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Queer As Cat

gender・ sexuality・ race ・intersectionality

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  • Home
  • About
    • About QAC
    • About Vesper
  • Photos
    • Instagram
    • Tokyo Rainbow Pride
      • 2014
      • 2015
      • 2016
      • 2017
      • 2018
  • Resources
    • Asexual POC Resources
    • #LGBTQIA in Japan
  • Contact

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  • [A]sexuality,  [Random] Thoughts,  Mental [Un]health,  Queer[ness]

    literal “social distancing” from the ace community

    April 1, 2020 / 3 Comments

    at the time of writing this, the date is March 31st, 2020: just over 2 months since the first case of COVID-19 in America was confirmed...

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    IF {subcommunity building} THEN {…?}

    March 11, 2019

    QAC 41 – Am I Asexual? | Never Too Young To Know

    October 18, 2015

    Asexy Aces at Tokyo Rainbow Pride 2014 (04/27/2014)

    May 7, 2014
  • [A]sexuality,  Mental [Un]health,  Queer[ness]

    Burnt Out & Neurotic: The Toll of Blogging While Ace and Mentally Ill

    December 26, 2018 / 3 Comments

    Over the course of the past few years or so, I've had no choice but to come face-to-face with the fact that I'm not exactly the spitting image of mental health. That, in fact, I never have been, having struggled with persistent depression and social anxiety for years, whether I was conscious of that fact or not. As such, debilitating depression/anxiety isn't new to me. Simultaneous burnout and mental breakdown on account of blogging was, however.

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    🎬 QAC 79 – The Neverending Queer-y: My Queer Ace Journey || LGBT YouTube & COPPA

    January 4, 2020

    QAC 03 – Romantic Orientations & Other Types of Attraction

    May 24, 2013

    *scribble scribble*

    September 15, 2016
  • Gender[queer],  YouTube[r]

    QAC 65 – 1 Month on Low Dose HRT | Non-Binary | Mental Health || The T Files #005

    February 12, 2018 / No Comments

    voice cracking? increased stamina? mood swings?? it’s been one month since i started a relatively low dosage of testosterone and even though in actuality not much has happened yet, i’m still surprised by what has. it’s been an interesting month, but as it turns out starting low-dose T isn’t as simple as simply choosing a random low dosage and going with the recommended injection frequency. or at least, not when you’re trying to manage depression and anxiety on top of it all and you’re not sure  fluctuating hormone levels are a risk that you want to take. one month later, while still happy with my decision to start T, it’s time to take a moment to pause. recap. and reevaluate. …my video descriptions sound like the back of a poorly written novel abandoned on the shelf with the tabloids in the checkout aisle because someone decided last minute that it…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    Snapchat rant #163

    July 2, 2016

    QAC 75 – Questioning In Silence?: Identity | Self-Discovery | Stigma || Random Thoughts

    February 27, 2019

    …so this happened at TRP today.

    May 7, 2016
  • [Random] Thoughts,  Mental [Un]health

    anxiety: haha– fuck you.

    February 8, 2018 / No Comments

    me: could you maybe NOT make me think about that thing anymore maybe MAYBE? anxiety: did you know that that thing that you THINK you don’t want to think about but are thinking about anyway is a legit thing that you OUGHT to be thinking about– because WHAT IF?? i mean, just think about it! that thing? IT’S A THING. THAT YOU ARE STILL THINKING ABOUT. that thing. fuck.

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    2015 in selfies

    December 17, 2015

    01.12.2018: T Day à la Snapchat.

    January 12, 2018

    spotted: same-gender marriage feature on Japanese news

    October 12, 2015
  • [Random] Thoughts,  Mental [Un]health,  YouTube[r]

    impostor.

    January 20, 2018 / No Comments

    …it’s always disconcerting to be reminded of how people seem to have an impression of me as a person / my personality that doesn’t at all reflect who i am in reality.

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    re: gaslighting in the aftermath of the 2016 US presidential election

    November 19, 2016

    pen. ink. paper: journaling as self-care

    January 27, 2019

    #TRP2017

    May 11, 2017
  • Gender[queer],  Japan[ese],  Mental [Un]health,  Queer[ness]

    one step forward, zero steps back?

    November 26, 2017 / No Comments

    so, after going to an appointment with my psychiatrist and blabbering about how much being around my family fucks me up whenever i go “home” for the holidays, which i’d be doing in less than a month’s time, causing him to be like “but what if you relapse??? consider upping your meds before you go???” and me being like “at least i’m on meds at all this time around so lolololol nah”– i felt the need to just…. really DO something yesterday. so i did the something. and the something will happen 4realz for realz tomorrow. so yeah, Anxiety word vomit blogging at 9:35pm at Starbucks. over the past three weeks or so i’ve been emailing a clinic that had been recommended to me by a friend re: starting HRT. after three weeks of no response to said emails, i decided to sneak out of work yesterday (because the clinic is seemingly only…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    QAC 01 – Introduction

    May 11, 2013

    …one of many examples of why navigating セクマイ / LGBTQIA spaces in Japan can be painful at times.

    October 7, 2016

    🎬 QAC 79 – The Neverending Queer-y: My Queer Ace Journey || LGBT YouTube & COPPA

    January 4, 2020
  • Mental [Un]health,  YouTube[r]

    QAC 59 – Antidepressants 3 Months Later | BetterHelp: Online Therapy| World Mental Health Day

    October 10, 2017 / No Comments

    did you know that October 10th is World Mental Health Day? i’ve recently tried out BetterHelp.com, a great resource for online therapy. if you’re interested in trying online therapy or looking for a new therapist, check it out maybe? it’s been over 3 months since i started antidepressants. i made a video about my [mis]adventures with turning to professional help via medication for the first time back in July. it being World Mental Health Day and all, now’s the perfect time to finally update you all on the continuation of my [mis]adventures in mental health shit– now with an added dab of online therapy on top! in the interest of complete transparency, this video is a sponsored by BetterHelp and the above link is my personal referral link and anything generated from it will come back to me. that said, i would only ever accept sponsorship on a video if…

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    …mmm, so.

    March 24, 2017

    …so. selfies.

    February 15, 2015

    gender feels; racial trauma.

    December 6, 2017
  • [Random] Thoughts,  Japan[ese]

    missiles and tweets.

    August 28, 2017 / No Comments

    ….it’s 6:44am, i have to get ready for work, no time to recount things for Tumblr so just screencapping, but like. if the news of this ever makes it to the US enough for the US government who is responsible for Japan’s military defense to actually care, just know that i’m okay but just like what the fuck right now and i do not look forward to whatever shit response the Cheeto eventually puts out that just makes things even worse for people on my side of the world.

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    QAC 04 – Why I Identify as Panromantic & Biromantic

    May 24, 2013

    Documentary Explores The Reality Of Being Black And Gay In The Church

    November 14, 2015

    『[4コマ]☆AセクシュアルとAce(エース)☆』

    July 27, 2016
  • [Random] Thoughts,  Mental [Un]health

    conversation with Mr. Psychiatrist: その①

    July 23, 2017 / 1 Comment

    me: these meds sure have helped me regain control over my depression and anxiety. finally back to my depressed-anxious-and-angry-but-not-worryingly-so self! psychiatrist: that’s good– but what if– WHAT IF we up the dose a bit. at this rate, there’s a good chance you could go into remission! me: remission lolololol nah, i’m good, i think. pyschiatrist: but– BUT don’t you want to TRY? you could feel even better! me: even better lolololololol no antidepressant is going to make me better cuz no antidepressant is going to make this world less of a shitty place, but thanks anyway lololol

    continue reading
    Vesper H.

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    *scribble scribble*

    September 15, 2016

    lmfao

    June 2, 2016

    pen. ink. paper: journaling as self-care

    January 27, 2019
  • Mental [Un]health,  YouTube[r]

    QAC 57 – Depression and Anxiety, meet Antidepressants | Sertraline | Mental Health

    July 9, 2017 / 1 Comment

    for over 15 years i’ve struggled with Depression and Anxiety without therapy or medical intervention for numerous reasons, but having had Depression and Anxiety mop the floor with my ass for the past several months, i’ve finally bitten the bullet and sought out help in the form of antidepressants. in this video, i talk about my recent bout with depression and anxiety, my first psychiatric appointment and my first week on antidepressants. don’t want to watch the whole thing? don’t blame you, i’m longwinded as fuck. here are some jump points: ?00:31 – deteriorating mental health ?06:16 – first psychiatric appointment ?11:03 – antidepressants: the bad ?16:42 – antidepressants: the good …so this happened.

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    Vesper H.

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    re: gaslighting in the aftermath of the 2016 US presidential election

    November 19, 2016

    …the state of this blog, basically.

    May 28, 2017

    re: ….so. selfies.

    February 15, 2015
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VESPER H.

YouTuber & Blogger

Queer As Cat is the blog and YouTube channel of Vesper, an American expat currently living in Japan.
reoccurring topics include: #asexuality, #nonbinary, #queerness #blackness & #mentalhealth

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Recent Posts

  • literal “social distancing” from the ace community April 1, 2020
  • legalized weed in America: one of many chips on my Black shoulder March 7, 2020
  • willpower, sweat, and tears January 30, 2020
  • 🎬 QAC 79 – The Neverending Queer-y: My Queer Ace Journey || LGBT YouTube & COPPA January 4, 2020
  • #YouTubeIsOverParty: COPPA & The Hypocrisy of YouTube December 15, 2019

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