QPOC Archives | Page 3 of 7 | Queer As Cat

[A]sexuality, Black[ness], Gender[queer], Queer[ness], YouTube[r]

#DoTell Podcast: QueerAsCat (Interview)

May 24, 2017 / No Comments

nearly a year ago i sat down for an interview with the amazing Dandy of @dotellpodcast, a podcast that was created to make a safe space for queer people of color to tell their stories. each week a new episode featuring someone’s intensely personal story is released and this week’s episode is mine. while i certainly wouldn’t hesitate to recommend any one of the other episodes of the #DoTell Podcast, especially to fellow QPOC looking to hear the stories of other QPOC, i can’t help but feel obligated to forewarn you that my episode is fifty-some-odd minutes of me quite literally spilling my guts to the world… and i absolutely will not be offended if you find my guts to be uninteresting and would prefer to tippy-toe through it. as such, here are few jump points? 00:00 ~ introduction 03:34 ~ how i ended up in Japan 05:01 ~ dysfunctional…

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Vesper H.

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QAC 34 – Distancing Yourself From Family
February 16, 2015

Ie Uru Onna Gyakushuu S2E3: “A home that is accepting of all [kinds of] love?!”
January 24, 2019

QAC 02 – The Road to Asexuality
May 17, 2013
[A]sexuality, Gender[queer], Mental [Un]health, Queer[ness], YouTube[r]

…mmm, so.

March 24, 2017 / No Comments

i’m extremely busy and low on spoons right now, so i’ve been silently keeping a very weary eye on the ongoing situation regarding YouTube’s age-restricted censorship of LGBTQIA content. as youtuber after youtuber responded to the censorship of their videos and the outcry from youtubers and non-youtubers alike grew, i’ve remained silent because, as i said, i’m extremely busy and low on spoons– but also because i glanced at Creator Studio, the backend of YouTube for content creators, and saw no change in my video listing or anything else that indicated restriction. well, my exhausted, weary (and wary) ass turned on “Restricted Mode” tonight. 29 out of 65 of my videos and 4 entire playlists have been marked as potentially inappropriate for young viewers. and you know, if i weren’t barely functioning, struggling to even find the time to eat and sleep right now, i’d most certainly be livid and…

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Vesper H.

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Ie Uru Onna Gyakushuu S2E3: “A home that is accepting of all [kinds of] love?!”
January 24, 2019

“love languages”?? communication tool.
May 1, 2019

gender non-conformity sure does make for good entertainment for cis people, huh Japan?
April 25, 2016
[A]sexuality, Black[ness], Mental [Un]health, Q&A, Queer[ness]

Q&A: “i found an old post about a poc ace and went on their blog and they know say they don’t identify as ace…”

March 23, 2017 / No Comments

anonymous said: (suicide ideation, death threat and conversion tw) i found an old post about a poc ace and went on their blog and they know say they don’t identify as ace because aces are bad, basically. and like, i’m literally crying. idk what to do, that just really struck me. someone who wrote about being queer, ace and a poc like me shitting on me and telling me my identity is inherently problematic when it’s the reason i can’t access mental health atm, which is something i need cause the ‘discourse’ & the violent abuse i faced on this website for, including death threats, caused me to fall back into suicidal ideation. and the only therapist available to me suggested conversion therapy (i live in a small central american country, there’s not much knowledge about these things- she thinks if i can be converted to straight, i will no…

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Vesper H.

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Re: “”Visibility””
September 18, 2017

spotted: LGBT 101 on Japanese TV
February 21, 2015

botched allyship & language barriers #TRP2017
May 11, 2017
[Random] Thoughts, Black[ness], Mental [Un]health, Queer[ness]

that feel when

January 28, 2017 / No Comments

self-proclaimed allies look to you for guidance on how they can be a better ally while consciously or not expecting their hand to be held or their fragile feelings to be spared along the way; simultaneously oblivious every time they trample all over your feelings, perpetrating the very thing they claim to be against because they’re so focused on the elephant in the room that they pay no mind to their own everyday microaggressions.

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Vesper H.

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commentary: “Where Is The Asexual Representation in LGBTQ Pride?”
June 10, 2017

fuck your Oppression Olympics
September 15, 2016

QAC 30 – Gender Expression / Presentation Blurb
October 28, 2014
[Random] Thoughts, Art[sy Fartsy]

#2016BestNine: Last Minute Selfie Positivity

December 30, 2016 / No Comments

with only one day left in 2016, it’s time for the annual end-of-the-year stuff zzz… having had memory issues for forever, i’ve been journaling / archiving / etc stuff online since, well… 2002 when i created my livejournal account, i guess. New Year’s specific stuff started in 2007 with a questionnaire-type meme that i have done every year since to recap the outgoing year, followed years later by a year-end “photo dump” to summarize a year’s worth of photos in one place. this post is a more recent tradition courtesy of Instagram, but i don’t want to post this on IG, so here we are! again. while i feel like 2016 hasn’t been a overly bad year for me personally, i also feel like the past two months have been such that they overshadow whatever else i am able to recall of 2016… sigh. it’s nice to have photographic proof that…

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Vesper H.

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re: gaslighting in the aftermath of the 2016 US presidential election
November 19, 2016

endings & beginnings. ?
April 2, 2019

adventures in Japanese TV: “haafu”
September 1, 2016
[Random] Thoughts, Black[ness], Japan[ese], Mental [Un]health, Queer[ness]

on perpetual exhaustion

December 4, 2016 / 2 Comments

that feel when someone asks you how you are and you respond saying that you’re “tired”, knowing full well that they’ll take what you said differently from how you meant it. but that’s okay. because you’re fucking tired. you don’t have the energy to do anything about their understanding of the word anyway. hell, you yourself may not even know what kind of tired you are that day. are you depressed tired? are you anemic tired? are you queer tired? are you gaslighted tired? are you black tired? are you expat tired? are you anxious tired? are you one of the Many Other Kinds of tired? are you All Of The Above And More tired? ah yes, that’s right. you are a unique concoction of All The Above And More tired, further compounded upon by having to persevere through life as if you aren’t actually tired at all. when life…

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Vesper H.

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humbled
July 31, 2018

Documentary Explores The Reality Of Being Black And Gay In The Church
November 14, 2015

Antiblackness and Binarism: Grindr in Japan
January 6, 2018
[Random] Thoughts, Gender[queer], Japan[ese], Mental [Un]health, Queer[ness]

QAC 55.5 – Life Update: Post-Election Mental Health | Staying In Japan | Outted To Dad

November 23, 2016 / No Comments

two weeks ago any vague plans that i’d had for my immediate future were abruptly shattered when America elected Trump as the next president of the United States. two weeks later, i’m still struggling to cope with the news and the resulting blow to my already poor mental health. in this video, i give voice to my thoughts on being forced to navigate HRT in Japan and forgo (for the time being) other gender-related medical things that i’d hoped to pursue in America. i also talk about possibly moving to Tokyo in a year’s time, having been outted to my dad via Twitter and a new book by Ashley Mardell that i highly recommend. longass video is long, so here are some jump points for those of you only interested in specific things. @00:00 – post-election mental health @03:50 – shattered future; staying in Japan @08:55 – name change, HRT…

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Vesper H.

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#SpiritDay 2016
October 19, 2016

…and here we are. again. (cw: homophobia, nsfw)
July 17, 2018

….so i did a doodle.
March 19, 2013
When The World Doesn’t Know You Exist: Coming Out As Non-Binary

Gender[queer], Queer[ness]

Huffpost: “When The World Doesn’t Know You Exist: Coming Out As Non-Binary”

October 30, 2016 / No Comments

Life would be easier if it came with a guidebook. If it did, maybe it wouldn’t have taken me 27 years to realise that I didn’t actually have to subscribe to society’s assertion that everyone is either male or female. At the very least, ripping the book to shreds in a fit of rage would have made for great stress relief. Then again, had there been such a book I probably wouldn’t have grown up to be the person that I am today and I wouldn’t change that for the world. Hello, my name’s Vesper. I’m a 31 year old non-binary person who’s here today to tell you that gender is a much more beautifully complex thing than society would have you believe. That some people, such as myself, are neither male nor female but a different gender(s) entirely […] the blog post that i wrote for Ditch The Label…

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Vesper H.

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QAC 58 – Escaping Womanhood || Non-Binary | AFAB | Internalized Misogyny
August 16, 2017

gender feels; racial trauma.
December 6, 2017

QAC 40 – The Gender Tag! | Maverique
October 12, 2015
"Gender is a Much More Beautifully Complex Thing Than Society Would Have You Believe"- Ditch the Label

Gender[queer], Queer[ness]

“Gender is a Much More Beautifully Complex Thing Than Society Would Have You Believe”- Ditch the Label

October 18, 2016 / No Comments

Life would be easier if it came with a guidebook. If it did, maybe it wouldn’t have taken me 27 years to realize that I didn’t actually have to subscribe to society’s assertion that everyone is either male or female. At the very least, ripping the book to shreds in a fit of rage would have made for great stress relief. Then again, had there been such a book I probably wouldn’t have grown up to be the person that I am today and I wouldn’t change that for the world. Hello, my name’s Vesper. I’m a 31 year old non-binary person who’s here today to tell you that gender is a much more beautifully complex thing than society would have you believe. That some people, such as myself, are neither male nor female but a different gender(s) entirely. […] when @ditchthelabel, an international anti-bullying charity, approached me about writing…

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Vesper H.

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1978 Call Out Culture Is Fierce…! lmao
November 26, 2018

QAC 07 – Transmasculine & Transfeminine (my opinion)
June 4, 2013

spotted: LGBT 101 on Japanese TV
February 21, 2015
[A]sexuality, [Random] Thoughts, Black[ness], Gender[queer], Queer[ness]

fuck your Oppression Olympics

September 15, 2016 / No Comments

if you want to base your personal identity as part of the LGBTQIA community on the oppression that you face, be my guest. however, do not for a second think that you get to base my or anyone else’s identity as part of the LGBTQIA community on the oppression that any of us face. as if you even fucking know the oppression that i or anyone else face(s). as if everything that i am or anyone else is in relation to the LGBTQIA community could even be boiled down to the oppression that any of us face. seriously. fuck you. as a black person who is also non-binary, queer and ace it is so incredibly mindfucking to me how some people on [Tumblr] and in general insist on trying to boil the connection that i or anyone else has with the LGBTQIA community down to oppression. fucking oppression. and not just oppression, presumed oppression. how the…

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Vesper H.

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QAC 71 – Testosterone, Libido & Asexuality: Has HRT Changed My Sexuality? || The T Files #009
July 9, 2018

『[4ｺﾏ]☆ノンセクシュアル☆』
May 25, 2016

Tokyo Rainbow Pride 2016: Asexual & Trans / Non-binary Awesomeness!
May 14, 2016