coming out as bi Archives | Queer As Cat

[A]sexuality, Q&A, Queer[ness]

Q&A: “My boyfriend has just confessed to me that he is also sexually attracted to men but…”

May 6, 2016 / No Comments

anonymous said: Hi There. My boyfriend has just confessed to me that he is also sexually attracted to men but he is not attracted to them outside of the bedroom. I was reading something online and found out that he might be a heteroromantic bisexual. I would just like to know if there are cases wherein a heteroromantic bisexual man can become a fully homosexual man? Has there been cases that you know of when this has happened? Thank you for your time. hello, anon. for anyone there is a possibility that one’s sexuality may change or that one might discover something new about oneself that one didn’t previously know. this is as true for you as it is for your boyfriend and for anyone else. in fact, this was true even before your boyfriend came out to you. however, the fact that you’ve became concerned about this upon discovering…

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Vesper H.

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QAC 45 – Forced Out of the Closet: 2 Years Later | Coming Out Again (Non-Binary Bi / Pan Asexual)

January 26, 2016 / No Comments

it’s been 2 years since i was forced out of the closet by my mom; it’s been 5 months since my last video about how things are going with my family. this video is long, but it’s also long overdue. the past 5 months have been an emotional roller coaster. from breaking off communication with my mom, to coming out to my sister as bi / panromantic, to being met with further attempts at invalidation, to being “home” for the holidays, to coming out as non-binary to my sister, to FINALLY being referred to by my real name…. 2 years later, things are finally looking up. kind of. only time will tell what 2016 will bring. TRIGGER WARNING for sexual abuse & child abuse with a time jump point in the video itself so you can safely watch and skip the trigger. […] long video is long, but that’s what…

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Vesper H.

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on today’s episode of #ConversationsWithMom….!

November 28, 2015 / No Comments

….so i just had another one of those crazy conversations with my mom (and my sister who was eavesdropping and repeatedly butting in) about sexuality that stemmed from her finally watching a documentary that i’d sent her about LGBTQ people in the black church. i mean seriously, it lasted over an hour and was all over damn place, so i’m not going to try to rehash what was actually said, but the highlights were: mom is still of the mindset that sexual orientation is a choice. she refuses to distinguish between sexual attraction (i used the word “chemistry” with her because she seemed to get that) and sexual behavior/actions one decides to take (or not take). ugh. both mom and my sister think that “everyone is bisexual” because everyone could choose to have sex with someone of the same gender if they wanted to. bi erasure runs in my family, apparently. mom…

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Vesper H.

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Q&A: “People know me as “straight” but I am afraid to come out as bisexual when I really haven’t had any experience with girls.”

September 10, 2015 / No Comments

anonymous said: Ever since elementary school I have looked at girls the same way I look at guys, but when I was younger I never thought anything of it. In 6th grade my first kiss was a girl, just a quick peck; since then I’ve only been with guys. I’m currently in a serious relationship with a guy, but lately I have been putting a lot of thought into my sexuality. People know me as “straight” but I am afraid to come out as bisexual when I really haven’t had any experience with girls. hello, anon! my apologies for taking so long to respond to your ask. ;( being in a relationship definitely makes coming out more challenging. on top of that, coming out as bi presents even more unique challenges. for one thing, people are likely to try and question or invalidate your sexuality because of your ‘lack of…

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Vesper H.

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