Q&A: “…does anything else about how gender is discussed estrange you?”

anonymous said:

Branching off of your Cis-Trans binary video, does anything else about how gender is discussed estrange you? For me, settling on quoigender hasn’t been a comfortable experience, as it doesn’t provide the luxury or comfort of certainty. Coupled with ableism, aro- and acephobia, being quoigender and thus “see, not a real girl(TM) after all” makes gender itself alienating. I can’t “celebrate my gender identity” when I not convinced that I even have one, and suggesting that I should is insulting.

( re: this video / blog post )

there’s quite a lot surrounding gender and how it’s often discussed that bothers and / or alienates me, including the assumption that everyone knows their gender or even has one at all.

that said, as someone who does have a gender, knows what it is and is comfortable in it, i admit that i am privileged in that regard and thus am not as adversely affected by such assumptions as you yourself are. even so, it is something that bothers me as well, especially since even among more non-binary aware people, 9 times out of 10 behind such assumptions lies a binarist understanding of what gender even is and the assumption that everyone relates to masculinity and / or femininity, male and / or female gender in some way or another and ought to celebrate that in whatever form it may take.

…mmm, yeah. being maverique, i’d say that 9 times out of 10 if gender is being discussed at all i’m bothered by it in some way or another. actually, 9 times out of 10 is me being uncharacteristically optimistic.