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Q&A: “[my friend] told me that Ace/Aro ppl are not inherently part of the LGBT+ community unless if they identify as LGBT…”
anonymous said: Hi Vesper. I’m still learning about all the different genders and sexualities and spectrums and I was talking to my friend the other day who’s more knowledgable than I am, and she told me that Ace/Aro ppl are not inherently part of the LGBT+ community unless if they identify as LGBT. I’m a little confused by this. Are asexuality and aromanticism not a part of LGBT+? She basically implied that bc Ace/Aro ppl are not part of LGBT+ they do not face oppression. I’m sorry if this is confusing. hello, anon. what your friend told you is nothing but her opinion and it’s an opinion that many, myself included, disagree with. you may feel like your friend is more knowledgeable than you are about gender and sexuality, but she is by no means an expert on the oppression that others do or do not face and it’s rather…
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QAC 49 – Singular ‘They’ | Gender Neutral Pronouns | This Has Been A PSA
singular ‘they’: voted word of the year in 2015 by the American Dialect Society, used by English speakers everywhere– even by Shakespeare– and yet today some people insist on claiming that using ‘they’ in the singular is “ungrammatical,” “trendy” or “uneducated.” pull up a chair and have a seat, because if you’re one of those people, this video was made for you. but hold up, there’s no way i’d put so much time and effort into a video just for your pathetic ass. more than anything, this video is dedicated to everyone out there fighting to have their pronouns remembered, used and respected. as hard as it is, don’t give up or feel guilty for asking people to use your pronouns. your comfort is important. your identity is valid. your request to be referred to with specific pronouns is 100% justified and worth fighting for. stay strong. next time someone…
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Q&A: “do you think you could help me explain why sexuality is not the same as having a “racial preference”…?”
anonymous said: Hey, do you think you could help me explain why sexuality is not the same as having a “racial preference” for who you date? Like I know they’re different but I can’t seem to explain it very well. Thanks!! hi anon! sorry for taking so long to reply. in my humble opinion, “sexuality” is a very broad term that is used to describe a wide variety of things, including preferences that a person may have with regards to gender, number of partners, types of relationships, hair color/type/location, race, and a million other things. racial preference is a thing that could be considered relevant to a person’s sexuality. that doesn’t mean it isn’t or can’t be racist to have such a preference. that said, i get the feeling that you’re looking to explain the difference between sexual orientation and racial preference rather than sexuality in general. that is a…
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western bullshit travels & comes out of the mouth of babes. ugh.
…in one of my classes today we were discussing colors and food. we were in the middle of discussing food that’s yellow and someone’d said banana, so i wrote it on the board under yellow. all of the kids were talking at once shouting colors and foods, but then one kid talks louder to try to get my attention. kid: ne ne! i heard foreigners call Japanese people “yellow”! me: *quickly turns to kid wide-eyed* …what?? kid: yeah, like you know how there’s black people, they call Japanese people “yellow monkeys”. me: *staring at this kid totally wide-eyed and slack-jawed in utter disbelief* *in the seconds of silence while my mind’s thinking a million different things, a few other kids stop talking and stare at me having noted my odd reaction* me: *5 secs that feel like a minute later* that’s hella offensive, where did you hear– never mind, what’s…
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Q&A and Q&A: “I just saw a long and intricate post explaining why het ace/aro people shouldn’t be in the LGBT community…”
anonymous said: I just saw a long and intricate post explaining why het ace/aro people shouldn’t be in the LGBT community as the space just isn’t for them. In the end they explained that het ace/aro’s should be allies for LGBT and that’s just something they should accept. I don’t know… I’m feeling pretty deflated now and I’ve given up all hope on ace/aro people ever being accepted in this community. I also find it insulting that it came from an ace person. I feel sad and I don’t want to be asexual anymore. oh, anon. i’m really sorry that you came across a post like that. may i recommend blocking that person and any other people whom you see similar posts from as soon as you see the post, before even reading the post? please do whatever it takes to protect yourself from hurtful posts like that, even if…
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Q&A: “What are your thoughts on “passing” in the queer community?”
anonymous said: What are your thoughts on “passing” in the queer community? Mostly in terms of being mistaken for a heterosexual couple and if this actually gives people privileges that people in non-heterosexual seeming queer relationships don’t have. sorry for taking so long to reply, anon! it’s been one hellava week…. i’ve said this before in reference to other “het-blahblahblah privilege” arguments that people make, but i’ll say it again because it equally applies to this. having one’s identity erased by society due to heteronormativity is not a privilege. i will shout this from the rooftops until the end of time. society literally assumes that e v e r y o n e is straight until “proven otherwise”, i don’t care if that person is a lesbian, gay, asexual or anything else. and yet, for some odd reason *cough*biphobia*cough* i don’t see people making the argument that a lesbian, for example, accesses “straight…
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Q&A not Q&A: “I keep following people on Tumblr thinking they’re alright only to find out later that…”
anonymous said: I need to talk to you again. I keep following people on [Tumblr] thinking they’re alright only to find out later that they think het ace people don’t belong in the community and they think it’s funny when people try to explain to them why they’re wrong and it’s just so upsetting. As someone who once only identified as het ace and found comfort in the community to further understand my sexuality it’s just really sad to think that het ace’s aren’t even valid here to most people. I get so upset about it and it feels like an attack on all asexuals and even aromantics like AGAIN what theyre saying is we’re not valid members of the community unless we identify as something else as well since the A part isnt that important well we might as well hand it over to the allies since they get…