Snapchat rant #163
…meanwhile, i went to an Xジェンダーオフ会 / non-binary meetup in Tokyo and snapped parts of my day on Snapchat. thought it might be interesting to some.
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せーの、よっしゃー！ real life social networking (その②)
so a few weeks ago i unloaded my anxiety on here about going to a ジェンダーフリー / “gender free” party in Tokyo. well, it’s been a few days since the party and after a huge rant like that, you all deserve an update. plus i met another ace today and you’ll never guess what happened.
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…the things i do to not be a ひきこもり (その①)
ahhh, okay so i just need to vent. feel free to ignore this. someone in an Xジェンダー (Japanese non-binary) group that i’m in posted a link to a party being held in Tokyo on the 26th. there’s often some kinda of gay (literally always with fine print saying ‘men only’) or lesbian (literally always with fine print saying ‘women only’) event going on in Tokyo. more recently there are events aimed at trans men– but anyway, the point is i’m none of those things. and i haven’t really cared that much because i’m the definition of introversion. i have zero interest in night life and all of these events always happen at night. why is it that LGBTQ events more often than not involve late nights, loud music and copious amounts of alcohol??? moving on.
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one day
doodled a thing about wanting to be (more) active in the LGBTQIA community, but depression getting in the way zzz…
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”Daily ? UGHs”
random doodle about random things that i hear my students say to each other or that they say to me on any given day that make me go UGH. “SHE’s 30 and not married! lol” “you don’t have kids??” “don’t worry, you still have time! (to get married, have kids)” “lol T-chan もしかしてお前オカマ？！ (don’t tell me you’re a tranny!)” “sensei’s on OUR team!” “but you’re a girl!” “キモイ！ホモかよ？！ (eww! what are you, a homo?!)” “only girls would understand, right *given name*!” and the saddest, most frustrating part is that most of this is said by kids under 10 years old…
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just got back from a local LGBT meetup…
25 or so people where there, 2 of which were gaijin/foreigners to my surprise! w00t! we went to a national park nearby, saw the sights and had a picnic. i had a great time, much more so than the last meetup i went to. that said, every single time i meet up with a group of cis LGB+ people i’m reminded how much they really don’t understand / know. even if they’re really awesome people who are really kind and with whom you can discuss other stuff with, when it comes to stuff that’s trans and/or non-binary related… yeah. no. now that i’ve successfully gotten my foot in the door with the local LGB community, i really hope to connect more with the T and non-binary/gender variant part of the community… 茨城県ではXジェンダーの人が意外に多いらしい。今から頑張って地本のXジェンダーやトランスの人と繋ぎたいと思う。(*￣ー￣)
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QAC 35 – Body Image: An Intersection of Black, Non-binary & Asexual Identity
trigger warning: body negativity, gender dysphoria, hints of self-harm, cursing a rant about my own negative body image and how that body image intersects with my identity as a black non-binary asexual. i touch upon a lot in this long video, so for your ease of viewing: ====== Time Points ======== @00:00 – introduction @00:57 – dismissal of my body issues @02:18 – height and dysphoria @05:08 – having lordosis and being misgendered @09:53 – hypersexualization of my butt as a black non-binary ace @12:44 – hypersexualization of my lips as a black non-binary ace @13:27 – self-destructive habits: lip picking @15:33 – hating my natural hair @19:00 – body modification and body positivity @21:16 – i’d love to hear from you ======================== “awkward but necessary” pretty much sums up this video.
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QAC 34 – Distancing Yourself From Family
dealing with family can be tough. really tough. it took many years for me to finally realize and admit to myself that i have been coping by physically distancing myself from my family and this has actually helped me a lot over the years. to those of you out there struggling while living with your family, i hope this video will be of encouragement to you. no matter how bleak things may seem at times, stay strong. you can get through it! i had no idea what to do for this video’s thumbnail, so there you go.
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a convo with 10yo students (100% unedited)
student K: sensei, do you have kids? me: ….??? NO. student K: why not? me: because i don’t. do your work. student K: sensei, you’re almost 30! you have to get married! me: …..why do you remember my age and why are /you/ telling me this??? student K: *cheeky grin* because everyone gets married and has kids by 30, of course! students H & D: *nod in agreement* me: ……… *face in hand*
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rant: name change + expat pains
the desire to legally change my name to Vesper is steadily growing….. but the more i think about the actual process, the more i curse being an expat. ;( being an expat makes so many things dually difficult.
