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Queer As Cat

gender・ sexuality・ race ・intersectionality

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    • About QAC
    • About Vesper
  • Photos
    • Instagram
    • Tokyo Rainbow Pride
      • 2014
      • 2015
      • 2016
      • 2017
      • 2018
  • Resources
    • Asexual POC Resources
    • #LGBTQIA in Japan
  • Contact

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  • [A]sexuality,  Japan[ese],  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A: “I was wondering if you know of any articles or websites about what it’s like being ace in Japan…”

    August 20, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: Hi there….I was wondering if you know of any articles or websites about what it’s like being ace in Japan (especially from the perspective of any ace people who are natively Japanese). I’m just interested in reading people’s experiences, where they learned about asexuality, etc. I tried searching google, but so much acephobic garbage came up that I had to finally shut down my browser. D: aside from the things that @harris-hijiri​ writes, which aren’t necessarily about the experience of being ace in Japan, i’m afraid that i don’t know of personal writing on being ace in Japan as a Japanese person that’s written in English. i tried searching for some, but i swear if i come across another article on herbivore men or ‘the japanese sex/population crisis’ written from a Western-centric point of view i’m going to throw my laptop out the goddamn window. everything that i could…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    QAC 03 – Romantic Orientations & Other Types of Attraction

    May 24, 2013

    ?Tokyo Rainbow Pride 2017: Parade & Ace Meetup

    April 29, 2017

    on the discrepancy between “asexual” in English & Japanese and confusion regarding demisexuality.

    May 12, 2017
  • [A]sexuality,  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A: “My husband has known I’m more ace than anything else… he just told me he hasnt been telling…”

    August 8, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: Hey, I rly just need an outward view. My husband has known I’m more ace than anything else(pretty sure I’m full ace, pan-rom but still figuring that out)&he just told me he hasnt been telling me when he’s had sexual feelings for me because it’s “not a thing you want and I don’t want to feel like an asshole for having sexual feelings.”I explained the difference between attraction&arousal&now he is really not ok with me not having sexual attraction towards him(cause he just realised it maybe?) I have no idea what to do because he can get rly insecure and he has no idea about the pan thing. I’ve mentioned poly things too, not saying I want it but if he did I’d be okay to try it, but he said he’s done if I ever want anything like it. I guess I just feel weird about things…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    QAC 19 – Asexuality: An FAQ

    October 25, 2013

    romantic orientation pride

    May 29, 2013

    QAC 36 – What Acephobia & Asexual Erasure Looks Like

    April 27, 2015
  • 『[4コマ]☆AセクシュアルとAce(エース)☆』
    [A]sexuality,  [Random] Thoughts,  Japan[ese],  Queer[ness]

    『[4コマ]☆AセクシュアルとAce(エース)☆』

    July 27, 2016 / 1 Comment

    once again i randomly came across another one of Chii’s 4-koma comic strips about asexuality on Twitter and my reaction to seeing it has me feeling guilty and torn. ;( for those who don’t speak Japanese, the comic introduces the term “ace” (slang for “asexual”) to Japanese readers and then explains how it’s connected to aces in playing cards. it also introduces readers to the concept / association that’s been floating around English-speaking ace communities of each suite being associated with specific orientations / identities. in the comic, it’s explained as: ace of hearts: romantic asexuals (known as “nonsexuals” in Japan) ace of spades: aromantic asexuals (known as “asexuals” in Japan) ace of diamonds: demisexuals and demiromantic asexuals ace of clubs: gray asexuals and grayromantic asexuals before i start ranting going on and on about ‘nothing’, i want to point out that i’m happy that “ace” is being introduced here in Japanese. no conflicting feelings there.…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    photos from Tokyo Rainbow Pride 2014 (04/27/2014)

    May 7, 2014

    QAC 37 – Forced Out of the Closet: 1.5 Years Later (Non-Binary Asexual)

    June 16, 2015

    QAC 48 – Non-Binary Gender Norms & (A)sexuality: Yeah, No.

    March 27, 2016
  • [A]sexuality,  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A: “What are your thoughts on the ‘ace discourse’?”

    July 23, 2016 / 1 Comment

    anonymous said: Hi! I really like your blog, and I’ve seen a few of your videos, you’re really cool and you helped me a lot on understanding my identity. I wanted to ask you, but of course you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to, what are your thoughts on the ‘ace discourse’? hello and thanks for the kind words. 🙂 i’m going to be a bit pedantic and ask what exactly you’re referring to when you say ‘the ace discourse’ because i feel like this phrase is being used to refer to a lot of different (although related) stuff that’s been going on on Tumblr for a while now. do you mean how some people insist that inclusion in ‘the LGBT community’ is based on oppression? that aces aren’t oppressed at all? that aces are oppressed, but not for being ace? do you mean how some people insist that…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    VICELAND – GAYCATION Episode 1: Japan

    March 3, 2016

    the ‘Sin City’ asexual

    January 10, 2019

    Re: “”Visibility””

    September 18, 2017
  • Q&A

    Q&A: “I’m asexual, and for months have been trying to figure out if I am biromantic or panromantic…”

    July 13, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: Hello! I’m asexual, and for months have been trying to figure out if I am biromantic or panromantic, yet I can’t seem to make sense of it. I also noticed you used all three terms, minus the ‘-romantic’ suffix. Would you be willing to talk about how those three connect for you, even just briefly? Thank you, and I hope you have a wonderful day/night. hi. 🙂 how being bi, pan and ace connect for me, eh…? mmm… well, the short and simplified way that i usually go about explaining my sexuality to people is that i am (have the potential to be) attracted to people of any gender, but that attraction is never sexual. …and unless the person in question responds to that with further questions or i feel like going into more detail than that, i usually just leave it at that because i think that’s as…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”

    February 23, 2016

    “the ace community goes overboard with words?” i.e. word vomitted “nah”

    April 5, 2018
  • [A]sexuality,  Mental [Un]health,  Queer[ness]

    reflecting back on years of consent without information about asexuality

    July 11, 2016 / 1 Comment

    content warning: mentions of sex and abuse; talk of consent issues. this is the second of what has now become three posts that i’m writing about my personal experiences with sexual abuse / violence and consent issues, the first of which can be found here. this post focuses on how my ability to consent may or may not have been affected by not knowing about the existence of asexuality prior to consenting to sex in past relationships. even though there are those who insist that consent is as simple as “yes” or “no,” that there is no gray area involved– you either consented or you didn’t– for lots of people consent can be more complicated than that. in my time on Tumblr, various posts have come across my dashboard on the topic of consent and/or agency, specifically in the context of being asexual. sometimes when i read one of those posts, some…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    *scribble scribble*

    September 15, 2016

    QAC 48 – Non-Binary Gender Norms & (A)sexuality: Yeah, No.

    March 27, 2016

    AskAPan Week 07 – Family responses to the LGBTQ community

    July 5, 2013
  • [A]sexuality,  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A: “…the way mainstream media sexualizes wlw relationships so dramatically is making it really hard for me to figure out…”

    July 3, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: Hi. I’m pretty sure I’m bi, but I’m on the ace spectrum and the way mainstream media sexualizes wlw relationships so dramatically is making it really hard for me to figure everything out. Does anyone else struggle with this? How do I get past it? i can’t speak for anyone else but myself, but at the same time i am fairly certain that many people (ace spectrum or not, woman themself or not) struggle with the hypersexualization of women in general in the media and trying to figure out one’s own feelings in spite of that hypersexualization. however, you’re not just anyone. trying to figure out your feelings in the midst of all this hypersexualization as a woman loving woman (wlw) yourself (or so i assume; apologies if i’m wrong) makes the stuff in the media feel all the more potent and difficult to navigate, i think. wlw…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    QAC 51 – #ProudToBe Black Non-Binary Bi Pan AND Asexual

    June 22, 2016

    Tokyo Rainbow Pride 2015 (4/26/15)

    May 10, 2015

    fuck your Oppression Olympics

    September 15, 2016
  • [A]sexuality,  Gender[queer],  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A: “That’s part of the reason why I so strongly hold onto “queer” as one of my labels!”

    June 29, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: That’s part of the reason why I so strongly hold onto “queer” as one of my labels! I identify under both the ace and aro umbrellas, but it’s weird and hard to explain and trying to say I’m bi/pan/poly/etc (even without -romantic) carries that weird connotation that doesn’t fit me. I actually think you just managed to put my feelings into words??? I’m having an epiphany and I need to go think about this more. (re: this post) i know right? i’m also very fond of ‘queer’ as a word and identity and identify strongly with it. sometimes i refer to myself as a ‘queer asexual’ rather than as a ‘bi / pan asexual’ for the sake of brevity and/or to avoid assumptions, depending on the situation and who i’m talking to. whenever i do that, ‘queer’ isn’t acting as a replacement for ‘bi’ or ‘pan’, but rather as yet another…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    spotted: same-gender marriage feature on Japanese news

    October 12, 2015

    AskAPan Week 08 – How I Discovered Pansexuality / Panromanticism

    July 12, 2013

    spotted: LGBT 101 on Japanese TV

    February 21, 2015
  • [A]sexuality,  Gender[queer],  Queer[ness],  YouTube[r]

    QAC 51 – #ProudToBe Black Non-Binary Bi Pan AND Asexual

    June 22, 2016 / 1 Comment

    for those who don’t know, YouTube is currently spotlighting videos by LGBTQIA creators expressing their Pride in who they are using the #ProudToBe hashtag. i thought i’d jump on the bandwagon and add some encouraging words and visibility / representation for people like me. as the video description says, YouTube joined forces with many popular LGBTQIA content creators on its site to release the #ProudToBe spotlight today. inspired by others’ videos, but also pissed off by the public’s response to the hashtag / spotlight, i decided to make this impromptu video upon getting home from work. it’s not great, but might as well throw my face out there too, eh? as i mentioned, the public’s response to the hashtag / spotlight has been especially severe… trolls have been out in force like never before, spamming everything from the comments section of YouTube’s spotlight video itself to the comment sections of literally…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    Studio Ghibli’s 『思い出のマーニー』 // “When Marnie Was There”

    August 11, 2014

    …annnd that’s a wrap!

    May 7, 2017

     “Things Asexual People Want You To Know” – BuzzFeed LGBT

    October 29, 2017
  • [A]sexuality,  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A not Q&A: “Have you seen that post going around saying the being asexual is a modifier not an orientation?”

    June 18, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: Have you seen that post going around saying the being asexual is a modifier not an orientation? It also seemed to imply that asexuality is a choice? I’m really tired of misinformation about asexuals being spread around. …mmm, no i have not seen the post in question, but a quick search has brought up this post (warning: offensive ignorance is offensive) that i’m guessing might be the one you’re referring to…? was posted about 20hrs ago (i received this ask 4hrs ago) and yet has somehow already amassed 200 notes without a single critic of its content in sight. the spreading of misinformation (maliciously or not) is annoying indeed. that said, i just so happen to be Apathetic As Hell about what others think and am very confident and comfortable in my identity as an asexual, so it’s pretty easy for me to not give a damn about…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

    You May Also Like

    QAC 11 – Growing Up Ace (Asexual)

    July 21, 2013

    Re: Tokyo Ace Meetup

    April 5, 2015

    QAC 75 – Questioning In Silence?: Identity | Self-Discovery | Stigma || Random Thoughts

    February 27, 2019
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VESPER H.

YouTuber & Blogger

Queer As Cat is the blog and YouTube channel of Vesper, an American expat currently living in Japan.
reoccurring topics include: #asexuality, #nonbinary, #queerness #blackness & #mentalhealth

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Recent Posts

  • literal “social distancing” from the ace community April 1, 2020
  • legalized weed in America: one of many chips on my Black shoulder March 7, 2020
  • willpower, sweat, and tears January 30, 2020
  • 🎬 QAC 79 – The Neverending Queer-y: My Queer Ace Journey || LGBT YouTube & COPPA January 4, 2020
  • #YouTubeIsOverParty: COPPA & The Hypocrisy of YouTube December 15, 2019

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