Q&A: “Am I overreacting? Here in the UK it’s not called rape…”

cw: sexual assault

anonymous said:

TW: rape. A girl digitally raped me when I was 8. I only recently remembered & I’m worried that I might have caught STI/STDs from what she did. It was in a toilet & she never washed her hands (risk of faecal matter?), bit her finger nails (risk blood & saliva inside me, too). her nails were sharp&ragged, so might’ve scratched me inside. It was 14 yrs ago & I’ve never (nor ever will) have sex, so should I get tested/Am I overreacting? Here in the UK it’s not called rape, so I feel invalidated.

anon, i’m afraid that i’m probably among the least qualified people to offer you any kind of advice or suggestions when it comes to something like this. off the top of my head, i can’t even think of any trustworthy resources to point you to…

that said, i do not think you are overreacting and regardless of what legally constitutes rape in the UK, your feelings about what happened to you are absolutely valid. whatever action you deem worth taking (or not taking) in order to put your concerns about STIs / STDs at ease is absolutely warranted, regardless of how much time has passed. getting tested for STIs / STDs isn’t just about looking out for a potential partner that you may have sex with, it’s also about looking out for yourself and your own health and well-being. even though you’ve never had (and never will have) sex, your concerns are still valid.

the decision of whether or not to get tested is entirely yours and yours alone, but regardless of what you decide to do (or not do), your decision is valid. your feelings are valid. referring to what happened as rape is valid. you are valid.

i’m sorry i’m unable to offer you any real help, but i wish you all the best, anon.