random] Thoughts, Queer[ness]

#LeaveElsaAlone

May 11, 2016 / 1 Comment

quoted from a Tumblr post: Okay so I’m not against #GiveElsaAGirlfriend or anything, but I identify myself as an asexual person and honestly I would be really happy if there could be a princess who doesn’t need a prince or a princess or anyone. It would be really cool if there can be just one Disney character that does not need that kind of love, because being asexual is not easy to explain and much less to understand for others and yeah I think that #LeaveElsaAlone is much more accurate. please note: the following isn’t directed specifically at the OP so much as it’s directed at anyone & everyone who thinks that #LeaveElsaAlone is a good idea. could aces please, please, please not do that really shitty thing where you piggyback off of another community’s hashtag advocacy?? actually, this isn’t even piggybacking, really. i consider #AllLivesMatters to be piggybacking off…

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Vesper H.

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July 23, 2017

QAC 51 – #ProudToBe Black Non-Binary Bi Pan AND Asexual
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Q&A

Q&A not Q&A: “what if ruby and sapphire (and garnet) from su are all bisexual and maverique?”

May 5, 2016 / No Comments

anonymous said: hear me out: what if ruby and sapphire (and garnet) from su are all bisexual and maverique? ✨ (i wanna know what you think bc people are acting shady towards me for this and it upsets me) sounds like a really awesome headcanon to me! 🙂 however, i’m not surprised that people are acting shady towards you, sadly… from what i’ve seen / heard, SU fans can be incredibly hostile when it comes to headcanons re: the gems’ gender(s) and sexuality(/ies). i myself am not really into fandom (the hostility prevents me from enjoying it at all), but i personally prefer to think of the gems as existing without genders or sexual orientations because: unlike human society, gem society does not have the social construct of gender to begin with? imho, gender is assigned to them by humans (because humans insist on gendering everyone & everything) and…

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Vesper H.

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Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”
February 23, 2016

“the ace community goes overboard with words?” i.e. word vomitted “nah”
April 5, 2018