YouTube[r]
Posts featuring videos from my YouTube channel.
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QAC 65 – 1 Month on Low Dose HRT | Non-Binary | Mental Health || The T Files #005
voice cracking? increased stamina? mood swings?? it’s been one month since i started a relatively low dosage of testosterone and even though in actuality not much has happened yet, i’m still surprised by what has. it’s been an interesting month, but as it turns out starting low-dose T isn’t as simple as simply choosing a random low dosage and going with the recommended injection frequency. or at least, not when you’re trying to manage depression and anxiety on top of it all and you’re not sure fluctuating hormone levels are a risk that you want to take. one month later, while still happy with my decision to start T, it’s time to take a moment to pause. recap. and reevaluate. …my video descriptions sound like the back of a poorly written novel abandoned on the shelf with the tabloids in the checkout aisle because someone decided last minute that it…
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impostor.
…it’s always disconcerting to be reminded of how people seem to have an impression of me as a person / my personality that doesn’t at all reflect who i am in reality.
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QAC 64 – 48 Hours On T || Starting HRT In Japan || Non-Binary || The T Files #004
it’s only been 48 hours, but i’m finally on T! 62.5 mg/ml of Enarmon Depot (エナルモンデポー) every two weeks, to be specific. The T Files is a series of videos documenting my journey to get testosterone in Japan and wherever i may end up with it from there. while this series may be helpful for those who are interested in the process of getting HRT (more specifically, testosterone) in Japan, it’s also just my personal playlist of [shit]videos about my adventures with T for my own future reference. watch at your own digression. :p more like 72+ hours on T now, but who’s counting. only YouTube, who immediately flagged this video as inappropriate for some advertisers, presumably just because it had “testosterone” and “HRT” in it. sigh.
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Q&A: “what do you use for recording and editing your videos?”
anonymous said: If you don’t mind my asking, what do you use for recording and editing your videos? I’ve thought about doing youtube before but have little idea of what kinds of equipment to invest in. i don’t mind at all, anon. actually, i wouldn’t recommend investing too much, if anything at all, into YouTube starting out. a lot of people have really strong intentions starting out and rush out to buy a nice camera, but end up not continuing with their channel for whatever unforseen reason. also, until you’ve actually given YouTube a try, it’s hard to know what exactly works best for you in terms of equipment, setup, etc. having said all that, to finally answer your question, i use some relatively high-end equipment that isn’t at all what i started out with, nor what i’d recommend to someone just starting out. i have a Canon 5D Mark…
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QAC 63 – Story Time: Coming Out To A Coworker || Visibly Queer | Non-Binary || The T Files #003
ever tried to come out to someone only to be met with “i already knew that”? before last week, i couldn’t say that i have, but when a coworker thinks their “gaydar” is on-point, but that gaydar ever-so-predictably fails to extend beyond just “GAY”, mental eye rolling, story time and a mini word vomit ensue. what does it mean to be “visibly queer” and why is it that more often than not ‘queer’ is often taken to be synonymous with “gay”? and is there any such thing as “visibly trans” or “visibly non-binary”? don’t expect to find any answers here, as it took me considerable effort just to limit my apathetic word vomit to 5 minutes zzz… two days post-recording and much sleep deprivation later…
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QAC 62 – The Road To HRT: Fears, Goals & Compromise || Non-Binary || The T Files #002
when i first started this channel not long after having just began to explore and embrace my gender, i didn’t consider HRT / testosterone to even be a card on the table for me to play. HRT was something that others did and that i was judged for not wanting to do; it was for people who experienced “real”, bodily dysphoria, not people like me whose dysphoria was largely derivative of society and whose complicated relationship with the very idea of medically “transitioning” was used as a means of invalidation by others. i can’t help but imagine 2013 Vesper looking at 2017 Vesper with silent, candid irony as they brush aside the years of others’ bullshit to finally confront their own.
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QAC 61 – Non-Binary Gender Identity Disorder (GID) & HRT in Japan | The T Files #001
after years of whining and moaning about it, i’m finally doing it; i’ll be starting HRT soon– and in Japan, no less. 2014 Vesper, who made an entire video about NOT “transitioning” in Japan, is eating their words. what’s made me change my mind now? how does one start HRT in Japan? as a non-binary person?? Gender Identity Disorder??? in this video, i talk about all the above, as well as recap the “highlights” of my recent appointment with a psychologist to get diagnosed with GID; a necessary first step to [legally] starting HRT from scratch in Japan. [ cw: vague sex mention @ 11:27 ~ 11:55; reproductive body stuff ] …took me long enough to get this video up, geez.
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QAC 60 – Race, Culture & [A]sexuality: Support Asexual People Of Color
Asexual Awareness Week is a week set aside in October to not only show your pride as an asexual person, but to help raise awareness of asexuality and asexual people. sadly, some of the people who are most in need of increased awareness and resources are those who go unnoticed even within the asexual community itself. it’s no secret that the Asexual Community, particularly in English-speaking countries, has a Whiteness Problem. or at least, i hope that it isn’t. there is more often than not a distinct lack of racial / ethnic diversity in asexual communities and spaces, which is why it ought to surprise no one that there is also a lack of resources and even awareness among fellow aces about the unique and diverse struggles and needs of aces of color. with the bulk of asexual awareness, resources and discourse revolving around white faces and common narratives that…
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QAC 59 – Antidepressants 3 Months Later | BetterHelp: Online Therapy| World Mental Health Day
did you know that October 10th is World Mental Health Day? i’ve recently tried out BetterHelp.com, a great resource for online therapy. if you’re interested in trying online therapy or looking for a new therapist, check it out maybe? it’s been over 3 months since i started antidepressants. i made a video about my [mis]adventures with turning to professional help via medication for the first time back in July. it being World Mental Health Day and all, now’s the perfect time to finally update you all on the continuation of my [mis]adventures in mental health shit– now with an added dab of online therapy on top! in the interest of complete transparency, this video is a sponsored by BetterHelp and the above link is my personal referral link and anything generated from it will come back to me. that said, i would only ever accept sponsorship on a video if…
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Q&A: “What mic do you use to record your videos?”
anonymous said: Hi Vesper! What mic do you use to record your videos? hi anon. 🙂 i’ve been using a RØDE VideoMic Pro for the past 10 months because for awhile i lived in a very noisy apartment and the street noise in all of my videos finally got to me. no matter what i did, the camera’s built-in mic was just too good at picking up ambient noise from outside my apartment. that said, for 3 years prior to that i used the camera’s built-in mic and the built-in mic was fine until i moved to the paper-thin-walled apartment. generally speaking, external mics tend to be unnecessary, especially when just starting out on YouTube, because built-in mics tend to be decent these days. that said, if you do find yourself needing an external mic, there’s no reason to fork out the kind of cash that i did for mine. there are…
