nonbinary erasure Archives | Queer As Cat

Feedback, Gender[queer], Q&A, Queer[ness]

Feedback: “I’m sure there are plenty of other trans people who want to be visibly trans…”

September 22, 2017 / No Comments

anonymous said: On the visibility thing- I am a trans person who wants to be proudly and visibly trans, mostly because I’m genderqueer and there isn’t really a way to “pass” as gq, so being seen as cis is automatically misgendering me. So I try to be as “nonpassing” and obviously trans/queer as possible. And I’m sure there are plenty of other trans people who want to be visibly trans, otherwise stuff like trans pride shirts and such wouldn’t exist, no? Or am I misunderstanding what you mean by visibility? ( re: this post ) i agree with you, anon, that there are a lot of people who want to visibly subvert and / or defy the assumption that they are cis a man / woman or otherwise a binary gender that they are not– especially among those for whom (as you pointed out) “passing” as their gender (or lack thereof) is…

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Vesper H.

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Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”
February 23, 2016
Gender[queer], Mental [Un]health, Queer[ness], YouTube[r]

QAC 58 – Escaping Womanhood || Non-Binary | AFAB | Internalized Misogyny

August 16, 2017 / No Comments

as a non-binary person who was deemed to be female at birth, i have struggled all my life with what others consider to be my “womanhood”. when women have fought so hard to progress gender equality to where it is today, asserting that there is no wrong way to be a woman because women can do and be anything– juxtaposed against the continual struggle of trans women and some non-binary people just to have their womanhood recognized and respected– it is incredibly hard not to see my own rejection of womanhood as anything other than internalized misogyny. it certainly doesn’t help that society in general, but women especially, are often more than happy to write off my gender as being nothing more than internalized misogyny. i mean, given how awesome women are but how misogynistic society is, obviously any disconnect i feel with womanhood must be a result of internalized…

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Vesper H.

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Ie Uru Onna Gyakushuu S2E3: “A home that is accepting of all [kinds of] love?!”
January 24, 2019

Re: “”Visibility””
September 18, 2017

Happy Non-binary Day!
July 14, 2016
[A]sexuality, Black[ness], Mental [Un]health, Q&A, Queer[ness]

Q&A: “i found an old post about a poc ace and went on their blog and they know say they don’t identify as ace…”

March 23, 2017 / No Comments

anonymous said: (suicide ideation, death threat and conversion tw) i found an old post about a poc ace and went on their blog and they know say they don’t identify as ace because aces are bad, basically. and like, i’m literally crying. idk what to do, that just really struck me. someone who wrote about being queer, ace and a poc like me shitting on me and telling me my identity is inherently problematic when it’s the reason i can’t access mental health atm, which is something i need cause the ‘discourse’ & the violent abuse i faced on this website for, including death threats, caused me to fall back into suicidal ideation. and the only therapist available to me suggested conversion therapy (i live in a small central american country, there’s not much knowledge about these things- she thinks if i can be converted to straight, i will no…

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Vesper H.

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Tokyo Rainbow Pride 2016 (5/8/2016)
May 14, 2016

?Tokyo Rainbow Pride 2017: Parade & Ace Meetup
April 29, 2017

QAC 54 – Confusing Gender Envy & Admiration with Attraction || Non-Binary | Asexual
October 10, 2016
[A]sexuality, [Random] Thoughts, Gender[queer], Japan[ese], Queer[ness]

tfw TERFs.

March 1, 2017 / No Comments

…mmm, that feel when you’re getting an influx of notes because a certain post of yours is being circulated among TERF lesbians praising Japan for its trans misogyny. edit: oh joy, of course someone had to go there. trigger warning for all of the links in this post, but rape warning for that last one.

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Vesper H.

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allo by default: hypocrisy in “aspec” spaces
February 25, 2017

romantic orientation pride
May 29, 2013

Tokyo Rainbow Pride 2016 (5/8/2016)
May 14, 2016
Japan[ese], Q&A

Q&A: “I read your post about transphobia of Japan….”

January 8, 2017 / No Comments

anonymous said: I read your post about transphobia of Japan. I identify myself as genderqueer and MtF lesbian. I tried to join the event for lesbians in Tokyo, but they rejected me at the entrance. Because, I have my beautiful beard and my ID says I am biologically male. I was there with my classy black dress, but they didn’t think me as woman! This is so transphobic! Also, I think the term lesbian itself is very transphobic. TERF lesbians should go to hell. We need safe space for queer and non-binary in Japan! i’m really sorry to hear about the shitty experience that you had, anon. sadly, it’s not the first time that i’ve heard of someone having this experience and i suspect that i might even know the event that you tried to go to. it’s incredibly frustrating how a lot of LG(BT) spaces / events in Japan…

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Vesper H.

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withU: a new Japanese LGBTQIA+ social networking site
August 1, 2015

QAC 15 – Conformity: Being Genderqueer Abroad
August 29, 2013

『[4ｺﾏ]☆ＡセクシュアルとAce(エース)☆』
July 27, 2016
[Random] Thoughts, Gender[queer], Queer[ness]

“”two genders””

December 30, 2016 / No Comments

it’s incredibly ironic (and by “ironic” i mean “funny as hell”) that the very same people who call non-binary people “special snowflakes” with the implication that we are attention seekers are the very same people who go out of their way to actively seek out people like me to send these random cries for attention to. sometimes i literally get essay-length messages that amount to nothing more than “LOOK AT ME! LISTEN TO ME! STROKE MY EGO BY ACKNOWLEDGING ME!” and like… it never ceases to amaze me how oblivious these people are to the irony of their actions.

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Vesper H.

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QAC 37.5 – Life Update: Therapy / Mom Drama 3.0 / LGBT Meetups in Japan
August 11, 2015

QAC 45 – Forced Out of the Closet: 2 Years Later | Coming Out Again (Non-Binary Bi / Pan Asexual)
January 26, 2016

introducing: ユキハリ / Yukihari
April 4, 2014
[A]sexuality, [Random] Thoughts, Gender[queer], Japan[ese], Queer[ness]

めんどくささレベル5強

December 11, 2016 / 1 Comment

one of my least favorite things to do is attempt to explain in Japanese to a (usually LGB) cisgender Japanese person that: 1. no, セクシャリティー / “”sexuality”“ is not the same thing as gender. they usually get it once i explain it, but it’s still ugh because that inevitably spills over into: 2. no, オネエ / “onee” and / or ニューハーフ / “newhalf” is not synonymous with “transgender” and then when i use the word トランスジェンダー / lit. “transgender” from English– because i refuse to use any of the other Japanese words available– the person i’m talking to automatically thinks of ニューハーフ / “newhalf” (if i’m lucky) even when i’m not talking specifically about women who happen to be trans. i hate how bothトランスジェンダー / transgender and 性同一性障害者 / people with gender identity disorder– the most common way to refer to trans people in general– seemingly always make people think…

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Vesper H.

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humbled
July 31, 2018

QAC 55 – Older Asexuals: Coming Out Later In Life | Questioning | Trauma
October 23, 2016

QAC 41 – Am I Asexual? | Never Too Young To Know
October 18, 2015
Feedback, Gender[queer], Q&A, Queer[ness]

Q&A: “…does anything else about how gender is discussed estrange you?”

December 6, 2016 / No Comments

anonymous said: Branching off of your Cis-Trans binary video, does anything else about how gender is discussed estrange you? For me, settling on quoigender hasn’t been a comfortable experience, as it doesn’t provide the luxury or comfort of certainty. Coupled with ableism, aro- and acephobia, being quoigender and thus “see, not a real girl(TM) after all” makes gender itself alienating. I can’t “celebrate my gender identity” when I not convinced that I even have one, and suggesting that I should is insulting. ( re: this video / blog post ) there’s quite a lot surrounding gender and how it’s often discussed that bothers and / or alienates me, including the assumption that everyone knows their gender or even has one at all. that said, as someone who does have a gender, knows what it is and is comfortable in it, i admit that i am privileged in that regard and thus am…

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Vesper H.

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Feedback: “I just wanted to thank you for your post on the alterous vs platonic thing…”
February 23, 2016
[A]sexuality, [Random] Thoughts, Gender[queer], Queer[ness], YouTube[r]

another day, another episode of YouTube Drama à la Arielle Scarcella.

October 26, 2016 / No Comments

there are few people who i adamantly refer to a pieces of shit, Donald Trump and Arielle Scarcella being two of them. hell, i make it a point to avoid anything and everything that has Arielle in it, but being a YouTuber involved in many of the communities that Arielle likes to shit on means that her drama always finds its way into my social media outlets regardless. sigh.

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Vesper H.

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🎬 QAC 79 – The Neverending Queer-y: My Queer Ace Journey || LGBT YouTube & COPPA
January 4, 2020

QAC 72 – Outted To Religious Mom: 4 Years Later | HRT | Non-Binary Relationship || #ItGetsBetter?
September 18, 2018

#asexual pride shirt
October 27, 2013
"Why Transgender People In Japan Prefer To Be Told They Have A "Disorder""

[Random] Thoughts, Gender[queer], Japan[ese], Mental [Un]health, Queer[ness]

ARTICLE: “Why Transgender People In Japan Prefer To Be Told They Have A “Disorder””

August 17, 2016 / No Comments

content warning: pathologization / medicalization of being trans; non-binary erasure; death mention (below) while i don’t agree with everything in this article (from how things are presented or worded to more factual things), this article is still representative of the sad truth that i’m continually navigating as a non-binary person in Japan. from the way that trans people themselves here actively embrace and rally behind Gender Identity Disorder (GID) not only as a medical condition but as an identity to how pathologized & medicalized literally everything surrounding being trans is here and how that can make things especially difficult for non-binary / Xジェンダー people, even when interacting with people in the trans community which is full of transmedicalism. the blatant non-binary erasure (dare i say enbyphobia) demonstrated by the head of the largest trans / GID organization in this country illustrates that perfectly in this article. “I reject the notion of…

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Vesper H.

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QAC 31 – Relationships… Meh.
November 17, 2014

…mmm, decided there hasn’t been enough Calcifer on this blog, so here you go.
November 20, 2017

spotted: same-gender marriage feature on Japanese news
October 12, 2015