a blurb about labels, their importance and why i use them. because i talk too damn much: @00:00 – update about my mom @00:52 – labels: more than just identity @05:22 – labels can suck @07:08 – why labels are important & why i use them i’m a little crazy in the beginning, but i swear i start making sense towards the end. ;(
long video is ridiculously long. sorry about that, but i had to vent somewhere. ====== NAVIGATION ===== @00:00 – and the story begins @04:46 – “i’m asexual.” @10:02 – “imma watch all your obviously private videos!” @14:06 – “don’t worry, everyone’s like that!” @17:05 – “omg stop saying that.” @22:00 – patience is golden @24:32 – her head didn’t exploded ====================== TL;DW: my mom found this channel and saw videos that i never wanted her to see and wasn’t ready for her to see. shit sucks. BUT my mom is doing her best with what she’s found out, which is good… even if her best is painful. anyway, patience patience….. and all that jazz. the cat’s out of the bag and is managing well enough thus far. hopefully time won’t make the cat regret being out of the bag…………… and i forgot to mention in the video that my mom…
GENDER it isn’t black & white no matter how much you want it to be …i made this for several reasons. it bothers me when i see someone’s gender identity being ignored, erased or invalidated for any reason*. it bothers me when i see people bitching about there being “too many labels” just because they themselves lack the need for them. it bothers me when i see people both within and outside of the LGBTQIA community (esp. within the genderqueer and non-binary communities) trying so hard to define this and that that they begin to paint things black & white, oversimplifying things to the point of erasing the shades of gray that so many people actually find comfort in. it bothers me when someone feels that they have the right to tell someone else that they aren’t the gender that they identify as because they don’t want to transition medically,…
so, there’s a thread on AVEN that opens like this… A new (to me) concept was recently thrown in my path. It’s the idea that there are sex orientations as well as gender orientations; ie that sex is not strictly what you physically look like, but what you want to look like (sexual characteristics-wise). For example, neutrois would count as a sex orientation, not a gender one; neutrois, as I understand it, is a desire to present as neutrally as possible, with the characteristics of neither binary sex. However, agender and genderless are gender orientations, because they specifically refer to the construct of gender, not physical aspects. This made a lot of sense to me, intuitively. It allows us to think of a single person as both neutrois and agender, to follow the above examples. Or neutrois and demi-guy, or androgynous man, or female agender, or any combination. I’m wondering how many…
i’ve never identified as a feminist and yet when it came to questioning my gender identity i somehow felt guilty for wanting to identify as anything other than my assigned gender, ie female. was i betraying myself? someone else? women everywhere?? i guess my relationship with feminism was and will always be more complicated than i’d thought. surely it’s not just me?
…it’s really depressing thinking about all the money i’m going to have to save up and then spend just to do away with something that i don’t need nor want. …and then it’s depressing thinking about all the people out there who’d love to have this thing that i don’t need/want. SIGH.
goodbye 2013 and good riddance! in this video i talk about my goals for 2014, including coping with depression/dysphoria through cycling, getting connected with Japan’s LGBTQIA community and saving money for a hysterectomy. i also talk about my (lack of) transitioning and my new name! a huge THANK YOU! to all of my followers and subscribers! there’s undoubtedly lots more videos to come in 2014. 🙂
while randomly watching videos on YouTube i came across the vlog of a Japanese FtX (their words, not mine) person. i was so happy that i immediately started typing a comment introducing myself, but when it came to saying that i’m neutrois i couldn’t figure out how to say it. see, Japanese kind of sucks…. there is no word to distinguish between SEX and GENDER– the both equate to 性 (sei). i dare say that the entire concept of gender vs sex is lacking in Japan, but that’s a topic for another time. i thought that maybe neutrois could be translated as 無性者 (museisha; literally translates to “person without sex/gender”) but apparently that’s used to mean asexual! wtffffff….. so then i thought that maybe i could say 中立性者 (chuuritsuseisha), which literally translates to “neutral person” but apparently 中立性 (chuuritsusei) is used in regards to having a neutral stance on any given thing and so wouldn’t really be used specifically for gender despite 性 (sei)…
sorry for being MIA for so long. in this video on blurb on and on about various random things that i have seen or experienced in Japan thus far. in short, work is going well and my piercings + attempts at gender neutral attire have all gone over fine thus far. more interesting videos to come in the future!
choosing a new name is really hard for anyone, but it seems especially hard choosing a gender neutral name. for one, is any name ever truly gender neutral…? there’s so much that goes into gendering a name that i think it’s impossible to really say. either way, because i’m so picky i find myself with very few options to choose from…
