[A]sexuality,  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

Q&A: “Im 17 and Idk who im romantically attracted to…”

Kat said:

Im 17 and Idk who im romantically attracted to I see girls & guys as cute & I haven’t dated before & don’t care but in the future I would like a partner regardless of gender but wat am i? Ik im ace but like idk if I’m aro or something pls help:) -Kat

hi Kat,

i’m afraid i can’t actually tell you something about yourself that even you yourself do not know, but i will say this. it sounds like something that you do know about yourself is that you’re ace and that you’d like a partner regardless of gender in the future. that’s actually a lot to know about yourself! 🙂 while it’s obvious that you’d like to know more than that, i hope that at least knowing that much about yourself can be of some comfort or encouragement to you. it’s natural to be curious or even anxious to know more about the “how” and the “who” etc of how your experience with attraction (or lack there of), but it’s also natural that the answer to those questions come to you in time.

in the meantime, just go with whatever word(s) feel(s) comfortable to describe yourself at the time. if you think that you may be aro, then perhaps try identifying as aro and see how it feels. if it feels “right” (or rather, doesn’t feel “wrong”) then that might mean that it’s a step in the right direction for you.

all the best.

YouTuber and Blogger, Vesper is an American expat currently living in Japan.

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