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Queer As Cat

gender・ sexuality・ race ・intersectionality

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  • Home
  • About
    • About QAC
    • About Vesper
  • Photos
    • Instagram
    • Tokyo Rainbow Pride
      • 2014
      • 2015
      • 2016
      • 2017
      • 2018
  • Resources
    • Asexual POC Resources
    • #LGBTQIA in Japan
  • Contact

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  • [A]sexuality,  Gender[queer],  Queer[ness],  YouTube[r]

    QAC 54 – Confusing Gender Envy & Admiration with Attraction || Non-Binary | Asexual

    October 10, 2016 / No Comments

    it’s come to my attention recently that some feelings that i assummed were attraction may have not been attraction at all, but rather “gender envy” or “gender admiration”– feelings of admiration or envy towards someone else’s gender be it their self-expression, gender identity, (lack of) gender roles or socially imposed gender norms– anything pertaining to a person’s gender. never heard of gender envy or gender admiration before…? i’m not surprised, since i just pulled the terms out of my ass for lack of a better way of referring to these gender feels that i’m attempting to navigate. as someone who’s both non-binary and asexual i feel like both of these things have played a part in me mistaking gender envy / admiration for attraction. this is something that i’m just now beginning to give thought to, so please bear with me as i stumble around trying to talk about things.…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    May 1, 2019

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    May 17, 2016

    DIY ace flag, anyone?

    May 6, 2016
  • Q&A

    Q&A: “Do you have any dating advice for a fellow ace person?”

    October 10, 2016 / No Comments

    aarusiel said: Hey, Vesper. Do you have any dating advice for a fellow ace person? I feel like all I ever do is end up hurting the other person because I can’t meet their needs sexually. Is it better to just not date?   …i’m afraid that i’m probably one of the least suitable people to answer this question for a variety of reasons. that said, i don’t think that there’s any reason for you to not date. when it comes to any kind of relationship, a big part of avoiding false expectations and assumptions that can lead to hurt feelings– and make no mistake, it’s that (imho) that’s the cause of the other person’s hurt feelings, not you being unable to compromise yourself for them– is communication. if you talk to each other and you make your boundaries clear (which can be done without actually coming out as ace,…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    “the ace community goes overboard with words?” i.e. word vomitted “nah”

    April 5, 2018

    Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”

    February 23, 2016
  • [A]sexuality,  [Random] Thoughts,  Gender[queer],  Japan[ese],  Queer[ness]

    …one of many examples of why navigating セクマイ / LGBTQIA spaces in Japan can be painful at times.

    October 7, 2016 / No Comments

    first the context: the above screenshot is from the registration form for a meetup that i’ll be attending that is exclusively for trans men and non-binary people who are AFAB who have not medically transitioned in any way. the meetup is being hosted by a group that itself is a support group for trans men and non-binary people who are AFAB and who have not medically transitioned in any way + their partners………..

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    fuck your Oppression Olympics

    September 15, 2016

    …so this happened at TRP today.

    May 7, 2016
  • Q&A

    Q&A: “Excuse, but are you truscum?”

    October 5, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said:  I asking because I’m afraid to follow you in case you are truscum. no, anon, i am not truscum. in other words:

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”

    February 23, 2016

    “the ace community goes overboard with words?” i.e. word vomitted “nah”

    April 5, 2018
  • Feedback

    Feedback: “I’m so glad you posted your experience about being a black, nonbinary person who’s…”

    October 4, 2016 /

    nocombatjustwombats said: I’m so glad you posted your experience about being a black, nonbinary person who’s dealt with trauma online. All of today I’ve been feeling alone and misunderstood, and your post made me feel great. Thanks so much for putting yourself out there for kids like me. ?❤?   …and reading this ask has made my night. thank you. this means a lot coming from you. <3

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”

    February 23, 2016
  • [Random] Thoughts,  Gender[queer],  Japan[ese],  Queer[ness]

    本の紹介:「Xジェンダーって何?」

    October 4, 2016 / No Comments

    screaming! rushing out the door on my way to work i found a totally unexpected package in my mail box which turned out to be this book! the first ever (in so far as i know) book in Japan written by, about and for non-binary people in Japan! the book is the product of crowdfunding by the non-binary group Label X well over a year ago and i totally forgot that the book was said to be released around now. the book isn’t available on Amazon (not at the moment anyway), but it can be found online here and the book will be sold in bookstores! how amazing is that?! really is exciting times right now. 🙂 i’m at work right now so can’t look over the book at all and will be working overtime all week, but i look forward to checking out the book more thoroughly this weekend.…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    one of many reasons why “QUEER” means so much to me.

    September 23, 2016

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    July 6, 2017

    QAC 10 – Gender Dysphoria & Body Mods

    July 6, 2013
  • [A]sexuality,  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A: “The term platonic attraction confuses me. Is it somehow different from what people usually think of as friendship?”

    October 3, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: The term platonic attraction confuses me. Is it somehow different from what people usually think of as friendship? Does it mean someone you would want to be in a queerplatonic with? you’re far from the only one who’s confused by the term “platonic attraction”, anon. imho, such confusion and misunderstanding is partially to blame for why some people are quick to make light of terms like “panplatonic”, “aplatonic”, etc. such confusion and misunderstanding is also part of the reason why some people prefer to use other terms instead. the word “platonic” is defined by the Merriam-Webster Dictionary as referring to “a close relationship in which there is no romance or sex.” that said, historically the word and its usage used to be far more nuanced than it often is in modern society. there are literally an infinite number of ways in which a close relationship without romance (with or without sex) could manifest…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    November 25, 2017

    landscapes and fissures: navigating ace terminology in Japanese & English

    June 1, 2018

    IF {subcommunity building} THEN {…?}

    March 11, 2019
  • [A]sexuality,  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A not Q&A: “i’m aromantic and i use alterous as an identity and a form of attraction because identifying as panplatonic…”

    October 2, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: i’m aromantic and i use alterous as an identity and a form of attraction because identifying as panplatonic e.g. is looked down upon a Lot in the community. it’s the special-snowflake-mogai-tumblr-a-spec-uwu kind of stuff that non a-spec people demonize and it makes me feel icky to identify as such but i still want to express my identity? so i use alterous (re: this post) …ah, yes. the whole “everyone’s panplatonic because everyone makes friends regardless of gender! stop trying so hard to be oppressed you special snowflake lulz” that i’ve seen some ‘discoursers’ spout. usually the same people who also make fun of aplatonic as a term. i totally support you and anyone else who uses alterous for themself regardless of the reason for doing so, anon. at the same time, i can’t help but be annoyed / pissed off that some people’s ignorance has made another identity feel inaccessible…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    QAC 34 – Distancing Yourself From Family

    February 16, 2015

    🎬 QAC 79 – The Neverending Queer-y: My Queer Ace Journey || LGBT YouTube & COPPA

    January 4, 2020

    Japanese gender / queer theory, anyone?

    May 22, 2017
  • Feedback

    Feedback: “Why are you so cool?”

    September 29, 2016 /

    anonymous said: Why are you so cool? *looks around slowly* ………………….who? me?? but thank you, anon. <3

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”

    February 23, 2016
  • [Random] Thoughts

    done and done.

    September 27, 2016 / No Comments

    just submitted my absentee ballot for the upcoming US general election….! this is my third time voting in a general election from abroad, but it’s the first time that i’ve been able to do so online. thank you, Nevada, for sucking less this year! took you long enough, goddamn. if Trump wins this election, i fucking swear to Cat God….

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    June 1, 2014

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    April 21, 2016

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    October 13, 2013
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VESPER H.

YouTuber & Blogger

Queer As Cat is the blog and YouTube channel of Vesper, an American expat currently living in Japan.
reoccurring topics include: #asexuality, #nonbinary, #queerness #blackness & #mentalhealth

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Recent Posts

  • literal “social distancing” from the ace community April 1, 2020
  • legalized weed in America: one of many chips on my Black shoulder March 7, 2020
  • willpower, sweat, and tears January 30, 2020
  • 🎬 QAC 79 – The Neverending Queer-y: My Queer Ace Journey || LGBT YouTube & COPPA January 4, 2020
  • #YouTubeIsOverParty: COPPA & The Hypocrisy of YouTube December 15, 2019

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