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Queer As Cat

gender・ sexuality・ race ・intersectionality

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  • Home
  • About
    • About QAC
    • About Vesper
  • Photos
    • Instagram
    • Tokyo Rainbow Pride
      • 2014
      • 2015
      • 2016
      • 2017
      • 2018
  • Resources
    • Asexual POC Resources
    • #LGBTQIA in Japan
  • Contact

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  • [A]sexuality,  Feedback,  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Feedback: “From Anon coming out to friend who might know…”

    November 10, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: From Anon coming out to friend who might know: So I came out to her and it went really well. She made it causal for me, lol. She didn’t say if she knew or not. I feel so much better now. Now to work on coming out as nonbinary lol. Thank u, Vesper. 🙂 ( re: anon from these posts, perhaps?) thank you for coming back (again) and sharing the good news, anon. so glad to hear that things went well for you. 🙂 her response to you coming out this time is really encouraging, i think. hopefully she will respond in an equally awesome way if / when you come out to her again. either way, best wishes!

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    #asexual pride shirt

    October 27, 2013

    QAC 06 – Coming Out as a Panromantic Asexual

    June 1, 2013

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    May 14, 2016
  • [A]sexuality,  Q&A

    Q&A: “There’s a guide that answers a lot of questions about [asexuality]… Do know where I can find it?”

    November 8, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: So I’m but to a friend but I don’t think I explained asexuality really well. There’s a guide that answers a lot of questions about it, but I’m having trouble finding it. It’s like an ace 101 thing. Do know where I can find it? i’m afraid that i don’t know which guide you’re referring to, but maybe these links could also be of some help to you? ”Q & Ace: An Introduction to Asexuality” – AsexualityArchive “Asexuality 101″ – Asexual Awareness Week Downloadable Resources – Asexual Awareness Week “Asexuality 101″ – A Trivial Knot “What Is Asexuality?” – WhatIsAsexuality.com if anyone has anything to add to this, please feel free to.

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    February 21, 2015

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    July 27, 2016

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    May 24, 2013
  • Q&A

    Q&A: “what do you think about asexuality and the LGBTQ community today?”

    November 7, 2016 / No Comments

    aro-probably-ace-ravenclaw said: Hi, Vesper! As my url says, I’m somewhere in the ace spectrum. I saw your video about asexuality and the LGBTQ community, and I need to ask: what do you think about it today? Something change?   hi! thanks for watching the video and for asking. while i would change some things about that video if i were to redo it today, the gist of what i said in those 16 minutes of blabbering remains true today and can be summarized by what i said @3:58: my personal stance on [asexuals being part of the LGBTQ community] is that anyone who feels that they are queer, anyone who identifies with the word ‘queer’, anyone who identifies as being part of the LGBTQ community has every right to identify as such. and those who do not feel like they identify with such a community or that they want themselves associated…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”

    February 23, 2016

    “the ace community goes overboard with words?” i.e. word vomitted “nah”

    April 5, 2018
  • Feedback

    Feedback: “just found ur videos, thank u so much for speaking up on this stuff…”

    November 7, 2016 /

    anonymous said: hey man, just found ur videos, thank u so much for speaking up on this stuff, so nice to see a nb agender person speaking on these issues. I’m just starting to figure out my identity, and honestly u have been such a blessing. ur lil white pet is p cute too, lil prickly hamster. honestly haven’t seen many voices that aren’t above like 25, and just knowing that u r nb, ace, and panrom is so relieving. so scared that this was just a phase. thanks again man, ur the best thanks, anon, for watching and for going out of your way to send me this nice message. i’m not agender myself (i’m maverique), but being agender and / or non-binary, asexual and pan certainly isn’t something that one ‘grows out of’, even if something does happen to change for you or for me later in life. i’m…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”

    February 23, 2016
  • [A]sexuality,  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A: “I feel like im going to cry I told my mom im ace…”

    October 27, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: I feel like im going to cry I told my mom im ace by saying it casually sorta in a convo, she said no im not and said when I go back to the doc (my anxiety/psychologist doc) she would bring it up and “fix me” im frustrated and Sad sorry for venting? a million and one internet hugs, anon, if that’s something you’re okay with. i’m really sorry your mom responded in such a horrible way. she obviously doesn’t even understand what it is that you told her or how much trust you’d put in her in deciding to even tell her at all… i hope that your doctor is more educated on the subject of (a)sexuality than your mom is and realizes that a person’s sexuality is not something that can be or even need be “fixed.” either way, i sincerely hope that your mom starts putting…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    November 25, 2017

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    October 27, 2013

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    June 23, 2016
  • [A]sexuality,  Q&A

    Q&A not Q&A: “I’m just here to vent. I’m a closeted ace and just now…”

    October 26, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous said: I’m just here to vent. I’m a closeted ace and just now in a small class w people I like made fun of asexuality and it wasn’t especially rude or mean but it still shocked me somehow… I’m still shaking. Maybe cause it’s sich a deep secret of mine oh anon, i’m sorry you were subjected to that. i think many people who read this will be able to relate to how you feel because we’ve be in similar situations and needless to say, it can really hurt. wishing you a wonderful rest of the day to help drown out that horrible part of your day. perhaps taken in some of the awesome ace positivity going around Tumblr at the moment in celebration of Asexual Awareness Week if that’ll help take your mind off it at all. <3

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    …annnd that’s a wrap!

    May 7, 2017
  • Q&A

    Q&A: “do you happen to know of a gender label/type that could be described loosely as…”

    October 22, 2016 / No Comments

    lymeandcoconut said: Hi there. I just started following you so I apologize if you’ve already addressed this, but do you happen to know of a gender label/type that could be described loosely as “I feel like at my core I’m agender, but I wear a female/male ‘suit'”? It’s hard to put into words, but I feel as if female is an outfit I wear, a role I play, but who I am underneath is agender. Have you heard of something like that?   i’m afraid that i haven’t come across a gender that fits the description of what you’re looking for. i have seen people talk about “performing” a gender that differs from their actual gender (for example, an agender person who considers themself to “perform” the socially defined role of “female” in their day-to-day life), but i generally see that “performance” treated as separate from a person’s actual gender rather than…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    “the ace community goes overboard with words?” i.e. word vomitted “nah”

    April 5, 2018

    Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”

    February 23, 2016
  • Feedback,  Q&A

    Q&A: “I was wondering if you’re ok with people calling you “doll”, “darling” or “sweetheart”?”

    October 21, 2016 /

    anonymous said: Hii, I really love your videos(: I’m so glad I found your channel, it really helped me come to terms with my romantic orientation(aromantic) & I was wondering if you’re ok with people calling you “doll”, “darling” or “sweetheart”? Some people think it’s gender specific, like for females. I personally don’t think so, but I wanna know what you think(: hi, anon. thanks for watching my videos and for the kind message. i really appreciate it. 🙂 generally speaking, i think that there’s a lot that goes into how any person feels about being referred to by any given “pet name” (term of endearment). as you’ve noted, a term can feel gender neutral to you while at the same time feeling gendered to someone else. neither person is necessarily right or wrong, of course. as i said, a lot– everything from culture to dialect, past experiences to historical…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”

    February 23, 2016
  • [A]sexuality,  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A: “Is it possible for someone to be aromantic and bi/pansexual?”

    October 21, 2016 / No Comments

    anonymous asked: Is it possible for someone to be aromantic and bi/pansexual? I’m not trying to be rude or anything. I’m genuinely curious because you’re one of the few people I’ve come across whose biro/panro and ace, so I’m just wondering if one could be the former. I hope I didn’t word this incorrectly. If this ask comes off as harmful in any way, then I’m sorry. it’s more than possible, anon. i think you’ll find that there are plenty of aromantic bisexuals and aromantic pansexuals out there who would be more than happy to speak to the fact that their existence is more than just a possibility, it’s fact. 🙂 in other words, someone can most certainly be aromantic and bisexual / pansexual, anon, and no worries! your ask is worded just fine.

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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  • Q&A

    Q&A: “I’ve heard it called “queer straightness”…”

    October 19, 2016 / No Comments

    dear anon from this post, upon hitting “post” after typing up a response to your most recent asks, Tumblr decided to be a Piece Of Shit and not actually post the ask at all. i have no idea where that ask even went, but thanks to a browser extension i still have my response to the asks word-for-word, so here it is without the first part of the ask and thus missing a lot of context for everyone else, but oh well… (2) I’ve heard it called “queer straightness”. Imo that’s not a reason to banish anyone from anywhere , but then again, I don’t know how things work over there. Thanks again for answering, now I understand this whole situation better. ( re: this post ) thanks for coming back and responding to my response, anon, and i apologize from totally running away with your ask. my response was…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    “the ace community goes overboard with words?” i.e. word vomitted “nah”

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    Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”

    February 23, 2016
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VESPER H.

YouTuber & Blogger

Queer As Cat is the blog and YouTube channel of Vesper, an American expat currently living in Japan.
reoccurring topics include: #asexuality, #nonbinary, #queerness #blackness & #mentalhealth

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Recent Posts

  • literal “social distancing” from the ace community April 1, 2020
  • legalized weed in America: one of many chips on my Black shoulder March 7, 2020
  • willpower, sweat, and tears January 30, 2020
  • 🎬 QAC 79 – The Neverending Queer-y: My Queer Ace Journey || LGBT YouTube & COPPA January 4, 2020
  • #YouTubeIsOverParty: COPPA & The Hypocrisy of YouTube December 15, 2019

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