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Queer As Cat

gender・ sexuality・ race ・intersectionality

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  • Home
  • About
    • About QAC
    • About Vesper
  • Photos
    • Instagram
    • Tokyo Rainbow Pride
      • 2014
      • 2015
      • 2016
      • 2017
      • 2018
  • Resources
    • Asexual POC Resources
    • #LGBTQIA in Japan
  • Contact

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  • Gender[queer],  Queer[ness],  YouTube[r]

    QAC 63 – Story Time: Coming Out To A Coworker || Visibly Queer | Non-Binary || The T Files #003

    December 19, 2017 / No Comments

    ever tried to come out to someone only to be met with “i already knew that”? before last week, i couldn’t say that i have, but when a coworker thinks their “gaydar” is on-point, but that gaydar ever-so-predictably fails to extend beyond just “GAY”, mental eye rolling, story time and a mini word vomit ensue. what does it mean to be “visibly queer” and why is it that more often than not ‘queer’ is often taken to be synonymous with “gay”? and is there any such thing as “visibly trans” or “visibly non-binary”? don’t expect to find any answers here, as it took me considerable effort just to limit my apathetic word vomit to 5 minutes zzz… two days post-recording and much sleep deprivation later…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    Tokyo Rainbow Pride 2016 (5/8/2016)

    May 14, 2016

    QAC 37 – Forced Out of the Closet: 1.5 Years Later (Non-Binary Asexual)

    June 16, 2015

    QAC 21 – Gender Identity & Feminism

    January 3, 2014
  • [Random] Thoughts,  Black[ness],  Gender[queer],  Mental [Un]health,  Queer[ness]

    gender feels; racial trauma.

    December 6, 2017 / No Comments

    as usual, i find myself turning to YouTube as a resource for information only to be reminded that…. YouTube is So Damn White. most things non-binary and / or trans are So Damn White. a search for “non-binary” and “testosterone” turns up almost nothing but skinny, short haired, white, non-binary people, none of whom i can really see myself in. which is nothing new. that’s part of the reason i’m on YouTube in the first place.

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    …so. selfies.

    February 15, 2015

    identity politics leave little room for agency; a thought.

    July 21, 2017

    QAC 30 – Gender Expression / Presentation Blurb

    October 28, 2014
  • Gender[queer],  Japan[ese],  Queer[ness],  YouTube[r]

    QAC 61 – Non-Binary Gender Identity Disorder (GID) & HRT in Japan | The T Files #001

    December 4, 2017 / No Comments

    after years of whining and moaning about it, i’m finally doing it; i’ll be starting HRT soon– and in Japan, no less. 2014 Vesper, who made an entire video about NOT “transitioning” in Japan, is eating their words. what’s made me change my mind now? how does one start HRT in Japan? as a non-binary person?? Gender Identity Disorder??? in this video, i talk about all the above, as well as recap the “highlights” of my recent appointment with a psychologist to get diagnosed with GID; a necessary first step to [legally] starting HRT from scratch in Japan. [ cw: vague sex mention @ 11:27 ~ 11:55; reproductive body stuff ] …took me long enough to get this video up, geez.

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    Snapchat rant #163

    July 2, 2016

    “boy? girl? NO! neither.”

    April 1, 2015

    sigh.

    July 23, 2017
  • [Random] Thoughts,  Black[ness],  Gender[queer],  Queer[ness]

    thank you

    November 28, 2017 / No Comments

    thank you @gc2b-apparel for the awesome sale! and thank you to BetterHelp.com, who sponsored this video about online therapy. most of all, a huge THANK YOU to everyone who watched it and to those who went a step further and even gave BetterHelp a try, you are The Awesomest Awesome to ever Awesome. i want you all to know that it’s entirely thanks to you that i can even afford these new binders at all. after nearly 4 years of wearing the same binders, which don’t even really bind at all anymore– which in turn has caused me many “ffffff– gotta layer! ffffff– layering does nothing– FFFFF” days– it’s more than about time that i get new ones. upcoming binder review once they make it to Japan and i’ve had time to try them out? probably. perhaps what i’m looking forward to the most is seeing how Nude No. 2 looks against my skin…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    the ‘Sin City’ asexual

    January 10, 2019

    QAC 47 –  Re: “Transitioning” in Japan / Body Mods & Dysphoria || Tea & Word Vomit

    February 28, 2016

    my #WakandaForever✊? is not your #WakandaForever✊

    April 21, 2018
  • Gender[queer],  Japan[ese],  Queer[ness]

    re: one step forward, zero steps back?

    November 27, 2017 / No Comments

    queerascat: so, after going to an appointment with my psychiatrist and blabbering about how much being around my family fucks me up whenever i go “home” for the holidays, which i’d be doing in less than a month’s time, causing him to be like “but what if you relapse??? consider upping your meds before you go???” and me being like “at least i’m on meds at all this time around so lolololol nah”– i felt the need to just…. really DO something yesterday. so i did the something. and the something will happen 4realz for realz tomorrow. so yeah, Anxiety word vomit blogging at 9:35pm at Starbucks. over the past three weeks or so i’ve been emailing a clinic that had been recommended to me by a friend re: starting HRT. after three weeks of no response to said emails, i decided to sneak out of work yesterday (because the clinic is seemingly…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    QAC 75 – Questioning In Silence?: Identity | Self-Discovery | Stigma || Random Thoughts

    February 27, 2019

    QAC 09 – The Binding Dilemma

    June 24, 2013

    QAC 07 – Transmasculine & Transfeminine (my opinion)

    June 4, 2013
  • Gender[queer],  Japan[ese],  Mental [Un]health,  Queer[ness]

    one step forward, zero steps back?

    November 26, 2017 / No Comments

    so, after going to an appointment with my psychiatrist and blabbering about how much being around my family fucks me up whenever i go “home” for the holidays, which i’d be doing in less than a month’s time, causing him to be like “but what if you relapse??? consider upping your meds before you go???” and me being like “at least i’m on meds at all this time around so lolololol nah”– i felt the need to just…. really DO something yesterday. so i did the something. and the something will happen 4realz for realz tomorrow. so yeah, Anxiety word vomit blogging at 9:35pm at Starbucks. over the past three weeks or so i’ve been emailing a clinic that had been recommended to me by a friend re: starting HRT. after three weeks of no response to said emails, i decided to sneak out of work yesterday (because the clinic is seemingly only…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    Tokyo Rainbow Pride 2016 selfies

    May 14, 2016

    ? QAC 78 – 1yr+ on T: Japan vs America | Planned Parenthood | Intermusc vs SubQ Injections || The T Files #011

    September 8, 2019

    Snapchat rant #163

    July 2, 2016
  • Feedback,  Gender[queer],  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Feedback: “I’m sure there are plenty of other trans people who want to be visibly trans…”

    September 22, 2017 / No Comments

    anonymous said: On the visibility thing- I am a trans person who wants to be proudly and visibly trans, mostly because I’m genderqueer and there isn’t really a way to “pass” as gq, so being seen as cis is automatically misgendering me. So I try to be as “nonpassing” and obviously trans/queer as possible. And I’m sure there are plenty of other trans people who want to be visibly trans, otherwise stuff like trans pride shirts and such wouldn’t exist, no? Or am I misunderstanding what you mean by visibility? ( re: this post ) i agree with you, anon, that there are a lot of people who want to visibly subvert and / or defy the assumption that they are cis a man / woman or otherwise a binary gender that they are not– especially among those for whom (as you pointed out) “passing” as their gender (or lack thereof) is…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”

    February 23, 2016
  • [A]sexuality,  Black[ness],  Feedback,  Gender[queer],  Queer[ness]

    Re: Re: “”Visibility””

    September 19, 2017 / 1 Comment

    oodlenoodleroodle: queerascat: for the longest time it struck me as odd, the way that the LGBT community at large upholds “visibility” as some kind of goal or ideal to be fought for. it wasn’t until recent years that i actually stopped and thought about it enough to realize why reference to and usage of “visibility” in this way bothers me so much. as someone who has always been and will always be hypervisible because of their race, it baffles me when people advocate for visibility as if visibility is what we all want; as if visibility is even a means to getting what we all want. this upholding of visibility as something important for all of us to fight for seems grossly negligent of the fact that some of us are already more visible than others and that that very visibility is part of what has gotten some of us bullied,…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    QAC 01 – Introduction

    May 11, 2013

    「やがて君になる」/ “Yagate Kimi ni Naru”: an aro/ace coded, sapphic ‘love story’…?

    October 8, 2018

    humbled

    July 31, 2018
  • Gender[queer],  Mental [Un]health,  Queer[ness]

    conversation with Mr. Psychiatrist: その②

    September 3, 2017 / 1 Comment

    ※ cw: dysphoria, genitalia mention ….so, in typical me fashion, i ended up coming out as non-binary to my psychiatrist the other day. i’d had no intention of coming out to him, but at the same time i had no intention of making any effort to not come out to him, so. *shrugs* i’d already come out to him as queer / bi / ace during my first appointment, so i already had some means of gauging what his reaction might be like. also, this is the same guy who is overly focused on “results” and “remission” to the point of being laughable / uncomfortable at times, so i already had reservations about the guy from the start.

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    AskAPan Week 07 – Family responses to the LGBTQ community

    July 5, 2013

    …mmm, so.

    March 24, 2017

    1978 Call Out Culture Is Fierce…! lmao

    November 26, 2018
  • Gender[queer],  Japan[ese],  Q&A,  Queer[ness]

    Q&A: “what does Xジェンダー mean?”

    August 31, 2017 / No Comments

    anonymous said: Heya! Sorry to bother you, but what does Xジェンダー mean? Is it literally the Japanese translation of non-binary? Or has the same meaning? Thanks according to 「Xジェンダーって何?」, Xジェンダー (”x gender”) is: 性自認を表す言葉の一種で、出産時に割り当てられた男性もしくは女性の性別のいずれに二分された性の自覚を持たず、自己の性別に関し、男女どちらでもない、あるいは男女どちらでもある、さらにはそれすらもどちらでもないっといった認識を自己の性に対してもっている人々のことを指す日本独自の呼称です。 a word that refers to a gender identity; a term unique to Japan to refer to people who do not identify as either of the two genders, male and female, that are assigned at birth, but rather self-identifies as neither male nor female, both male and female or as a different gender entirely. while i don’t have any sources to link to at the moment, i’m fairly certain that Xジェンダー was coined in Japan completely independent of “non-binary” in the English language. in fact, i’m also fairly certain that it was coined before usage of “non-binary” in reference to gender in English, but again, no source links because i’m too tired to dig for them. either way, Xジェンダー is…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

    You May Also Like

    ARTICLE: “Why Transgender People In Japan Prefer To Be Told They Have A “Disorder””

    August 17, 2016

    #TRP2015 準備完了

    April 25, 2015

    QAC 48 – Non-Binary Gender Norms & (A)sexuality: Yeah, No.

    March 27, 2016
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VESPER H.

YouTuber & Blogger

Queer As Cat is the blog and YouTube channel of Vesper, an American expat currently living in Japan.
reoccurring topics include: #asexuality, #nonbinary, #queerness #blackness & #mentalhealth

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Recent Posts

  • literal “social distancing” from the ace community April 1, 2020
  • legalized weed in America: one of many chips on my Black shoulder March 7, 2020
  • willpower, sweat, and tears January 30, 2020
  • 🎬 QAC 79 – The Neverending Queer-y: My Queer Ace Journey || LGBT YouTube & COPPA January 4, 2020
  • #YouTubeIsOverParty: COPPA & The Hypocrisy of YouTube December 15, 2019

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