Queer As Cat | Page 62 of 74 | gender・ sexuality・ race ・intersectionality

QAC 66 – Split Attraction Model: Opting Out Of Romantic Orientations || Grayromantic | Asexual

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March 12, 2018

Re: “”Visibility””

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September 18, 2017

This Is Fine.

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July 14, 2018

QAC 74 – 1 Year on HRT: Non-Binary Dysphoria | Euphoria | “Passing” || The T Files #010

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January 3, 2019

fuck your Oppression Olympics

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September 15, 2016

Q&A

Q&A: “What is sexual attraction exactly?”

July 9, 2015 / No Comments

fajitasvanitas said: (Coming from an ace) what is sexual attraction exactly? Is it like “I want to have sex with this person?” Or?? coming from another ace who has never actually experienced sexual attraction first hand, that sounds about right. at least, in so far as i understand it. or as i put it in another post re: libido vs sexual attraction: for many people (including asexuals), it can be hard to distinguish between sexual attraction and sex drive/libido because they often do influence each other. if a sexual person feels sexually attracted to someone, that someone generally becomes the driving force behind one’s sex drive. however, it is totally possible to experience one without the other. in other words, sexual attraction is being attraction to/drawn to someone in such a way that that person becomes the target of one’s sexual feelings (libido).

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Vesper H.

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Q&A

Q&A: “Is it okay to question your sexuality or romantic attraction after being certain your whole life?”

July 9, 2015 / No Comments

anonymous said: Is it okay to question your sexuality or romantic attraction after being certain your whole life? I’ve reached a point where I’m not sure anymore and I’m very confused, both sexually and romantically. not only is it okay, it’s actually not uncommon. many people don’t begin actively questioning their sexual orientation, romantic orientation or even gender identity until later in life. you’re not alone, anon. also, while being confused about these things can be very stressful, it’s also okay and even natural to be confused. you’re going through a process of self-discovery. confusion is simply a part of that process. hang in there, anon! and all the best.

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Vesper H.

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[A]sexuality, Q&A, Queer[ness]

Q&A: “…do you think there could be other types of attraction?”

July 7, 2015 / No Comments

anonymous said: I know a lot of the time in discussions about asexual identities people break down attraction into 4 different categories: sexual, romantic, aesthetic, sensual (well and sometimes platonic). But do you think there could be other types of attraction? Sometimes I see people and I feel /something/ but I wouldn’t really categorize it as one of those – argh its so confusing! Am I just experiencing one of those types of attraction in a strange way?? without a doubt there could be (read: probably is) more to attraction than the categories that the ace and aro communities tend to refer to. attraction, as with feelings in general, is an insanely complex thing that most certainly cannot be neatly boxed into or described by categories. it doesn’t get said enough that not everyone even finds the existing categories helpful or meaningful in describing their attraction(s). you could be experiencing…

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Vesper H.

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May 14, 2016

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Q&A

Q&A: “if someone is a cis girl who is romantically attracted to girls and nonbinary people is she considered biromantic?”

July 6, 2015 / No Comments

anonymous said: if someone is a cis girl who is romantically attracted to girls and nonbinary people is she considered biromantic? or does biromantic just refer to being attracted to the binary genders? biromantic describes anyone of any gender who is romantically attracted to two or more genders, be those genders binary or not, so yes. biromantic would totally describe the person in question. it’s also worth mentioning that although biromantic is more commonly used, polyromantic– ie. romantic attraction to multiple (but not necessarily all) genders– could also describe the person in question. which term a person uses ultimately comes down to personal preference.

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Vesper H.

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Q&A

Q&A: “Okay so I have a question about sexuality preferences.”

June 29, 2015 / No Comments

sorryitsluz said: Okay so I have a question about sexuality preferences. I’ve always been attracted to males (I’m female btw) in both romantic way and a sexual way. I see myself with a male ya know? But lately I’ve realized that I also began to get an interest in females. Although it’s not the same as the interest I have in males. I don’t feel like I would have sex with a female but I do like them and feel like I would flirt/go over just a friendship. Could you help describe this please?? hi.. 🙂 i have a vague idea of what you’re trying to describe, but at the same time i don’t understand enough to be specific in helping you. rather than me trying to put words to something that i’m not personally experiencing, i think it would be better if i gave you resources to help…

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Vesper H.

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Q&A

Q&A: “Do you think that would be poly or bi? I don’t feel I’m straight because of the attraction to nonbinary individuals, but…”

June 25, 2015 / No Comments

anonymous said: I’m questioning currently. I’m female but attracted to males, demiboys, and some agender and genderfluid individuals. But mostly masculine presenting nb individuals. Do you think that would be poly or bi? I don’t feel I’m straight because of the attraction to nonbinary individuals. But I’m MOSTLY attracted to masculinity. hello, anon. i’ll be honest, this is kind of a tough ask for me to answer. it sounds like you’re looking to define your sexuality based on the appearance or gender expression of the people you are attracted to, whereas my understanding of attraction (in terms of orientations) is more based on a person’s gender identity rather than how a person presents themself. you said that you are mostly attracted to masculinity. people of literally ANY gender can present themselves in a masculine manner. does this mean that you could potentially be attracted to a masculine person of…

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Vesper H.

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Q&A

Q&A: “I have repeatedly told my dad that I am asexual and he still thinks that i’m not…”

June 25, 2015 / No Comments

anonymous said: I have repeatedly told my dad that I am asexual and he still thinks that i’m not. He says that I need to try being in a relationship before I can call myself asexual. I’m getting really tired of this and I just want him to understand. Do you have any information I can use to educate him on it? By the way I really want to thank you for making all of your videos about asexuality! Theyve really helped me! Thanks! 🙂 thank you! but it’s rather ironic that you’d ask me this while i myself am struggling with a parent who just doesn’t get it. that said, i’m sure there’s more hope for your dad than my #$faS@a mom. 😀 the thing is, understanding something like this is a two-way street. for your dad to truly understand who you are, he has to be willing…

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Vesper H.

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[Random] Thoughts, Gender[queer]

f’in birthday cards

June 23, 2015 / 1 Comment

*gets home to see a birthday card from mom in the mailbox* me: ….hm. *opens envelope to see a pink and gold card with butterflies and a big, fat “For You, Daughter” on the front* me: ……… *opens card to see a long, handwritten message* *reads long, seemingly heartfelt message half smiling until* card: ……..I may not have been all that you desired me to be, but I’ve tried my best. I love you! You will always be my daughter! Still My Child!!!” me: ………………………… *goes onto Google Hangouts* *types exasperatedly* me: you expect me to happily say thank you for a card in which you’ve repeatedly misgendered me AGAIN just because you wrote nice things?? i’m sorry but no. thank you for the birthday present, but i don’t need cards in which you ignore my gender. *hits send, closes Google Hangouts* *watches Orange is the New Black while eating dinner…

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Vesper H.

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Feedback

Feedback: “I discovered your youtube channel, and I don’t know why but…”

June 23, 2015 / No Comments

anonymous said: I discovered your youtube channel, and I don’t know why but you talking about your experiences of being an ace bi/panro nb indivdiual has really helped me with figuring myself out. i’m honored to have been of help to you, anon. thank you for watching. 🙂

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Vesper H.

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Q&A

Q&A: “what does it mean when people identify as bi/pan or poly/pan or any other combination like that?”

June 23, 2015 / No Comments

anonymous said: Im sorry if this is a dumb question, but what does it mean when people identify as bi/pan or poly/pan or any other combination like that. Is it like romantically they’re pan and sexually they’re bi, vice versa. Or is it something like they fall along somewhere between the two? I don’t know if I worded this clearly, I’m really curious and confused. Thank you for your time, you have a great blog btw. there is an infinite number of reasons why someone might identify as/with more than one orientation at the same time. for example, having a sexual orientation that differs from their romantic/etc orientation feeling like those orientations equally describe who they are feeling like a combination of those orientations feeling somewhere in between those orientations having a fluid sexuality that shifts between those orientations having a desire to be visible as a member of…

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Vesper H.

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