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Queer As Cat

gender・ sexuality・ race ・intersectionality

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  • Home
  • About
    • About QAC
    • About Vesper
  • Photos
    • Instagram
    • Tokyo Rainbow Pride
      • 2014
      • 2015
      • 2016
      • 2017
      • 2018
  • Resources
    • Asexual POC Resources
    • #LGBTQIA in Japan
  • Contact

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  • Feedback,  Gender[queer],  Q&A

    Q&A: “I’m the anon reading lexicons in order to find a word…”

    August 2, 2016 /

    anonymous said: I’m the anon reading lexicons in order to find a word to describe myself. Thank you very much for taking so much time for me, for your long, very interesting and helpful answer. In fact, I was only looking for a single word because everybody here seems to have one (they say ‘hi I’m this or that’) and it was driving me crazy that there wasn’t one for me. I thought everyone but me had a word that suited completely. You put my mind at ease. You’re right I should find my own combination of words. (re: this post) no problem, anon. thanks for coming back and responding. 🙂 even though it may feel like everyone has a particular word / identity / label that describes them completely, rest assured that that totally is not the case. not everyone is able to (or even wants to) put a…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”

    February 23, 2016
  • Gender[queer],  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A: ” can’t find a word that completely describes myself. Perhaps you can help.”

    August 1, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: Despite reading lexicons, I can’t find a word that completely describes myself. Perhaps you can help. Description of my person: AFAB, I love and I’m happy with my female body, don’t want a male body; crossdressing, men’s clothes, very feminine underwear, make-up, long hair, love my androgynous face. Psychologically sometimes really feel like I’m a man, sometimes quite like a girl, rarely completely like a girl. …this may make me come across as an ass, but i feel obligated to point out that you’re not going to find any one word that encompasses what just took you 46 words to convey. in fact, i’m sure that even those 46 words are only scratching at the surface of who you are as a person. …and i know that all i’ve just done is state the obvious. bear with me. for many people, when it comes to finding words to…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    Huffpost: “When The World Doesn’t Know You Exist: Coming Out As Non-Binary”

    October 30, 2016

    QAC 33 – (Not) “Transitioning” As Non-Binary in Japan

    December 30, 2014

    adventures in Japanese TV: “Gathering of 13 Trans Women”

    February 9, 2017
  • [A]sexuality,  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A: “…maybe that anon was talking about nonsexual love mixed with nonromantic sex.”

    August 1, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: I saw your answer about fraysexuality. I don’t know if I can be helpful but maybe that anon was talking about nonsexual love mixed with nonromantic sex. This is how I feel myself but I could not find a word mixing my sexuality and my romantic attraction. And I would love to find this word. The definition of fraysexual doesn’t describe how I feel. (re: this post) i very well could have misunderstood the anon in that ask. perhaps they, like you, feel like fraysexual isn’t the word they’re looking for. nonsexual love mixed with nonromantic sex… i’m afraid that i’m drawing a blank when it comes to thinking of a word that encompasses all of that. which isn’t to say that such a word doesn’t exist, i just don’t know of it or am unable to think of it at the moment. can anyone else help anon…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    “love languages”?? communication tool.

    May 1, 2019

    QAC 73 – 【Asexuality In JAPAN】An Interview ♠【アセクシャルって?】日本x英語圏  || #AAW2018

    October 26, 2018

    Tokyo Rainbow Pride 2016 selfies

    May 14, 2016
  • 『[4コマ]☆Xジェンダー☆』
    [Random] Thoughts,  Gender[queer],  Japan[ese],  Queer[ness]

    『[4コマ]☆Xジェンダー☆』

    July 31, 2016 / No Comments

    …sigh. you know, i really want to be happy about these LGBTQIA 4-koma comics that Chii is doing to try and help raise awareness for lesser known genders and sexualities, but gah. i just can’t. because i suck. the linked comic that went up a couple days ago about Xジェンダー / non-binary is the last one i’m going to whinge over, i swear. for now. but first, an English translation of the comic to give context to my whinging. What’s “X-gender”? Xジェンダー (X-gender) people who, without deciding between “male” or “female”, take the stance or identity of being neither gender. referred to as “MtX” if designated “male” at birth and “FtX” if designated “female” at birth, however also referred to simply as “X” when not wanting to refer to one’s designated gender at birth. there are many definitions, but it goes something like this. red and white*: i want to be between male and female.…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    tfw TERFs.

    March 1, 2017
    "Building" by LEANDRO ERLICH (2017) taken at Mori Art Museum 2018

    h/History.

    February 11, 2019

    story time: when “African” is more important than “American”

    August 14, 2016
  • [A]sexuality,  Japan[ese],  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A: “I have a question regarding the Japanese use of the terms asexual and nonsexual…”

    July 27, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous post: I have a question regarding the Japanese use of the terms asexual and nonsexual. Is asexual generally used by all aces on the aromantic spectrum or do arospec aces who sometimes feel romantic attraction (such as grey aromantics) typically prefer to use nonsexual? I’d like to get more involved with the ace community when I (hopefully) move to Japan, but I feel like the Japanese terminology doesn’t even let me describe myself… (re: this post) bearing in mind that everything i’m about to say is based entirely on my own limited experience and observation… i can count the number of times i’ve met or heard of a Japanese person actively identifying in some way as gray or demi on one hand. generally speaking, awareness of nuanced ace & aro spectrum identities / orientations is hardly a thing among Japanese aces. the only time i hear any explicit mention of…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    Antiblackness and Binarism: Grindr in Japan

    January 6, 2018

    Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”

    February 23, 2016

    ?Tokyo Rainbow Pride 2017: Parade & Ace Meetup

    April 29, 2017
  • Q&A

    Q&A: “Would you mind explaining how you feel in regards to your bi identity?”

    June 28, 2016 / 1 Comment

    anonymous said: I have a question. I saw your post about how you find it a but annoying that people either assume you’re bisexual or bi romantic, when you always just say bi. And I’ll admit that since you are also asexual my first reaction was to assume you were biromantic, I’m sorry. But it confuses me a little. Would you mind explaining how you feel in regards to your bi identity? It’s okay if you don’t want to! I’m just trying to understand (in response to this post) first off, even though i felt a need to vent about it because it is annoying, i want to point out that i’m not offended or angry when someone misreads my bi identity, especially if they’re understanding when/if i correct them. there are so many reasons why a person would automatically read “bi” as either bisexual or biromantic that it almost…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    “the ace community goes overboard with words?” i.e. word vomitted “nah”

    April 5, 2018

    Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”

    February 23, 2016
  • [A]sexuality,  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A: “why are pan and bi both terms if they can mean the same thing?”

    June 14, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: okay. so. why are pan and bi both terms if they can mean the same thing? (i have googled this, trust me) …gonna take a stab in the dark and guess that this is in response to this post where no one ever said that they mean the same thing. well fear not, confused anon! unlike Google, i have an entire tag (or four) dedicated to your very question! may i direct you, dear anon, to my #bi vs pan tag in particular, as well as to these two posts in that tag: “what’s the difference between bi and pan?” (hint: there is a difference) “why does it matter if the definitions of bisexuality overlap with the definitions of…?” (hint: it doesn’t matter) and no, lovely anon, my sarcasm is not meant as condescension! i just found the tone of your ask mildly annoying, so i thought i might as well jump onto…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    Ace & Non-binary Pride @Tokyo Rainbow Pride 2015 (04/26/15)

    May 10, 2015

    QAC 03 – Romantic Orientations & Other Types of Attraction

    May 24, 2013

    “the ace community goes overboard with words?” i.e. word vomitted “nah”

    April 5, 2018
  • 『[4コマ]☆ノンセクシュアル☆』
    [A]sexuality,  [Random] Thoughts,  Japan[ese],  Queer[ness]

    『[4コマ]☆ノンセクシュアル☆』

    May 25, 2016 / 1 Comment

    …so this has been going around on Japanese Twitter. about to pass out, but wanted to put a link to this here with a little blurb reasonably-contained-imho rant for my own future reference because this is personally relevant to me.

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    QAC 24 – Labels: Why They’re Important + Why I Use Them

    March 17, 2014

     “Things Asexual People Want You To Know” – BuzzFeed LGBT

    October 29, 2017

    AskAPan Week 07 – Family responses to the LGBTQ community

    July 5, 2013
  • [A]sexuality,  Gender[queer],  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A: “I’m genderfluid and for example when I’m female or even partly I feel attraction to women (only) and the same goes to when I’m male/masc…”

    May 16, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: Ok the thing is that I’m genderfluid and for example when I’m female or even partly I feel attraction to women (only) and the same goes to when I’m male/masc. Just wanted to ask if there’s a term/label/word or something to that. So if that’s a real thing? not everyone’s sexuality is fluid even if their gender is. yes, that is a real thing, regardless of whether there’s a term for it or not. some people use the terms gynosexual / gynoromantic to describe attraction to women, without regard to one’s own gender identity, but… i hesitant to even mention these terms, or their male counterparts androsexual / androromantic, at all because of people defining and using these terms in really problematic ways. as tempting as it may be to use these terms because they’re almost like an ‘easy fix’, i do not recommend them. i’m really only mentioning…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    QAC 51 – #ProudToBe Black Non-Binary Bi Pan AND Asexual

    June 22, 2016

    Antiblackness and Binarism: Grindr in Japan

    January 6, 2018

    QAC 55 – Older Asexuals: Coming Out Later In Life | Questioning | Trauma

    October 23, 2016
  • Gender[queer],  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A: “have you seen that discussion about a word for the prejudice against enbies…?”

    May 6, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: have you seen that discussion about a word for the prejudice against enbies on vergess’ blog? what do you think? no, i hadn’t seen the discussion prior to this ask. i assume that you’re referring to this discussion which seems to have been triggered by this post? i’m going to reblog the latter post later because what everyone’s saying there is really, really important, but for now i’m in a hurry, so… the condensed version of my thoughts: i think it’s great that @vergess and others are trying to coin a word to describe the unique challenges, prejudice, etc that non-binary people face, which i whole heartedly agree is different from what binary trans people face. personally, i’ve always used ‘non-binary erasure’ and ‘(gender) binarism’ to discuss such things, so i haven’t felt a strong need to coin a word for it. that said, it is true that in years…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    Ie Uru Onna Gyakushuu S2E3: “A home that is accepting of all [kinds of] love?!”

    January 24, 2019

    National Geographic: “Gender Revolution” (Japanese Edition)

    January 11, 2017

    QAC 53 – The Trans/Cis Binary | Non-Binary vs Trans Identity | Let’s Talk

    August 19, 2016
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VESPER H.

YouTuber & Blogger

Queer As Cat is the blog and YouTube channel of Vesper, an American expat currently living in Japan.
reoccurring topics include: #asexuality, #nonbinary, #queerness #blackness & #mentalhealth

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Recent Posts

  • literal “social distancing” from the ace community April 1, 2020
  • legalized weed in America: one of many chips on my Black shoulder March 7, 2020
  • willpower, sweat, and tears January 30, 2020
  • 🎬 QAC 79 – The Neverending Queer-y: My Queer Ace Journey || LGBT YouTube & COPPA January 4, 2020
  • #YouTubeIsOverParty: COPPA & The Hypocrisy of YouTube December 15, 2019

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