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Queer As Cat

gender・ sexuality・ race ・intersectionality

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  • Home
  • About
    • About QAC
    • About Vesper
  • Photos
    • Instagram
    • Tokyo Rainbow Pride
      • 2014
      • 2015
      • 2016
      • 2017
      • 2018
  • Resources
    • Asexual POC Resources
    • #LGBTQIA in Japan
  • Contact

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  • Gender[queer],  Japan[ese],  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A: “Are there any (commonly used?) gender neutral pronouns in Japanese like there are in English?”

    September 7, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: Are there any (commonly used?) gender neutral pronouns in Japanese like there are in English? I love your blog btw, your posts about Japanese are fascinating 🙂 (see also: this post) ah, thank you! although at this point i feel the need to throw out a huge disclaimer. [image reads: i’m totally a non-fluent, non-native speaker of Japanese and as such, i might not even know wtf i’m talking about! :’D but thank you for asking anyway! – Vesper] anyway, i’m inclined to say no, there are no gender neutral pronouns in Japanese like there are in English. in English, “gender neutral pronouns” generally refers to third-person pronouns used by one person to refer to another person. in Japanese, third-person pronouns aren’t used anywhere near as frequently as in English and it’s relatively easy to avoid gendering a person without using actual third-person pronouns at all, making gender neutral third-person…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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  • Gender[queer],  Q&A

    Q&A not Q&A: “I’m a female androgyne & clothes are a problem for me.”

    September 6, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: Hi. I really like your style. I’m a female androgyne & clothes are a problem for me. I’m skinny & short & I like men’s clothes but they don’t fit me because they are all too big for me. So I hate how I look like. I see pictures on the internet with beautiful women wearing great men’s clothes, they are divine but where I live there’s not a single shop for genderqueer. When I’m trying to tell this to someone, girls are telling me that with my body I can wear what I want. Yes… in a shop for women thanks, anon. 🙂 i totally share your frustration when it comes to shopping for clothes…. i, too, prefer clothes that tend to be in “men’s” sections. i’m also (very) short and have more curves than i care to admit… that, combined with how selective and uncompromising i…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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  • Gender[queer],  Japan[ese],  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A: “How do I tell someone I’m non-binary in Japanese?”

    September 4, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: How do I tell someone I’m non-binary in Japanese?

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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  • Q&A

    Q&A: “do they pronouns work like plural or singular?”

    September 3, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: Hi sorry to bother you, english is not my first language and i always get confused, do they pronouns work like plural or singular? I mean talking about a nb person u say “they is very pretty” or “they are very pretty”? not a problem, anon. 🙂 even when ‘they’ is used to talk about a single person, it is still used in almost the exact same way as it would be used to talk about multiple people. in other words, it is grammatically plural. subjective: they are very pretty. objective: i hugged them. possessive determiner: their smile makes me happy. possessive pronoun: the choice is theirs. reflexive: they are proud of themself.* * the only difference is that the reflexive form of plural ‘they’ is ‘themselves’ (eg. ‘they are proud of themselves’). some people use ‘themselves’ even for singular ‘they’ when talking about a single person, but i prefer ‘themself’. hope this helps.

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”

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  • Gender[queer],  Q&A

    Q&A: “Do you know any non-binary pronouns besides they/them?”

    September 3, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: I am pronoun-confused. Do you know any non-binary pronouns besides they/them? there are many, many gender neutral pronouns in the English language besides they / them / their. to throw out a few of them as examples: co / co / cos e(y) / em / eir ne / nem / nir ve / ver / vis xe / xem / xyr ze / hir / hir again, those are just a few. see list of gender neutral pronouns on Wiktionary.org for even more pronouns. there’s also more detailed information about the history and usage of various gender neutral pronouns in English (and other languages) on Nonbinary.org’s wiki. last but not least, there’s also the option of using no pronouns at all, which many people seem to forget is even an option. if knowing how to use certain pronouns is confusing or difficult for you, you may be interested in checking out…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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  • Q&A

    Q&A: “I wanted to ask if there were any gender neutral ways to imply that someone is your child that isn’t the word “child”…”

    August 24, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: Hi Vesper! First off i’d like to say that you’re amazing and very inspirational to me :). I wanted to ask if there were any gender neutral ways to imply that someone is your child that isn’t the word “child”. As an adult that prefers neutral pronouns, I don’t find it fitting for my parents to refer to me as a child. How would you prefer your parents to refer to you in that circumstance? hello, anon. thank you for the kind words. 🙂 personally, even though i’m an adult, i don’t particularly mind being referred to as “child” so long as it’s within the context of a relationship between a parent and their offspring. unlike “kid” which would really rub me the wrong way regardless of who’s using it in what context, “child” when used by my parents in reference to me feels more about me being their offspring then…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”

    February 23, 2016
  • Q&A

    Q&A not Q&A: “maybe anon has a problem with compulsory heterosexuality…”

    August 22, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: maybe anon has a problem with compulsory heterosexuality / the fact that they were raised to be available to men? I have a similar problem – logically I don’t CARE if men find me attractive, and yet I can’t stop fretting over not being “acceptable” to them. I don’t have this problem with other people even though men are the group I’m actually least interested in. I hate this and I’m trying to let go of this feeling, but it’s hard. (re: this post) that thought occurred to me, but i didn’t want to make assumptions about anon’s gender or even their AGAB, so i erred on the side of giving general commentary with that ask. but yeah, internalized heteronormativity and compulsory heterosexuality is definitely a thing that many people struggle with and anon may also be struggling with. it’s social programming that can be extremely difficult to…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”

    February 23, 2016

    “the ace community goes overboard with words?” i.e. word vomitted “nah”

    April 5, 2018
  • [A]sexuality,  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A: “im gay and ive known for like almost 2 years now but every time a guy talks to me i can’t help but…”

    August 22, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: hey so like im gay and ive known for like almost 2 years now but every time a guy talks to me i can’t help but ask for more attention or flirt back i have a problem w saying no a lot and maybe that’s why but is it normal ? hi, anon. i’m a bit confused by your ask and am not sure whether i’m understanding it correctly, but… a person can definitely enjoy receiving attention from someone and initiating / returning flirting with someone even if they’re not actually interested in that person in any way. some people enjoy / do those things with anyone and some people don’t, but either way it doesn’t necessarily say anything about you as a person or your sexuality. besides, you know yourself, anon. if you’re gay you’re gay! trust yourself. also, try not to compare your actions or feelings…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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  • Gender[queer],  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A: “I was wondering if it’s still possible to be nb if you present/have a mostly femme style.”

    August 20, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: I was wondering if it’s still possible to be nb if you present/have a mostly femme style. definitely. you can expressing yourself however you like and still be non-binary, anon. femme non-binary people are no less non-binary than anyone else.

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    Vesper H.

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  • Feedback,  Gender[queer],  Queer[ness]

    Feedback: “Thank you so much for your “let’s talk” post because these are things…”

    August 20, 2016 /

    anonymous said: Thank you so much for your “let’s talk” post because these are things I definitely have never thought about that way and you opened my eyes to that and I will try to keep all of it in mind. I also wanted to specifically thank you for writing it out in a post as well as having the youtube video because for me that’s a major accessibility thing and I never would have been able to comprehend it the same way by watching/listening to a video. (re: this post) no problem, anon! thank you for the feedback. 🙂 i’m trying to be more mindful of accessibility by adding captions to my videos (going to caption the latest video tonight or tomorrow), but at the same time i’m aware that even with captions a video can still be inaccessible or less accessible to people… plus some people just prefer…

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    Vesper H.

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    Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”

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VESPER H.

YouTuber & Blogger

Queer As Cat is the blog and YouTube channel of Vesper, an American expat currently living in Japan.
reoccurring topics include: #asexuality, #nonbinary, #queerness #blackness & #mentalhealth

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Recent Posts

  • literal “social distancing” from the ace community April 1, 2020
  • legalized weed in America: one of many chips on my Black shoulder March 7, 2020
  • willpower, sweat, and tears January 30, 2020
  • 🎬 QAC 79 – The Neverending Queer-y: My Queer Ace Journey || LGBT YouTube & COPPA January 4, 2020
  • #YouTubeIsOverParty: COPPA & The Hypocrisy of YouTube December 15, 2019

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