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Queer As Cat

gender・ sexuality・ race ・intersectionality

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  • Home
  • About
    • About QAC
    • About Vesper
  • Photos
    • Instagram
    • Tokyo Rainbow Pride
      • 2014
      • 2015
      • 2016
      • 2017
      • 2018
  • Resources
    • Asexual POC Resources
    • #LGBTQIA in Japan
  • Contact

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  • [A]sexuality,  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A: “I identify as gray-ace, but it feels too vague to me and causes unnecessary worries to my partner…”

    June 20, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: Hi Vesper! I identify as gray-ace, but it feels too vague to me and causes unnecessary worries to my partner about pushing me to do things I don’t really want (that never happens). I haven’t been able to find a more specific term. I do feel sexual attraction, so much that it’s obvious to me, but only when I decide I want to feel it in an interaction with someone. Cupio and recipro don’t fit. I call it conveniosexual as a joke because it is convenient, but is there an existing word? …i really hate to say this, but if your partner is concerned about pushing you to do things that you don’t really want to do, it seems unlikely to me that changing your identity would at all be a solution for that. forgive me if i’m out of line for saying this, but i’m doubtful that…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    …annnd that’s a wrap!

    May 7, 2017

    QAC 41 – Am I Asexual? | Never Too Young To Know

    October 18, 2015

    1978 Call Out Culture Is Fierce…! lmao

    November 26, 2018
  • Feedback,  Mental [Un]health,  Q&A

    Q&A not Q&A: “you’re personality REALLY reminds me of me. I’m also what you call “apathetic as hell.””

    June 19, 2016 /

    anonymous said: you’re personality REALLY reminds me of me. I’m also what you call “apathetic as hell.” I just think you can catch more flies with honey. People shut down if you automatically start tearing them down. You don’t build yourself (& others) up by tearing someone (& others) down. PLUS you’ll NEVER get them to understand what you’re talking about if you attack them back because they’ll be in their defensive mindset. It’s effective in helping people evolve. It’s also important to pick your fights. If you’re constantly fighting not only are you going to drain yourself but people will start to take your fighting level as a basic level of how you react to things and they’ll take you less seriously. Also some people do screw up and don’t realize it; informing them on the issue and helping them improve themselves is better than just throwing them under…

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    Vesper H.

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    Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”

    February 23, 2016
  • Feedback

    Feedback: “I’m trying to understand more LGBTQIA issues and you’re blog is really helping me.”

    June 19, 2016 /

    anonymous said: post/140747818071/my-friend-i-both-identify-as-queer-women-she-is <- this was a great post you clarified so much for me THANK YOU. I’ve been trying to understand this kind of issue. I’m asexual, aromantic, and sex repulsed so it’s a blurred perspective for these kinds of topics but I’m trying to understand more LGBTQIA issues and you’re blog is really helping me. It sucks that’s it’s difficult to find a legit discussion about these kinds of topics on tumblr but hey… it’s tumblr. (the post in question) honored to be of any help to you, anon. the a problem with Tumblr is that even if there is serious discussion about important things going on on this site, it can be impossible to find it because of the way Tumblr is setup and that sucks as much as the apparently lack of serious discussions at times… sigh.

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”

    February 23, 2016
  • [A]sexuality,  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A not Q&A: “Have you seen that post going around saying the being asexual is a modifier not an orientation?”

    June 18, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: Have you seen that post going around saying the being asexual is a modifier not an orientation? It also seemed to imply that asexuality is a choice? I’m really tired of misinformation about asexuals being spread around. …mmm, no i have not seen the post in question, but a quick search has brought up this post (warning: offensive ignorance is offensive) that i’m guessing might be the one you’re referring to…? was posted about 20hrs ago (i received this ask 4hrs ago) and yet has somehow already amassed 200 notes without a single critic of its content in sight. the spreading of misinformation (maliciously or not) is annoying indeed. that said, i just so happen to be Apathetic As Hell about what others think and am very confident and comfortable in my identity as an asexual, so it’s pretty easy for me to not give a damn about…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    City of Philadelphia unveils Pride flag with brown and black stripes

    August 4, 2017

    『[4コマ]☆ノンセクシュアル☆』

    May 25, 2016

    botched allyship & language barriers #TRP2017

    May 11, 2017
  • [A]sexuality,  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A: “why are pan and bi both terms if they can mean the same thing?”

    June 14, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: okay. so. why are pan and bi both terms if they can mean the same thing? (i have googled this, trust me) …gonna take a stab in the dark and guess that this is in response to this post where no one ever said that they mean the same thing. well fear not, confused anon! unlike Google, i have an entire tag (or four) dedicated to your very question! may i direct you, dear anon, to my #bi vs pan tag in particular, as well as to these two posts in that tag: “what’s the difference between bi and pan?” (hint: there is a difference) “why does it matter if the definitions of bisexuality overlap with the definitions of…?” (hint: it doesn’t matter) and no, lovely anon, my sarcasm is not meant as condescension! i just found the tone of your ask mildly annoying, so i thought i might as well jump onto…

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    Vesper H.

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    QAC 55 – Older Asexuals: Coming Out Later In Life | Questioning | Trauma

    October 23, 2016

    QAC 36 – What Acephobia & Asexual Erasure Looks Like

    April 27, 2015

    DIY ace flag, anyone?

    May 6, 2016
  • Gender[queer],  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A: “have you read any books with non-binary characters in them?”

    June 14, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: Hey, Vesper, have you read any books with non-binary characters in them? I found several on amazon Kindle, which is super exciting, but I’m also kinda wary of them. i’m afraid i haven’t had the time or energy to read much of anything for a long while now, so i haven’t read anything with non-binary characters in it apart from webcomics… i can’t personally vouch for the content of any of these lists, but perhaps these book lists from GoodReads.com and the reviews on them will help you find quality books to read? Non-Binary and Genderqueer Characters in YA Fiction Non-Binary (Genderqueer, Genderfluid, Gender-Unspecified, etc) Fiction and Memoirs Gender Non-Binary Fantasy & Science Fiction oh, and: 17 Pathbreaking Non-Binary and Gender-Fluid Novels (not from GoodReads) i totally understand being wary or apprehensive of reading anything with a supposed non-binary character in it. :/ i’d be inclined to research the…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    “Gender is a Much More Beautifully Complex Thing Than Society Would Have You Believe”- Ditch the Label

    October 18, 2016

    “maverique” v2.0

    June 15, 2014

    QAC 21 – Gender Identity & Feminism

    January 3, 2014
  • [Random] Thoughts,  Japan[ese],  Mental [Un]health,  Queer[ness]

    Pulse.

    June 13, 2016 / No Comments

    …as if dealing with the news itself and the media’s handling of it isn’t enough, i’m going to have to go through the week (and for however long after) listening to lots of opinions and commentary on the event that i would really rather do without, all while keeping my own feelings and opinion in check because, you know. that’s the nature of my job. somehow i’m going to have to muster up the energy to up my game with my Everything’s Okay face this week. …i’m exhausted already just thinking about it. ugh.

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    “”two genders””

    December 30, 2016

    QAC 45 – Forced Out of the Closet: 2 Years Later | Coming Out Again (Non-Binary Bi / Pan Asexual)

    January 26, 2016

    my #WakandaForever✊? is not your #WakandaForever✊

    April 21, 2018
  • [A]sexuality,  Gender[queer],  Queer[ness],  YouTube[r]

    QAC 50 – Biphobia x Non-Binary Erasure x Binarism || Bi Non-Binary People Exist

    June 12, 2016 / No Comments

    everyone experiences the intersection(s) of their gender and their sexuality in different ways, but i’ve seen little thought or attention given to how a biphobia affects bi non-binary people even within bi communities, despite the fact that non-binary erasure and binarism often occur hand-in-hand with biphobia. in this video i give air to three (3) of my biggest frustrations or ‘pet-peeves’ regarding intersections of biphobia, non-binary erasure and binarism that i experience both within and outside of the LGBTQIA+ community. ========JUMP SPOTS ========== @ 01:00 ~ 1. insisting on defining bi(sexuality) as attraction to both / two genders hint: some bi people define their bi identity in this way and that is entirely valid, however these definitions are no longer the most common ones among bi people for reasons. @ 03:55 ~ 2. claiming that bi(sexuality) is inherently binarist hint: stop using the existence of non-binary people as a means…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    The Hypocrisy of YouTube: i.e. Why YouTube Is A Pink Capitalist Piece Of Shit

    #YouTubeIsOverParty: COPPA & The Hypocrisy of YouTube

    December 15, 2019

    「やがて君になる」/ “Yagate Kimi ni Naru”: an aro/ace coded, sapphic ‘love story’…?

    October 8, 2018

    QAC 01 – Introduction

    May 11, 2013
  • Gender[queer],  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A: “I am having trouble with my gender, and am looking for some advice?”

    June 12, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: I am having trouble with my gender, and am looking for some advice? I was AFAB, but was stuck in a disgustingly misogynistic environment from the time I was 9 (19 now) until just a few months ago. For the past several years, I’ve had a strong aversion to anything stereotypically seen as “female,” and experienced a lot of issues with the way my body is seen. I’ve tried using every other pronoun set and gender I can think of, and none of them make me feel any better. I don’t know what to do. if you don’t had any animosity or otherwise negative feelings towards your name, you could ask people to always refer to you by your name instead of pronouns. some people prefer to go by their name until they find a pronoun that feels right to them and others go by their name indefinitely,…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    Tokyo Rainbow Pride 2016 (5/8/2016)

    May 14, 2016

    botched allyship & language barriers #TRP2017

    May 11, 2017

    “maverique” v2.0

    June 15, 2014
  • [A]sexuality,  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A: “I’ve IDed as aromantic for a while, but I’m very confused.”

    June 10, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: Question!! I’ve IDed as aromantic for a while, but I’m very confused. I think I like quioromantic, but also I feel like idemromantic could apply. Since the two are similar, how would I decide which is more accurate in describing myself? Thanks! -Cio Oh! And also, does it make sense for me to want/be in a romantic relationship even if I (don’t know if I) feel romantic attraction? If one of my close friends asked me on a date I’d quickly agree, but is that fair to them? -Cio i often suggest to people to try an identity / label ‘on for size’ to see how it ‘fits’. sometimes it’s hard to know whether something feels ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ to you just from read definitions and researching the experiences of others who identify as the identity / label that you’re interested in. sometimes things become a lot clearer more quickly by…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    …one of many examples of why navigating セクマイ / LGBTQIA spaces in Japan can be painful at times.

    October 7, 2016

    spotted: LGBT 101 on Japanese TV

    February 21, 2015

    gender non-conformity sure does make for good entertainment for cis people, huh Japan?

    April 25, 2016
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VESPER H.

YouTuber & Blogger

Queer As Cat is the blog and YouTube channel of Vesper, an American expat currently living in Japan.
reoccurring topics include: #asexuality, #nonbinary, #queerness #blackness & #mentalhealth

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Recent Posts

  • literal “social distancing” from the ace community April 1, 2020
  • legalized weed in America: one of many chips on my Black shoulder March 7, 2020
  • willpower, sweat, and tears January 30, 2020
  • 🎬 QAC 79 – The Neverending Queer-y: My Queer Ace Journey || LGBT YouTube & COPPA January 4, 2020
  • #YouTubeIsOverParty: COPPA & The Hypocrisy of YouTube December 15, 2019

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