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Queer As Cat

gender・ sexuality・ race ・intersectionality

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  • Home
  • About
    • About QAC
    • About Vesper
  • Photos
    • Instagram
    • Tokyo Rainbow Pride
      • 2014
      • 2015
      • 2016
      • 2017
      • 2018
  • Resources
    • Asexual POC Resources
    • #LGBTQIA in Japan
  • Contact

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Japanese gender / queer theory, anyone?

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May 22, 2017

Tokyo Rainbow Pride 2018

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June 10, 2018

identity politics leave little room for agency; a thought.

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July 21, 2017

Burnt Out & Neurotic: The Toll of Blogging While Ace and Mentally Ill

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December 26, 2018

QAC 72 – Outted To Religious Mom: 4 Years Later | HRT | Non-Binary Relationship || #ItGetsBetter?

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September 18, 2018
  • Q&A

    Q&A: “One of my cis male friends said he identifies as a lesbian.”

    December 14, 2015 / No Comments

    anonymous said: One of my cis male friends said he identifies as a lesbian. When I tried telling him that wasn’t okay, he said that I have to respect his identity and that anyone who identifies as a lesbian is a lesbian. He used nonbinary people as an example. He called me a gatekeeper. What can I do/say? Is he right? Can anyone id as a lesbian? Is it always bad to be a gatekeeper? …i find myself wanting to think that this friend of yours was just kidding, was just trying to pull your leg, was perhaps trying to put into words something about himself but upon failing at finding better words settling on those words– but perhaps i really am just grasping at straws and your friend really is just a cis binary male who identifies as a lesbian. i actually googled “male lesbian” just now and got a…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    April 5, 2018

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  • Q&A

    Q&A not Q&A: ” Aporagender is an appropriative term used/coined by white people…”

    December 14, 2015 / No Comments

    anonymous said: On the aporagender topic. Aporagender is an appropriative term used/coined by white people who were sad they couldn’t use the term third gender. I’d advise you to use maverique, which is basically the same, but coined by a PoC and thus not appropriative. dear anon, care to explain what, exactly, is being appropriated by aporagender? the word itself isn’t appropriative, so what is it that’s being appropriated? do you seriously think that people of color are the only people who have the right to coin words for their own gender if it happens to be completely outside of the male-female binary?? also, you do realize that “third gender” is a word coined and used by white colonialist and anthropologists to indiscriminately and non-consensually label the genders of non-white people that they deemed “deviant” from “the norm”? that “third gender” itself is a white colonialist term, not a ‘POC term’?? yes, it’s a…

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    Vesper H.

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    February 23, 2016

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  • Q&A

    Q&A: “Bisexism is the discriminating views of bisexuals against monosexuals…”

    December 8, 2015 / No Comments

    anonymous said: “Bisexism is the discriminating views of bisexuals against monosexuals. Bisexists believe that limiting oneself to only one gender or sex is forced and discriminative, and due to social conditioning rather than free thought. ” Thoughts? this is the first time i’ve ever heard of the term “bisexism”. my initial thoughts are: why is this even being called “bisexism”? is it because the coiner of this word thinks that only bi people could hold such views? is it because the coiner thinks that bi people are the only people attracted to more than one gender? is it just because the coiner happened to encounter people who were bi who held such views? seriously, why are bi people the ones being called out for this? as if others aren’t capable of holding the ignorant views that are being referred to as “bisexism”. if someone wants to argue for the word “multisexism” in response to…

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    Vesper H.

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    April 5, 2018

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    February 23, 2016
  • Mental [Un]health,  YouTube[r]

    QAC 43 – Coming to Terms w/ Depression & Anxiety | Mental Health

    December 7, 2015 / 1 Comment

    my journey to self-awareness and self-acceptance regarding the state of my own mental health has been a long one. 15-some-odd years i’ve been struggling with persistent depression and social anxiety and my journey is far from over. in this video i talk about how i went for over a decade without even knowing what “mental health” even was and how i’ve struggled going from that to where i am today, having finally accepted my mental health for what it is. i also briefly mention how the intersectionality of race, sexuality and gender factored into my struggle with mental wellbeing. for those who’d prefer to read most of what was said here, check out this Tumblr post: http://tmblr.co/Z04EMt1y9JmEq the video ended up being fairly long, but oh well. i’m glad i wrote most of it out and posted it to Tumblr first then sat on it for weeks. made talking about…

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    Vesper H.

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    QAC 59 – Antidepressants 3 Months Later | BetterHelp: Online Therapy| World Mental Health Day

    October 10, 2017

    comments on my “QAC 36 – What Acephobia & Asexual Erasure Looks Like” video.

    November 26, 2015

    chronic long-term memory problems…

    July 4, 2018
  • Q&A

    Q&A: “Can polysexual gay people be biphobic? Also can bi people be homophobic?”

    December 7, 2015 / No Comments

    anonymous said: Can polysexual gay people be biphobic? Also can bi people be homophobic? both biphobia and homophobia are a set of beliefs and actions based upon those beliefs. literally anyone of any sexuality (or gender) can hold such beliefs, so literally anyone could potentially be biphobic or homophobic, imho.

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  • Q&A

    Q&A: “Can nonbinary lesbians be monosexist?”

    December 7, 2015 / No Comments

    anonymous said: Can nonbinary lesbians be monosexist? I’m bisexual and I used the term monosexual during a conversation with someone I’ve been seeing and they were not happy about it. They identify as genderqueer and a lesbian and said that the term monosexual limits who can identify as a lesbian and ignores nonbinary folk. I don’t feel like they were being monosexist but were they? I feel the term is useful but they had very valid points. monosexism, in short, is the belief that monosexualities (ie. heterosexuality and homosexuality) are the only “true” or “legit” sexualities. e.g. the belief that non-monosexuals (bisexuals, pansexuals, polysexuals etc) are “really just either straight or gay.” literally anyone of any sexuality or gender could hold such beliefs, so literally anyone could potentially be monosexist. however, your friend taking issue with the term monosexual (as some people do for various reasons) and saying that it limits who can…

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  • [Random] Thoughts,  Black[ness],  Japan[ese]

    western bullshit travels & comes out of the mouth of babes. ugh.

    November 30, 2015 / No Comments

    …in one of my classes today we were discussing colors and food. we were in the middle of discussing food that’s yellow and someone’d said banana, so i wrote it on the board under yellow. all of the kids were talking at once shouting colors and foods, but then one kid talks louder to try to get my attention. kid: ne ne! i heard foreigners call Japanese people “yellow”! me: *quickly turns to kid wide-eyed* …what?? kid: yeah, like you know how there’s black people, they call Japanese people “yellow monkeys”. me: *staring at this kid totally wide-eyed and slack-jawed in utter disbelief* *in the seconds of silence while my mind’s thinking a million different things, a few other kids stop talking and stare at me having noted my odd reaction* me: *5 secs that feel like a minute later* that’s hella offensive, where did you hear– never mind, what’s…

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    Vesper H.

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    Sixty-six // Thirty-three

    December 22, 2018

    fuck your Oppression Olympics

    September 15, 2016

    a 1.5 hour conversation with a random Nigirian

    October 12, 2017
  • Q&A

    Q&A: “So I have a friend who uses they/them/theirs and identifies as a lesbian.”

    November 28, 2015 / No Comments

    anonymous said: So I have a friend who uses they/them/theirs and identifies as a lesbian. A mutual friend of ours recently made a comment about how our friend is identifying “wrong” because only women can be lesbians. I’m not sure how to respond to this other than calling them an asshole, which I already did. Also I don’t know if I should tell my friend about this because like I said earlier they are also friends with said asshole. Advice, maybe? well, honestly i’m inclined to call someone who’s attempting to gatekeep or police someone else’s identity an asshole myself, so… that said, there are a few things i want to comment on even though i think that you and i are already on the same page about these things. your mutual friend indeed has no right to even suggest that your friend is identifying the “wrong” way. their comment is…

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    Vesper H.

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    April 5, 2018
  • Q&A

    Q&A: “Did you go to college?”

    November 28, 2015 / No Comments

    anonymous said: Did you go to college? If so what did you get your degree in? i did! i have a Bachelors of Arts in Applied Linguistics with a minor in Japanese. now if only i could go back to school… sigh.

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  • [A]sexuality,  [Random] Thoughts,  Queer[ness]

    on today’s episode of #ConversationsWithMom….!

    November 28, 2015 / No Comments

    ….so i just had another one of those crazy conversations with my mom (and my sister who was eavesdropping and repeatedly butting in) about sexuality that stemmed from her finally watching a documentary that i’d sent her about LGBTQ people in the black church. i mean seriously, it lasted over an hour and was all over damn place, so i’m not going to try to rehash what was actually said, but the highlights were: mom is still of the mindset that sexual orientation is a choice. she refuses to distinguish between sexual attraction (i used the word “chemistry” with her because she seemed to get that) and sexual behavior/actions one decides to take (or not take). ugh. both mom and my sister think that “everyone is bisexual” because everyone could choose to have sex with someone of the same gender if they wanted to. bi erasure runs in my family, apparently. mom…

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    Vesper H.

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    May 17, 2013

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    October 10, 2016
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VESPER H.

YouTuber & Blogger

Queer As Cat is the blog and YouTube channel of Vesper, an American expat currently living in Japan.
reoccurring topics include: #asexuality, #nonbinary, #queerness #blackness & #mentalhealth

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Recent Posts

  • literal “social distancing” from the ace community April 1, 2020
  • legalized weed in America: one of many chips on my Black shoulder March 7, 2020
  • willpower, sweat, and tears January 30, 2020
  • 🎬 QAC 79 – The Neverending Queer-y: My Queer Ace Journey || LGBT YouTube & COPPA January 4, 2020
  • #YouTubeIsOverParty: COPPA & The Hypocrisy of YouTube December 15, 2019

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